Blood and Lust
by Kendra Luehr
Summary: A collection of smutty and humorous Jokachel oneshots based upon reader requests. Feel free to add your own here.
1. Interrogation

**A/N** - This one-shot was inspired by and made for asylumzero, and I know you (asylumzero) wanted Rachel to use bondage as revenge like he did to her in my story, but I decided to take it one step further (actually, changed it completely, hahaha) since I thought the idea of Rachel being in control for once would be kind of interesting. Hopefully it's not complete crap...hope you like it asylumzero! ;0)

"Interrogation"

The barium lights flickered overhead as Rachel irritably crossed her arms, her blue eyes boring into the elusive clown prince of crime's as he continued to grin back at her. Always grinning...always _laughing._

With an unexpected shiver, Rachel forced herself to appear intimidating as she snapped, "I'm _not_ going to ask you again, Joker...what do you have planned for Gotham?"

_"Planned?"_ Giving a derisive snicker, he plainly returned, "Well whoever said I had anything already planned? I mean, do you ac-tu-a-ly think I _have_ a puh-_lan?"_

Spurred onward by a sudden burst of fury, Rachel took the Joker by the throat and slammed his head back against the wall, her nose mere inches from his as she snarled, "Do _not_ toy with me! This isn't one of your games!"

"No? Well it should be" he smugly returned, his shark-like eyes growing almost predatory as he licked his lips. Showing her his shackled hands, he mockingly purred, "Y'know, I've _always_ loved a woman who takes control of a situation. Are you going to _pun_-ish me, by any chance?"

Disgusted by his insinuation, Rachel's eyes widened when she discovered that the Joker was telling her the truth, his arousal shamelessly tenting his pants as he leered at her like a pre-pubescent teenager.

Infuriated by his lack of respect, Rachel tightened her grip about his throat before growling, "Get that high school locker room mindset out of your head before I do it for you! This is a place for interrogation, _not_ for lewd pleasures!"

The Joker cocked his head to the side, feigning innocence as he gave her a grin. "Prose before hos, eh? I like that...means you're boring, pre-dic-ta-ble, and _very_ easy for my kind to analyze."

Rachel scowled. "I-I am _not!_ I'll have you know that I am _very_ unpredictable!"

"Yeah?" the Joker asked, clearly disbelieving her. "Prove it, then."

Standing her ground, Rachel was fully aware that the madman was trying to get her to do something she'd regret, but if this something happened to get her the information she needed, she would more than willingly sink to any possible low.

Finally nodding her consent, Rachel smoothly agreed, "Alright, you want me to be unpredictable?" When he grinned back at her, the attorney noticed his expression change when she straddled his waist and sat down upon his firm desire, her hands gripping at his shoulders as she cooed, "There now, this unpredictable enough for you?"

The Joker grimaced in aroused agony when Rachel began to innocently shift her hips, her hot mouth brushing against his chin before she reached his ear and nipped at the lobe. "Tell me _all_ that you know" she urged, her moist tongue now tracing along his pulse as she reached a hand down inside his pants.

Groaning, the Joker threw his head back in strained ecstasy as he felt her fingers wrap around his shaft, his yellowed teeth gritting as she gave him a long, firm stroke. "Bitch" he hissed, only to seize a fistful of Rachel's hair and crash her soft mouth to his.

The sensation of his svelte, bumpy scars against her lips made Rachel squirm, tears of pain watering her eyes when she felt his teeth tear into the soft, fleshy pad of her lower lip.

Seeming to revel in the taste of her blood, the Joker growled into their heated kiss and lapped at her shallow wound, his spindly fingers ripping her tucked blouse out of her trousers before he slipped his hand down her pants.

Crying out, Rachel threw her head back as a soft, breathy moan escaped her throat, her fingers digging into the Joker's shoulders as he pressed three fingers inside her plush walls and slammed her back against the table.

Mounting her with an animalistic fury, the Joker removed his shackled hands from her womanhood and placed them about her neck, Rachel gagging as she hissed, "Tell me...w-what I need to know..."

When the Joker merely gave a whoop of a laugh in response, Rachel furiously jabbed him in the solar plexus before rolling over top of him, her blue eyes bright and ireful as she took him by the chin and roughly claimed his bloody lips with her own. Plundering his mouth with her tongue, Rachel moaned into the heated kiss and felt a sense of pride when the Joker did the same, her clothing feeling as if it were burning her everywhere that he happened to touch her.

Panting against the Joker's lips, Rachel gripped him by the lapels of his shirt before urging more forcefully, "Tell me what I want to _know..."_

Giggling, the Joker defiantly shook his head in negation, but his laughter soon turned to a strained growl when Rachel tugged his slacks down to his knees and began massaging him where he secretly desired to be touched. Rolling his hips in time to her deliberate strokes, the Joker dug his nails into the flesh of her upper arms and squeezed his eyes tightly closed, his subconscious hating her and himself for allowing her to have such a strong hold over his current physical state. And yet, a sick part of him _wanted_ her to do it...wanted her to take complete control. In all his life, nobody had ever dared to question his authority, so now that some snobbish assistant DA had taken hold of the reigns, he couldn't help but feel a monumental thrill course throughout his veins.

_"Tell_ me what I want to _know"_ Rachel hissed, her gaze cold and cutting as the Joker once against shook his head. Furious at this response, she held his hands firmly over his chest before lowering her mouth to his skin, her tongue laving the flesh as she felt him quiver beneath her touch.

Cursing, the Joker curled his toes as he felt Rachel's moist lips travel lower and lower, an animalistic growl rumbling deep within his chest when she took him in her mouth. Her lips were honeyed and sweet against his sensitive organ, his spidery fingers fisting her hair as he began to thrust in tandem to her torturous licks.

_Yes, yes, yes, yes..._

Groaning, the Joker felt an all too familiar pressure begin to build within his loins, but before he could find himself granted his sweet release, Rachel slithered back up his body and placed her lips at his ear, her voice low and husky as she purred, "I'll let you come, but _only_ if you tell me what I need to know."

Now it was the Joker's turn to be furious, his eyes like blazing embers as he snarled, "You cuh-_learly_ misunderestimate me, beautiful."

Rachel couldn't help but smirk. "Yeeeah, we'll see about that..."

-- Fifteen Minutes Later --

"All done?"

Grinning back at the commissioner, Rachel cheerily returned, "Yep, the Joker completely opened up to me...apparently he had four of Maroni's men lace the Queen Anne cruise liner with some bombs. It's set to sail early tomorrow morning, so I'd suggest you guys get on it ASAP."

"Wow" Gordon remarked, "I'm _really_ impressed, Miss Dawes. Harvey said you were good, but I honestly didn't believe him...what exactly is your secret?"

Rachel smirked. "Oh, I don't know, I guess it just has something to do with the wiles of a woman..."

**A/N** - Wow, I am SUCH a pervert, hahaha...I'll try to get to either the peeping tom or the strip poker request next. I'm not sure which it'll be since I haven't started either, but hmm, I might even do the blindfold request next, I just don't know! lol Feel free to add any other requests, because I LOVE writing for this smexy pairing. ;0)


	2. Shower Time!

**A/N** - Okaaaay, I might as well just get this out in the open right off the bat (er, no pun intended XD) that this was written for the Batman Kink Meme, so we ALL know that this is on the raunchy side. XD I mean, it's definitely not the worst thing I've ever written, but let's just rate this as **MATURE**, mmkay, kiddies? ;0)

WARNINGS: Smut (er...duh), foul language (Ooh, I LOVE it when they talk dirty! ;0P), fantasizing, and all the like.

THEME/PROMPT - Wet

"Shower Time!"

Rachel closed her eyes as the water continued to pelt her relentlessly from overhead, a hand traveling down her body as she imagined that it was _his_ hand searching, seeking..._wanting._

Biting her lip to fight off a small moan, the attorney dipped her fingers past her plush opening before crying out his name, her cheeks suddenly growing rouge when she realized how ridiculous it sounded to scream the word 'Joker'. And even more ridiculous still, why was she shouting _his_ name when it was Harvey she loved? Harvey whom she wanted?

_'No'_ Rachel realized, _'I may love Harvey, but he's not the one I want...'_

Ever since the Joker had held her at knife-point at Bruce's party, she'd fantasized about him overpowering her with his strength and forcing her to submit to his desires. She knew it was wrong, but the grip he'd had on her chin was almost exhilarating. It was a grip that said 'you are mine', and she wanted him to remind her of the fact by making her do the unthinkable.

Just when Rachel moved to touch herself again, she felt a soft, gloved hand trail down her shoulder before viciously seizing a breast.

Jumping in surprise, Rachel tried to move away from the figure, but instead she found herself being pulled flush against his arousal.

"Why, hel-_lo,_ Miss _Dawessss"_ the familiar voice purred, Rachel giving a small squeak when he bit at the soft hollow of her neck. "I've been, uh..._following_ you these past few days -- just for kicks, of course -- and the, uh..._exhertion_ has made me need a shower. Mind if I juh-_oin_ you?"

Trying her best to slow the soft, excited pants of her breathing, Rachel rolled her hips and rubbed her bare bottom against his arousal in response, a thrilling sensation cutting through her body when she heard him moan his approval.

Considerably surprised by the attorney's actions, the Joker placed his hands on her hips and began to mimic her grinding. "I always _knew_ you were a slut" he growled into her ear, his tongue darting out in order to lick the lobe as she gave a small whine. "Is this what you do for _Harrrr_vey? Does he tell you to get on your knees and take it like the _naugh_-ty lit-tle girl you are?"

Moaning at the thought of the Joker actually forcing her to do this, Rachel shook her head and closed her eyes when she felt his tongue burning along her neck and shoulders.

"What a shame" he purred, the nipping and licking causing Rachel to gasp as he began to grind more forcefully against her backside. "A girl like you _needs_ to be ordered around...when you're used to getting your way all the time, it's very, uh..._humbling."_

With a whimper, Rachel felt herself being whirled around before the Joker crashed his scarred lips against her own, his tongue plundering her mouth as he slammed her against the wall and began to grind into her harder and faster.

Moaning into their heated kiss, Rachel clawed at the damp fabric of his purple suit and wrapped her legs about his waist, her tongue caressing his as he began to thrust in time to the quickening beat of his heart. His arousal was straining against the suffocating material of his pants, and Rachel longed to free it so she could feel him relieve the acute ache in her loins.

"Joker, please" she begged, _"please,_ I...I..."

"You _what?"_ he growled, his hands twisting her breasts to the point of pain as she moaned into his shoulder.

"I need you to...to..."

Suddenly halting his actions, the Joker interrupted Rachel by retrieving his blade and bringing it up to her cheek, her eyes widening in surprise when he turned it so that the handle was facing her.

"Go on, take it" the Joker purred. "Get...cre-_a_-tive."

With trembling fingers, Rachel took the knife and brought it toward the collar of his purple shirt, the blade tearing through the fabric and exposing his pale, scarred chest to her ever wandering eyes. The sensation of his clothing ripping shot a heated jolt straight to the Joker's groin, his yellowed teeth gritting as he braced his hands against the wall and urged her to continue.

Spurred onward by his obvious pleasure, Rachel peeled away his shirt and jacket while nipping and licking at his toned torso. The Joker gave a deep and throaty moan when she licked especially close to his aching point, his hips shifting so that his swollen member repeatedly bumped against her welcoming body.

Finally getting the hint, Rachel took the Joker's knife and sliced the closure of his pants completely asunder, a satisfied grunt escaping the clown prince of crime's lips when his arousal burst through the zipper and into Rachel's awaiting hands. Stroking him gently at first, the attorney's gaze innocently traveled upward to gauge the Joker for a reaction, but his eyes were squeezed tightly closed and his teeth were clenched to the point of pain.

Feeling the tremendous desire to please him, Rachel wrapped her pouty lips about his member and began to lick and suck, the Joker growling lowly before fisting her hair and forcing her to take him in deeper.

_"God,_ yes" he hissed, his hips beginning to thrust as he listened to her soft, hungry moans. When he felt her hands join in with her incredible tongue and teeth, his eyes rolled back as he gave a pleasured grunt. At this rate, he was sure that he wouldn't be able to last much longer.

As if sensing this, Rachel gave him one last lick before sliding back up his body, her eyes veiled with lust as she brought her lips to his ear and gently bit the lobe. "Take me" she pleaded, her nails now digging into his shoulders in preparation for what she'd been longing for for so long.

Fueled by the need to relieve the excruciating ache in his loins, the Joker gave a growl before rigorously impaling her with his throbbing shaft.

With a cry of delight, Rachel felt her fleshy walls part in order to encompass his entire girth, her nails scouring down his back as he began to punctuate each of her moans with a frenzied thrust.

Breasts bouncing, Rachel moved her hips upward to meet with his rough strokes, his member touching that special spot each time that he pounded into her.

Tangling his fingers through her hair, the Joker gave the attorney a deep and bruising kiss that completely wrought her senses, her legs wrapping about his hips as she moaned into the heated kiss and held on tight.

Driving into Rachel again and again, the Joker growled into her shoulder as they suddenly staggered backwards, the attorney grabbing onto the shower curtain for support before they toppled over and ripped it down with them.

Far too aroused to care about the damaged property, the Joker laid Rachel across the ruined curtain and continued to ride her with an animalistic drive that couldn't be shaken. Choking back an impassioned scream, Rachel clung to him for dear life as his thrusts grew deeper, harder, and more pronounced, his fingers interlocking with hers as he gave a gutteral cry and emptied his seed into her womb.

Panting and completely spent, Rachel moaned in disappointment when the Joker withdrew from her warm haven and began to re-clothe himself. To her astonishment, she discovered that a great deal of his make-up had worn off during their encounter, her blue eyes widening as she gazed upon a surprisingly boyish countenance. He was young...probably not much older than her, and the very notion startled her quite tremendously. Fortunately for the attorney, the Joker was completely oblivious to his current disposition.

"Well, that was _funnn"_ he purred, a chuckle escaping his throat when Rachel gave a pitiful whine. "Don't worry, sweet cheeks, we'll be sure to do this again sometime soon... I'm a man of my word."

As the Joker left the bathroom cackling, Rachel stiffly sat up and realized that she was going to have to explain a _lot_ of bruises to Harvey the next day.

A/N - Eheheh...wow, I'm blushing. So I'd like to give a BIG thank you to those of you who've reviewed and given me lots of nice feedback and prompts! I'm currently co-writing the strip poker idea with DCCourtJester, and it is SO much fun. Please let me know what you guys think! ;0)


	3. Peeping Tom

CO-WRITTEN WITH THE LOVE-UH-LY JOKERLUV :) I play Rachel, and she plays that oh-so-smexy Joker. ;0)

"Peeping Tom"

Sighing, Rachel wearily entered her apartment before tossing her keys onto the counter top. It had been a _long_ day in at the DA's office, and all she truly wanted to do was take a nice, relaxing bath and go to sleep. As she flicked on the TV by her bed, however, she soon heard a chilling laughter that had been haunting her dreams for the past week. Whirling around in accordance with the noise, Rachel balked upon spotting the Joker's giddy face pressed up against the camera lens, his laughter reaching a shattering crescendo as he suddenly zoomed in on his latest victim.

_'Wait a minute'_ Rachel thought, _'this isn't a live feed...that's Leslie Meyers. She was kidnapped a week ago.'_ Feeling slightly better that this was just a repeated broadcast, the attorney slowly sank down onto her bed as she watched the Joker with a sick sort of fascination. Ever since he'd attacked her at Bruce's party, she'd found herself thinking and wondering about his way of life. Why did he go after the helpless and the innocent? Did it make himself feel better to ruin the lives of others?

When the Joker gave a particularly piercing laugh, Rachel jumped when he withdrew his knife and placed the blade straight between Leslie's lips. The gesture was almost like fellatio due to the way he was moving the knife in and out of her bleeding mouth, Rachel giving a sharp intake of breath when she felt a sudden pang from her aching loins. Feeling nauseous over the notion that the Joker's sick methods were turning her on, the attorney tried to ignore the throbbing from her nether regions when the Joker suddenly forced Leslie to lick the blade.

Whimpering, Rachel closed her eyes and sank back onto the bed, her insides on fire when she realized that _she_ could've been in Leslie's place if Bruce hadn't stopped the Joker from kidnapping her. Something about the scenario before her filled her body with a tremendous sense of desire, her well-manicured hand trailing down her body before brushing at the hem of her skirt. She was now so close to her aching point that she could scarcely breathe, her teeth biting into her lower lip as she envisioned the Joker forcing his blade into her own mouth.

Moaning, Rachel slipped her fingers past her panties and began to trace circles across her swollen womanhood, her hips bucking in time to her rhythmic administrations as she began to manipulate herself harder and faster. In the background, the Joker's laughter grew far more hysterical on the TV, Rachel gasping as she felt herself coming closer and closer to her release. Completely unbeknownst to her, she had a late night visitor out on her fire escape.

The Joker sat on the stairs watching her, as he had now done for the past two weeks. She was so beautiful… He fingered his blade as he remembered her eyes filling up with fright when he told her the story of how he got his scars. The look of sheer terror upon the mentioning of his phantom wife's face being carved had been utterly priceless. An evil chuckle broke out as he watched her bring herself closer and closer to the brink. Licking his lips, he wondered if Harvey was in her thoughts. What a waste, such a pretty little vixen being stuck with a drag queen. The guy probably couldn't even pleasure a woman who hadn't had sex in years.

As he continued to stare at her, she began moaning softly. A warm feeling overtook his body and his cock began to respond, his imagination going into overdrive as he pictured himself running his fingers through her luscious brown locks. Her eyes were closed and she tilted her head backward, exposing her elongated neck. His hand slipped down his trousers, and as he fantasized himself kissing and biting that creamy throat, his fingers wrapped around his hardened member and then began stroking. A soft growl escaped from his twisted mouth as pictures of them engaged in a kiss flashed through his mind, his tongue dueling with hers as she fought to breathe.

His pumping increased and his head rolled back as he heard her voice of satisfaction getting louder. In his mind, she ripped open his shirt and leered at him in a way no one would have ever suspected, proving to him what he thought about her all along: she was an Assistant DA during the day, but by night she was a whore. His whore. Her blouse is gone, and as he slides the blade under her bra, she whispers his name and he pulls it back, tearing it open and revealing two lovely mounds of flesh for him to feast upon.

Reaching beneath her blouse with one hand, Rachel began massaging her breast as she envisioned the Joker dutifully hovering over her awaiting body, her gasps growing louder and more pronounced as she touched herself with one hand and scoured a nipple with the other. He would be rough with her, she decided, and that was why she left bloody half-moons all across her bosom.

Glancing through hazy eyes at the television screen, Rachel whimpered when she saw the close-up of the Joker licking his scarred lips, her mouth quivering as she wondered what it would be like to feel that tongue touch her in her most private places. Curling her toes at the thought, she began to rotate her hips for more friction as she arched her back and choked on a moan. She was close...she _knew_ she was, and the symphony going on inside her soul made her want to sing her desire to a rising forte. Throwing her head back with a pleasured gasp, Rachel felt her walls contract about her fingers as she shouted his name, sweat beading along her brow as she continued to toss her head back and forth amidst her aroused delirium.

Envisioning her at his mercy, the Joker pictured Rachel begging him to take her while the tip of his blade left trails of his crimson lust in its wake. He licked the blood and slid back up her body, his tongue plunging into her delicious ruby mouth. Tasting her coppery fluid only fueled her desire for him as she slid her fingers through his hair.

As he buried his head against her neck, biting and sucking at the flesh, he heard her whisper to him, "Take me."

The Joker bit down on his lip, drawing blood, stroking harder and faster as his moans became louder and in sync with Rachel's.

"Patience is a virtue" he whispered back as he licked the shell of her ear.

Kissing, licking, and biting his way down her body, a frustrated Rachel tried to regain her breath. Reaching that special hidden treasure, the Joker's tongue worked its magic inside her. Grabbing onto the edge of the bed, Rachel pitifully writhed underneath him and gave an impassioned cry. Dropping the knife, the Joker dug his nails into her hips and held her down, all the while forcing the union of pleasure and pain. He looked up at her, knowing that she was close. Deciding that it wasn't the proper time, he slowed his administrations while she glanced down at him, a face of fury as she shouted, "Y-you creep!"

With a wicked smile, he seductively winked at her and continued to bring her to the edge, pulling her back over and over again until she cried out, "Please…!"

The fire burned amidst the Joker's loins as his head rolled back, his eyes slowly closing as he focused on her cries of pleasure. He stalked up her body once again like a panther ready to devour its prey. Licking up her stomach, his tongue slid up the valley between her breasts and snaked up her throat, over her chin, and past her lips. "Please what?" he purred.

Opening her eyes, Rachel looked at him with desperation in her blue irises, her voice positively breathlessly as she tells him, "Make me yours."

Lacing his fingers with hers, he pins her hands above her head….

She cries out his name and his body begins to convulse as he no longer has control. With his eyes rolled back in his head, he rumbles his release. His warm, thick fluid pours over his hand, splashing against his shirt. "Oh, you bitch…" he mutters.

The Joker's body continues to shake as he breathes heavily, his eyes still closed, savoring every second. Then he hears it. Was it what he thought he heard? Did she just cry out his name? He opens his eyes and turns his head to study her. He sees her body shaking, eyes closed, and lips mouthing his name. Well, what do you know? Harvey isn't the one after all. A sinister smile crosses his face as a plan develops in his foreboding brain…

Whimpering as she came down from her mind-blowing release, Rachel allowed her hand to caress her cheek as she imagined that this time, despite their savage love-making, the Joker was gentle with her. She wanted to be touched in a tender fashion, even if it was only for a moment. Squirming, she realized that her core was beginning to throb again, her hand trailing down her shirt as she envisioned the clown prince of crime stroking and nipping sensitive flesh. "Please...more" she whispered, barely conscious of the fact that she was speaking her innermost desires.

Oblivious to her voyeur, Rachel sat up and braced herself against the backboard of her bed, her legs spreading as she reached between her thighs and began to stroke herself as before. Moaning the Joker's name, only louder this time, she flopped her head back against the wall and thrust her chest out in utter delectation, her hips shifting as she felt her honeyed juices coat her fingers and make her deliberate actions all the better. God, she wanted more...she wanted _him._

A sudden loud noise at her window caused her jolt to attention, her blue eyes wide with terror as she pulled her skirt down and staggered over toward the fire escape. Peering out into the darkness, she scrunched her brows in confusion when she glanced around and spotted……absolutely nothing.

With a shrug of her shoulders, Rachel was about to determine that her nerves were finally getting to her when she spotted something small, white and black, and lying face-up on the stairs. To her surprise – and excitement – she realized that it was a card…. A Joker.

A/N – A BIG thank you to those of you who've given suggestions and reviews thus far! I / we LOVE you! Also, JOIN MY JOKACHEL COMMUNITY ON LIVEJOURNAL!! It's under the user name JokerRachelFans. :) I've made some "smexy" splices of them about to get their freak on, so you can look there and find them, hahaha. Also, the love-uh-ly DCCourtJester is making my fan fics into a GRAPHIC NOVEL ON DEVIANTART! Isn't that frickin' awesome? :)


	4. Taste

**A/N** - This chapter is WAY too explicit to post here, in my opinion, so that's why I'll only be giving you a little taste...er...if you'll forgive the pun! lol If you'd like to read it in its filthy entirety, you can go to my profile on adultfanfiction (link's on my profile) or to my Jokachel community JokerRachelFans. Enjoy!

CO-WRITTEN WITH JOKERLUV

"Taste"

Feeling tears burning along her lashes, Rachel continued to struggle about within her restraints as she listened for something...anything that could give her a clue as to where she was. Judging by the blanket of darkness against her eyes, she could ascertain that she was blindfolded and tied to a chair, but all memories of how she'd gotten in said predicament were a complete blank. "Hello?" she called, her body squirming about as she gave a tearful grunt. "Can anybody hear me!?"

The Joker watched her from a corner of the room. Her attempt at breaking free was typical of mankind, yet she looked so adorable trying. Seeing her predicament, his mind raced with all the nasty things he could do to her, a salacious smile crossing his cracked lips as he gave a chuckle. Remembering the night she received his calling card and the excitement that was written all over her face, he couldn't help but wonder how long she had felt that way. His thoughts were interrupted when Rachel yelled out for help. Looking over at her, he decided, _'Let's get it on.'_

Swaying towards her, he exclaimed, "I'm here, dollface, what's the matter? Tied up at the moment?"

Recognizing the voice in an instant, Rachel felt her heart leap up into her throat as she quivered with an unabashed longing. "You" she rasped out, "h-how did you find me? Why have you done this to me when you could've just called?"

_'At least that way I could move'_ she grumpily thought.

The Joker smiled as he bent down, his face inches from hers as he whispered, "Come on, sugar lips, you know me better than that." He gauged her reaction as she remained silent. "Mmm, I don't recall you ever being rendered speechless before, is this something new or are you just lusting in heat?" A dark chuckle escaped from his iniquitous soul.

Rachel couldn't help but scowl. She hated whenever someone was able to read her so easily, so she shook her head before snapping, _"Don't_ call me that...I'm not your sugar lips, your baby, your honey, your anything, so you just get the smirk that I know you have off your lips right now before I'm forced to do something I'll regret!"

Although Rachel was seething on the outside, she had to keep shifting about in her seat to keep her growing arousal from throbbing at her center.

The Joker noticed her inability to sit still and knew she was lying. "Sure, whatever you say, _hon_-eeeeyy" he drawled. Taking the steely knife out of his pocket, he beamed as she flinched when she heard the click of the blade. He wet the corner of his mouth and stroked her cheek with the tip. "How about a game?" he asked.

Rachel audibly whimpered. "W-what kind of game?" she rasped out, her teeth biting her tongue as she tried to sense what the Joker was doing. Not being able to see him was driving her crazy, but she assumed that it was all apart of his twisted amusement.

Moving her cheek away from the knife, Rachel struggled about in her bindings once more before giving a defeated grunt. "Am I allowed to move in this game, or are you going to be cruel and force me to sit here like an oaf?"

The Joker grabbed her head and dug the blade deeper into her cheek, forcing her to stop moving. In a sinister voice he explained, "Oh, you'll be free of your restraints, if you guess co-rrectly, that is." He glanced at his watch and continued, "You've been here for hours…are you hungry?"

A/N - Aaaand not long after that it gets pret-tay darn raunchy, so yeah...the end! lol Strip poker's coming up next! ;0)

THE CONTINUATION of this is on AFF and LJ! LOOK ON MY PROFILE TO FIND IT.


	5. Strip Poker

A/N - At last, the long-awaited Strip Poker chappie! CO-WRITTEN WITH DCCOURTJESTER :-D

"Strip Poker"

Feeling a bead of sweat roll down her nose to her chin, Rachel shuddered as the Joker's aphotic eyes continued to bore into her own. Abruptly looking away from him, she trembled as she watched his gloved fingers begin dealing out their cards, her teeth biting into her lower lip as she squeaked, "H-how do we play? I mean...I don't really think I understand what we're doing..."

Not to mention the fact that Rachel didn't even understand why she was there in the first place, what with her having been kidnapped and all. She had been minding her own business in the DA parking lot when a hand had gone over her mouth, and with it her consciousness. So now here she was, sitting in a chair at a card table playing what appeared to be a harmless game with a madman. What was the point?

Twitching slightly with each new card being tossed between them, the Joker hummed quite happily with his new catch. Following her was becoming a rather normal thing for him, which came around on spontaneous notions on when he wanted to screw with the poor woman's mind. His tongue slithered out and ran along his lips, thus signifying that he was going to speak soon.

"Well, be-eaut-i-ful" A cheery note was evident in his voice as he leaned over towards her with a curled smiled, "...The game is not that hard-uh...a child can play it..." He giggled afterward as he kicked back, all the while continuing to deal out the cards in a slow manner so that he could explain. "...Oh, and this may be running through that pretty little mind of yours..." He reached out and poked her nose with his right index finger with a chuckle. "But I was bored...and I felt like playing with you." He made a pouty face and his tone mocked the situation.

Shunting from his touch, Rachel gave him a disgusted scowl as she snapped, "Good to know that I'm a plaything you can just turn to whenever you're bored...if you wanted something fun to do, why didn't you just go to some toy store? You seem like a simpleton who's easy amused, after all."

Stubbornly folding her arms, Rachel crossed her legs and shivered when the Joker gave her yet another predatory look with his eyes. What the hell was _wrong_ with him!?

"If you would really pre-fer me to go blow up some buildings and get in a scuffle with Batsy, I guess I can go do thaat..." The Joker took a tune to the last two words as his eyes narrowed on her much like a lion would on its prey. After a few seconds ticked by, his tongue began to click as he swayed side to side. Finishing the dealing, they both now had five cards face down on the table, and the rest of the deck was placed in between them.

While picking up his five cards, the Joker leaned back in his chair as he began to babble on about the game. "It is rather simple, you see... Depending on your hand, you will either be granted a vic-tor-y or defeat...otherwise known as a piece of clothing. The highest type of hand is a Straight Flush, and it can be of any suit with ascending cards; basically everyone from the same group… Like if everyone from your DA Office got together…all the big shots, that is. An example would be an Eight of Hearts to King of Hearts with each card in-between. The second highest hand is a Four of a Kind, and this hand can contain four tens and then a random card for the fifth. Easy enough, like get-ting four friends to laugh at the fifth wheel of the party." He motioned out as if pointing and laughing at someone.

"Next is a Full House; this hand has three of the same card and then two of another. Simply put, it can be three Kings and two tens… Kinda like a set of female triplets looking at a nice pair of male twins." He chuckled as his eyebrows rose up and down with the obvious message. "Next is a Flush, and this hand is all of the same suit without any need of rank order. An example would be the Ace of Spades, Deuce of Spades, Six of Spades, Ten of Spades, and then a Jack of Spades. Pretty much as long as you're part of the fam-i-ly, there is no reason to worry about the DA office coming down to rain fire on your ass for crimes… Oh, wait… You put most of Gotham's bad guys in one shot… Let me see… Didn't I blow up the judge? Never mind that." The Joker's hand came up to his lips as he looked up at the ceiling to think about what had happened to the judge, but he already knew damn well what had happened. Soon his eyes returned to hers with their predatory hunger.

"Next is a Straight, and this hand has to be in rank order, but does care for a suit. An example is an Ace of Hearts, Deuce of Spades, Three of Diamonds, Four of Spades, and Five of Hearts. It's pretty much a group of whores at the cor-ner without care of race or gender, but whoever's been working the corner longer gets the first job. Lower still is a Three of a Kind, and this hand can be described by, say, three sevens and then two random cards: Six of Spades and Four of Hearts. This is kinda like three Arkham inmates playing with the heads of two of the 'doctors'." There was a mad cackle afterward which was then followed by a giggle.

"Then there is a Two Pair which contains, say, a pair of sevens and a pair of sixes with an ex-tra card, like an Ace of Clubs, for example. To put it simply, it would be like kickboxing… Both your hands and feet are attacking the other person's head, singling out the idiot that doesn't belong. Then there is a one pair, a pair of sixes with an Ace of Hearts, Seven of Diamonds, and a Deuce of Clubs. Really, all you care about is the fact that their eyes are showing fear; the rest of the body does not really matter. The lowest hand is a High Card hand, and that is when you have, say, a Ten of Spades, Nine of Clubs, Six of Hearts, Three of Spades, and a Deuce of Hearts. As long as the boss of the mob has the big men to defend him, he's good…but stupid. Does that help, be-eaut-i-ful?" He clicked his tongue, then chuckled as he put a smile on his face with a small cackle.

Still leaning on the chair, the Joker looked down at his hand, then popped his head up with an: "Oh! One more thing, beautiful, you can swap out cards once, then there can be a re-deal… If you put down two cards, I can then deal you out two more cards, but you forfeit the two you dropped…. Very easy, see… Kinda like blowing up a couple buildings you don't want in your view of the sunset.…" His purple gloved hand appeared as an index finger rose, and he shook his hand in a scolding way. His hand was face down on the table as he pulled the other up and made a motion to signify an explosion. "Boom!" It was quickly followed by a giggle and then he stilled himself. "…That good enough, Miss Dawes?"

Rachel's face had been a mixture of horror and fascination during his entire speech, but now that he had acknowledged her directly, she forced her features into a repugnant scowl. To think that the Joker actually _enjoyed_ the knowledge of his having killed so many made her sick, and the fact that he used said murders to describe the rules of the card game settled with her even worse. She wanted to tell him that he was a monster, a fiend, the scum on the bottoms of her highly-priced shoes, but instead she forced her lips into a tight smile and returned, "Fine...what other choice do I have?"

When the Joker gave a grin, Rachel took up her cards and uneasily examined her hand. When she discovered that she had a straight flush, her eyes immediately lit up, but she tried to hide her triumph by twisting her lips into a thoughtful pout. "You first or me?" she asked, a small smirk gracing her mouth.

Watching her face twist into various emotions amused him more then he would ever let on. Just watching someone squirm before you while just talking gave the Joker such a joy that very few would ever understand. Tilting his head slightly, his body suddenly twitched, "You can play a friendly game...Or we can play a not so friendly game..." He chuckled darkly as his free hand spun his knife around his fingers. Gazing over at Rachel, he noted her reaction when she had looked to her cards, and placed his cards down upon the table. "Let us make this interesting...be-aut-i-ful..." He chimed happily as his free hand flowed into the air with emphasis. "How about the winner of each hand chooses what the other person looses, eh,eh,eh?" He tilted his head with each 'eh' and smiled devilishly. "Ladies first my deeear."

Truly believing that she wouldn't be beaten, Rachel mirrored his devilish smile before agreeing, "Alright, fine...if I win, you have to take off your pants. I know how much you value your dignity, after all." Now placing her cards face-up onto the table, she smirked before revealing, "A straight flush. How 'bout you, Clown Boy?"

The Clown Prince of Crime did not cringe at the highest hand, nor did he laugh in victory at her. Slowly he revealed his first card as a purple leathered glove slowly dug underneath, then flicked it over. "...Ace of Spades..." Then the next card. "...King of Spades... Queen of Spades... The Prince of Spades... The Ten of Spades... Deeeary...You lose...Spades rank highest, next are the Hearts, next are the Clubs, and the lowest suit of them all...are _Hearts _..." He placed a disgusting tone to the last word as he leaned in to look at her devilishly. Suddenly he burst out laughing as he slung back and slapped his knee. "It seems-uh, that my dignity will not be shot at first...but yours..." He motioned to her and continued, "Oh, by the way, I also out rank you by royalty." He motioned to his cards, then looked back to her with his erratic motions. "Your shirt, please."

"God DAMMIT!" Slamming her fist down onto the card table, Rachel felt her insides roil with nausea at the thought of the Joker getting a firsthand look at what she'd only shown a small handful of men. Deciding to play it cool, Rachel irritably rose from her chair and shrugged her shoulders. "Alright, fine" she agreed, "off it goes." Giving the Joker an almost defiant look, Rachel crossed her arms in front of her waist and raised the blouse above her head, her cheeks growing a delightful shade of rouge as she tossed the raiment in the clown's face. No need for him to stare too long, after all...

Re-seating herself, Rachel then folded her hands in front of her before grumbling, "My turn?"

The Joker's eyebrows twitched up in approval as she took her top off, a sly whistle coming from his scarred lips as she sent him a scowl. Then he was face first with his punishment: her blouse being thrown at him. Oh, how scary... Suddenly he swept up the cards, shuffled them, and slapped them down hard before the b-eau-ti-ful woman in front of him. "Hit me, Miss Dawes."

"Gladly" Rachel snarled, raising her hand as if she were genuinely going to strike him. Instead, she rested the flat of her palm against the table as she used her other hand to deal out the cards. Smiling sweetly after she'd discovered her own hand, she looked up at the Joker before lowly cooing, "Well, well, well...what have we here? I believe it's a Four of a Kind. Surely your luck can't override mine once more?"

Giving him a sly grin, Rachel cupped her face in her palm and awaited his answer. With a giggle, the Joker then overturned his cards and allowed her to take a peek at his winning hand.

With her mouth agape, Rachel felt a cold chill overcome her as she realized that he'd won...again. How was it possible!?

"You're cheating" Rachel decided, her eyes narrowing as she rose from her perch. "You can't keep getting straight flushes!"

"True, true, deeeary. Well... the straight flushes thing-uh..." He shuffled the cards then slapped the entire deck in front of her. "Your deal then, love...Oh, by the way...Take off your pants."

Positively livid, Rachel muttered a string of lady-like curses before turning her attention to the buckle of her pants. Still grumbling to herself, she unfastened the belt -- briefly thought about lashing the Joker over the head with it -- and slowly slid the black fabric down over her thighs. The cold, yet somehow not completely unwelcome chill of the air caused her nipples to stiffen, her body noticeably shaking as she nervously sank back into her seat.

Now swiping the cards off the table, Rachel kept her eyes glued firmly to her task at hand as she dealt out the deck. Flipping her cards over, she sucked in a breath before revealing, "I've got a Full House. How about you?"

The Joker was quite happy with how fate was dealing out the cards, if you could even call it 'fate' that is. Shifting uncomfortably in his chair, the Joker took his cards and threw down two of them. "Hit me. Hit me." He said with a nice change of note, the ends being higher on his words. The Joker was asking to exchange two cards for two more from the deck. Suddenly looking up at her, he cocked his head. "Puh-leeease?" He smiled, something that the devil himself would die from looking at.

Scowling, Rachel felt tempted yet again to perform the literal act that he had requested, yet she once again refrained and tossed him two other cards. "I hope you choke on those" she begrudgingly added.

He playfully took one card and held it beside his mouth as he popped his jaw open. "Om nom nom…ach…ach..." The Joker dropped his cards and grabbed his throat as he good-humoredly hit the floor with his chair toppling over. Without moving for a few seconds, he suddenly popped up, and while on his knees he began to flip what cards weren't already over. "Let's see here-uh..." While flipping them, he read off the titles. "I have a Ten of Clubs... A Six of Hearts... A Six of Spades... A Six of Clubs... And a Six of Hearts..." He cackled loudly as he placed his jaw upon the table with a blood-curling smile. "I win agaaaain...!"

"NO!" Clenching her hands into two tight fists, Rachel leapt up from her chair so that she could better inspect his hand. "This is impossible!" she screamed. "You can't be serious!" Trembling, she added, "Haven't you seen enough? I'm down to my skivvies, for God's sake!"

But then she remembered...the Joker wasn't one for pity. So much for that strategy.

The Prince chuckled lightly as he leaned back while pressing his index fingers together. "Well well, why not take off your shoes and stay awhile?" He snickered, even though he was the Joker, he did have his methods... And she was indeed wearing shoes. He wanted her to be cornered when he was finished with only a few garments left to pick. "Alright, alright, your deal once more since I went tuh-wice..." He chimed happily, her body was certainly something nice to look at, but what's so fantastic about something that one cannot _touch_?

Surprised by his 'generous' offer, Rachel calmed down considerably as she doffed her shoes and reached for the cards. Piece of cake...nothing shameful about exposing her toes, after all. She'd painted them an exceptionally nice color, and the actual process of baring them reminded her of how she'd been meaning to wear sandals more often.

Dealing out their cards, Rachel tossed the Joker his hand before flipping her own over. "A-ha!" she exclaimed in triumph. "A straight flush! Dear God, please tell me we didn't tie!"

Pouting before he even lifted the cards, the Joker sighed as he then counted his flock of sheep. "Many black sheep, aye" he murmured to himself as he rolled his head around his shoulders, then flipped over his cards. An Eight of Clubs, a Six of Diamonds, a Queen of Hearts, a Prince of Spades, and a Deuce of Diamonds. He had nothing, and there was no use in trading out, there was nothing to even try and _go _for. The Prince crossed his arms before his chest, and stared at her, waiting for her verdict.

Hardly able to contain herself, Rachel gave a triumphant "YES!", her giddy laughter ringing like bells as she jumped out of her seat and continued to laugh in his face. "Man, you are so going to get it!" she decided, grinning as she eagerly sat back down. Now nodding toward him, she sustained, "Take off your pants, please." Blushing, she then realized how eager she had sounded. "I-I mean, I don't want you to, but...y-you remember my philosophy, right?"

The Joker could not help but laugh as she danced around, and he threw himself into a greater fit as she had decided the worst thing for him to take off: his pants. The criminal followed suit and stood up, undoing the belt and dropping it next to the chair. Next he undid the button, the zipper, and then slipped the pants off and tossed them to the side. He then sat down in his seat, his body naked from his hips down to his patched socks and shoes. The Joker sat calmly with only a small smile on his face as he watched Rachel for her reaction. "Alrighty then, let's con-tinue...!" He cackled happily with a toothy smile.

Rachel's smiled was immediately wiped from her face as a wave of overwhelming embarrassment overtook her. "Oh, my God, what the hell!?" she exclaimed, immediately covering her eyes. "Why don't you wear any underpants!? Are you a complete barbarian!? I mean, I'd heard of men doing this sort of thing, but...but... Why!?"

Still refusing to look up from her hands, Rachel quivered as she tried to still the furious beating of her heart. Had he also been kind of...er...aroused? 'No, no, no' she thought, 'definitely not...besides, I'm never looking there, again!'

Meekly reaching for the deck, Rachel drew her cards before passing them to the Joker. "I...I have a Full House, again" she mumbled.

Looking down to his lap, then to her, the Joker cheerily explained, "Well, b-eau-ti-ful...since you seem so interested, I prefer to give them a little breathing room, if you know what I mean." He giggled and calmly took his hand. Clicking his tongue thoughtfully, he then tossed down three cards. "Hit me, hit me, and then hit me again."

"As much as I'd love to give you a lashing right now, I don't think I'm into kink" Rachel grumbled, her lips cracking into a nervous smile as she tried to add humor to her terrible predicament. Tossing the Joker his three cards, she sucked in a breath as she awaited the outcome. "Anything?" she asked.

Cocking an eyebrow, he inspected his cards carefully, grabbing one, then adding it to his hand. Suddenly he switched around the three cards, then added another. He once more switched his cards around, then looked at the fifth and tossed it over. "Ace of Diamonds." He took another card and dropped it onto the table. "Ace of Spades." The next card fell. "Seven of Hearts..." Then the next card fell. "Seven of Diamonds." The next card decided whether or not they tied, he won, or she lost. He tossed over a Deuce. "Deuce of Clubs."

Rachel gave the Joker a mocking pout. "Awww, well how unfortunate for you! But since you were so nice to me a while ago, you can take off your shoes. I'd kinda like to keep your shirt covering your you-know-what."

Shrugging expectantly, the Joker kicked off his shoes as his toes curled from the loss of warmth and the gain of cold concrete. A content sigh escaped him as he took the deck and shuffled, then dealt five cards each with a cackle. "Fun, fun, fun..." Looking to his cards he smiled, then looked to her. "You good or want a hit?"

"Hit me" Rachel decided, her delicate features scrunching in disgust as she looked at her awful hand. When the Joker tossed her the desired cards, she held them up to the light and winced. "Well damn" she remarked, "I've got nothing…" Laying them down so that the Joker could see, she inwardly prayed that he also had nothing…

The Joker chuckled darkly as he began to lay down a set of three and two. "I've got three fives and two sixes..." He smiled twistedly as he motioned towards her with a wavering hand. "Put your hair down, love."

Genuinely surprised by this request, Rachel slowly reached up and unfastened the clip that kept her hair neatly in place. As she did so, her locks tumbled about her shoulders in soft, chocolate waves, her breathing becoming considerably labored as she tried her best to avoid the Joker's gaze. He was making her nervous at best, but something about his very unexpected request had made her even _more_ nervous.

Not even bothering to brush her hair back from her eyes, Rachel took the deck back from the Joker and dealt themselves a new stack. As she raised her cards, she looked up at him in expectance and asked, "Need a hit?"

"No." He said it quickly without even looking at his cards and looked over to her to flip first. "The b-eau-ti-ful lady first..." He chimed happily as he motioned to her with his free hand. Tilting his head, the Joker watched her with a disgusting grace. His eyes roved over her curves, slowly following everything as his tongue occasionally popped out to lick his scarred lips. Clicking his tongue, his eyes moved back up to her own to watch the decision fate had given.

"Fine" Rachel agreed, immediately flipping the cards over. A look of confidence flashed across her features as she folded her legs, a pleased smirk gracing her lips as she revealed, "I've got an Ace of Hearts, Deuce of Spades, Three of Diamonds, Four of Spades, and Five of Hearts...I believe this is the part where I'm supposed to say 'read 'em and weep', correct?"

"Oooh, a Straight-uh..." The Joker giggled as he shifted around on his chair. He then began to flick his cards over to reveal what lay on the other side. "Hmm... Four of Clubs... Eight of Diamonds...Four of Hearts...Eight of Spades... and..." He flipped over the last card and could not help but giggle. "And a Queen... Pretty much useless, looks like I loose...again." He rolled his eyes, then licked his lips while setting his eyes back on Rachel's. "What do you want on the floor now?" He chuckled as he rattled off ideas, "My vest or my shirt? Maybe my gloves...? Or my socks?" He dared not to say one thing, but maybe she would never think of that.

Rachel couldn't help but roll her eyes. "Yes, because I'm just dying to see even more of you than you've already forced me to... But since I don't have much of a choice, I guess I'll have to go with...ummm..." She paused, making a show of her indecisiveness as she tapped a finger against her chin. "...Your shirt. At least that way you'll still have a vest over top."

As she watched the Joker with a smug look upon her features, she waited for him to follow through with her order.

Shifting, he stretched out his arms to fix the shirt sleeves, then slithered them underneath the vest through the arm holes and began to undo the buttons. Soon the long-sleeved honeycombed shirt was removed without him taking off the vest, and it was calmly discarded to his right upon the floor. "Ta-daah!" He threw his arms up with a large grin upon his face. A small giggle flowed from his lips as he waited for her to collect the cards and deal. "Next rouuund!"

Rachel sighed as she began dealing out the cards. "I don't mean to be a party pooper or anything, but this is getting kind of boring... I mean, you kidnapped me, so the least you could do is make this more interesting." As soon as the words left her mouth, Rachel immediately regretted them, her cheeks growing rosy as she hesitantly returned his gaze.

The Joker was seriously silent after Rachel spoke. The Prince was so surprised by what she had said that no laugh, chuckle, or even a giggle could escape his frame. Blinking a few times, he shifted his head slightly so that his left eye was closer to her visually. Narrowing those beady eyes like a lion upon prey, he licked his lips as a smile curled upon his face. "Okay then, since you want to make this in-ter-es-tiiiing..." he chimed out as he looked down to his cards without turning them over. "How about thissss..." he spoke lowly as he crossed his arms in front of his chest. "Whoever wins this last hand gets to do what ever they want with the other person." He smiled a yellow toothy grin as his eyes narrowed to the point of almost disappearing. "Whaddaya say?"

Rachel felt a rush of blood rise to her cheeks, her mouth gaping open like a fish as she stammered, "Well, I...I..." Glancing down at her hand, she discovered that she had a Four of a Kind. It wasn't the strongest hand, but it was strong enough to win. Feeling confident, Rachel slowly nodded before agreeing, "Yeah, um...alright." Her answer had come out choked and raspy, so she cleared her throat and slowly laid down her cards. "Four of a Kind."

The Joker narrowed his eyes as he watched the second strongest hand reveal itself in front of him. Chuckling, he couldn't help but smile and wonder what he had facedown. Sitting up, the Prince began to flip his cards over. "Let's see, let's see, let's see...I have a Seven of Hearts...a Six of Hearts...a Five of Hearts...a Four of Hearts..." What was appearing was the highest hand, a Straight Flush in the suit of Heart. Smiling darkly he peeked at the last card and could not help but throw his head back and laugh. "How in-ter-est-iiing!" He flipped the card over and revealed, "A Seven of Spades... I have a One Pair hand... the second lowest..." Closing his eyes, he nodded in defeat. "Well _Miss Dawes_... seems you have won our little game-uh..."

Rachel balked. Had she heard and seen correctly? Taking in a shuddering intake of breath, she rose from her seat before striding over toward him, her face remaining expressionless as she stonily ordered "Lean back against the table, please."

Watching her expression was rather amusing, had he honestly wanted to win? Yes and no. Who would not want to win and get to play with someone? To do_ anything_ to them? Then again, in losing... '_I get to see what she wants' _the Joker eagerly thought._ 'And by the game, I have to listen, this will prove to be interesting...' _Cocking an eyebrow high, he did not argue and stood up from the chair, then spun around. The man popped up on the table and just had to speak. "Am I getting a physical, doctor? Do I get a _lolli-pop-uh_?" Then the Prince let his arms spread out as he leaned back, holding himself up at an angel of one-hundred-and-twenty degrees. He _really _wanted to know what she had planned.

Scowling, Rachel hissed, "No, you're not getting a physical, but by the time I'm through with you, you're sure as hell going to need one!" Before the Joker could even reply, she hooked him square across the jaw, a sick satisfaction filling her soul when she saw him give a jolt of surprise. Now straddling his waist, she pinned him down onto the table before raining hit after hit on his face, her fury blinding her as she screamed, "How does it feel, you son of a bitch!? I'm not some toy, you know...how dare you kidnap me to play some vile, disgusting game!?"

The hook to his jaw sent the Joker's head flying as his arms immediately came up to guard his face. An insane cackle erupted from his mouth as she straddled him and began to beat the living piss out of him. With each hit, he only seemed to laugh and thrash harder because of it, and seemed all too much wrapped up in the enjoyment of his own pain. Or maybe it was the fact that Rachel was _beating _him with her fists, he was making this law abiding citizen crack under an innocent game of strip poker. Suddenly cold steel licked up the inside of Rachel's left thigh. His right hand had pressed the button for the blade to surge forward, the crafted edge slowly making its way along her flesh. He was pressing hard enough to slice through a few lays of skin; not enough to bleed, but hard enough to leave nasty red welts. Its touch was slow and designed, creating patterns as he inched upward with it.

Feeling a sensation of panic welling deep within her, Rachel panted as she gazed down at the Joker through her bangs, her teeth gritting as she continued to hold onto his vest. It also suddenly occurred to her that she was straddling a half-naked man, her cheeks growing hot as she felt the blade travel along her bare thigh in what felt like a caress.

"Y-you said I could do anything I wanted" she hissed, lips trembling. "I want to hit you...a deal's a deal."

The Joker laughed hard enough to choke and began to cough. A trickle of blood began to ooze from the corner of his lips. Gurgling on the blood, he swallowed and continued to laugh maniacally. His free left hand appeared before her, the leather poking her nose, but then it began to slither down her lips, chin, and slowly down her neck. Soon his finger traveled in the pit between her curving collarbone and continued further. "I am a man of my word, but our agreement did not state for the loser to lie like a wounded dog..." he purred out as he bucked his hips up, forcing the knife to press further into her thigh. "You can hit me all you want, but just remember that I _enjoy_ it..." And the heat in his loins was a testament to that.

Gasping sharply, Rachel bit back a small moan when she felt the Joker and his blade grind into her flesh, her eyes narrowing in defiance as she tried her best to show that she was not being affected by his advances. "Don't touch me" she snarled, yet she did nothing to stop his traveling hand as she felt his gloved fingers caress a pale breast. Shivering, Rachel bit at his invasive appendage when he reached back up toward her face, her hands now seizing him by either wrist as she slammed his arms on either side of his head and leaned forward so that their noses were nearly touching. "Don't. Mess. With. Me" she hissed, her eyes like fiery embers as she tried to ignore the bulge nestled longingly in between her thighs.

His hands were now being held captive over his head, he was being threatened, and yet the man just continued to giggle underneath her. "Deary, deary, that is a hard thing to dooo considering our... pre-dic-a-ment..." He purred to her as she was still close to his own face. A sinister smile creeping upon the Joker's face, he held the knife tightly as his feet repositioned themselves so that he held a grip. "By not touching you... I would need to dodge your punches...and I don't-uh think you would like that..._now would you_..?"

Furious by the Joker's insinuation, Rachel gave him yet another teeth-rattling shake before hollering, "The thought of even letting you touch me make me want to vomit, so I'd suggest you get that childish grin off your face before I wipe it off for you!" Trying to calm her nerves, she added, "And no, you're right...I wouldn't want you to move." Smacking him clear across the face, she watched with a sense of satisfaction when his head swiveled roughly to the side.

She hated him... No, she loathed him at that moment.

Chuckling, the Joker couldn't help but spring his head back to look at her. "Come on baby, hit me one more time." He snickered, then did something to really rile her up. Both of his hands slithered out of her grip as the knife was put back into his vest, and then Rachel found her back to the table. Slamming her wrists down to the table, he cracked his neck to the right then the left with a groan. His neck had taken a nasty barrage from her punches, and with every crack, a groan was admitted. "But I hafta move...Otherwise, I'd be deeead-uh."

Crying out, Rachel began to furiously struggle amidst his tight grip, but to her horror, she realized that this only succeeded in brushing against certain body parts that she did not wish to touch. Panting shallowly, Rachel glared up into his dark eyes before bucking her hips with the hopes of struggling out from beneath him, an ireful whine escaping her lips when his grip only tightened about her wrists. "Let me go!" she hollered.

Tilting his head, the Prince released her wrists with a click of his tongue, then his hands were placed behind his back as that same appendage appeared and ran along the lengths of his lips. "Anything-uh, else?" He snickered coolly as his beady eyes closed, letting his greasy green hair fall around his shadowed face.

Genuinely surprised by the Joker's acquiescence, Rachel slowly sat up and shivered as she kept her gaze firmly in her lap, her embarrassment over her near nudity causing her to cross her arms across her chest. She was fully aware that their encounter had caused the blood to rush through her body, and that in turn had made her breasts stiffen and strain against her bra. Swallowing, she decided to push her luck as she choked out, "Y-yes, I...I'd like to leave now, please."

'Please let me go' she inwardly begged, 'oh, please let me go...'

The rustle of clothing became evident as well as the clank of chain being pulled from the floor. If and when Rachel looked up, a large amount of clothing was thrown in her face. The Joker himself has just finished putting his pants back on. The vest had been removed to reveal a man who was toned and covered in various burns, bruises, cuts, and scars. The button up long-sleeved shirt soon swallowed his body as he began to button it up. Next the vest was placed back on as he then fastened it. "Does it look like I'm stoppin' ya, b-eau-ti-ful?" He chimed out with an odd tone of disappointment.

Swallowing, Rachel gazed upon him with a sudden curiosity, but she immediately forced her eyes to repel from his marred flesh. What had been the cause of all those injuries, and why did the Joker seem so intent upon acquiring them? Slowly rising to her feet, Rachel gaped at him before asking, "Y-you mean...you're really going to let me go? I mean, I thought that you...th-that we were going to..."

Blushing, Rachel immediately turned her back to him and held onto the edge of the table, her teeth gritting in frustration when she ignored the odd sensation in her gut.

The Joker cocked an eyebrow as he licked his lips. "We were going to what-uh?" He chuckled, genuinely curious as to what she thought they were going to do. A devilish smile began to creep upon his scarred face as the vest was left open to hang upon his body.

Rachel scowled. "You know perfectly well what I mean...after all, why would you invite me out here to play some stupid game if you didn't have an ulterior motive?" To Rachel's surprise, she couldn't help but feel a tad insulted that he hadn't wanted her enough to try anything.

Letting his eyebrow drop when he now knew where she was coming from, a small chuckle erupted from his lips as his hands were pushed into his pants' pockets. "Well deaaary, a game is a game... And there are rules, and I am a man of my word... Or did you forget already?" He smirked, then turned to look out the window, noticing that the sun would be rising any moment.

Rachel blinked. "Somehow I wasn't expecting you to be a man of your word...you're definitely a different type of criminal." Reaching for her blouse, the attorney slowly slipped it on before fastening it closed, her lips twisting into an odd pout as she mumbled, "Thank you... For not mistreating me." Smirking, she added, "Oh, and the beating was fun, too. I happened to really enjoy that."

A cackle escaped the Joker as she thanked him. "We were just playing a game, my dear, nothing more, nothing less... Now I suggest that you leave before the runs expire... After all, the agreement was for the rest of the night. As soon as that sun comes up, I won't be so kind and oblige to your wishes." He clicked his tongue as he arched a brow at her, with his right hand slithering out of his pocket and motioning towards the window.

A look of panic flickered across Rachel's features as he said this, her hand subconsciously straying toward her throat as she squeaked, "Y-you mean you're going to kill me?" Feeling rather small, she shakily reached for her pants as she staggered back towards the table. The feeling of camaraderie she had briefly had with the Joker was now officially gone.

The Joker covered the right side of his face with his hand as his fingertips rubbed his flesh. A legitimate sigh escaped his lips as his left hand popped up and he rubbed his face rather vigorously. Then growling through his hands with an animalistic hunger, he snapped, "Are you this flustered that you can't think properly?" Suddenly he dropped his hands, his face smothered and smeared from his touch. With a loud growl, he yelled at her, "GET OUT!" The knife was drawn and slammed into the table, the blade now completely disappeared into the wood.

With a jolt, Rachel shakily pushed past the Joker and burst through the warehouse door, her heart hammering in her chest as she realized that amidst her terror, she hadn't even bothered to put her pants back on. Leaning against the door with a groan, Rachel closed her eyes and placed a hand to her forehead. Completely unbeknownst to her, she would have disturbingly erotic fantasies about the Joker and his knife for weeks to come, her teeth biting into her lower lip as she swallowed her pride and began walking down the alley.

The clown prince let his legs buckle out as he was now sitting upon the concrete of the warehouse. Tilting his head back, he looked up at the one light with a small chuckle. "What a foolish woman... She was given all that power and only chose to punch me a few times..." He began to cackle like a madman once more as he rolled his head forward to look at the door that was slowly closing shut. "I figured-uh that a smart woman like her would have asked me to take my make-up off..." Chuckling as he cracked his neck, the Joker added, "And even when we agreed upon the rules... That they could make the other do as they wished, she still did not get it..." Sighing he cocked his head and looked at the scattered cards all over the floor and table, then his eyes fluttered to the knife. Turning, he looked to see the sun rising. "Well, I am a man of my word...Time's up!" He leaped up, ripping the knife from the table and began to pursue Rachel. "OH, MISS DAWESS!!" he snarled with wicked laughter, a malicious grin plastered upon his face as he went tearing out into the alley.

**A/N** - If you want this to be continued, you apparently have to beg, 'cause that's the only way DCCOURTJESTER said she'll continue writing...'cause she's a sadist like that. XD


	6. Another Round

**A/N** - Part 2 of "Strip Poker"

CO-WRITTEN WITH DCCOURTJESTER

"Another Round"

A sharp cackled erupted from the very lowest pit of the Joker's rotten soul as he pushed the double steel doors of the warehouse open with wide arms. Leaning forward slightly with the motion, he craned his neck much like a condor and smiled like the mad man he claimed he was not. Letting his head drop forward, his cackling slowed down to a mad gurgle of snickers. A mesh of brown and green screened his face as two raw sienna orbs shifted about hungrily, searching for the creature that their owner desired. The Joker shifted lethargically as his knife scraped against the steel door, the metallic contact screaming out much like a crow about to lay seize on a tiny mouse. A leather hand slid off the dry door as it shifted upward to push away the strands of hair from his vision. Suddenly his body jumped from the warehouse's doorframe when a loud blast of thunder surged through the air.

His giggles echoed around as rain began to pound down without mercy upon the scene unfolding below. The Joker was now no longer playing a little game of poker with his Miss Dawes, for now it was the most dangerous game of all…cat versus mouse.

The two were now in a shipping yard on the docks, and Rachel ran from the warehouse, a safe house, into the maze of crates and shipments. Erratic movements began to seize and twist the Joker's body as he popped his left shoulder and his head snapped to the right, his gaze growing devilish as he gazed around the corner of a crate. "Oh come out, come out, my little darl-liiing…" he practically sang. "Oh, Miss Daaaawes…." He continued, "It's time to play the second game-uh…" He chuckled as he skipped past another crate, gazing to his right and left to see if she had appeared.

'_If she was smart, she would be hiding and listening for me… Ready to surprise me…' _he thought.

"The Rules of this game are simple…" The Joker suddenly stopped in a cross section as he looked down at his knife. "The longer you run, the more fun the game, but the worst for your mind…The shorter you run, the worst for your body…." He rocked his head to the left, then to the right, and finally straight back as he looked up to the sky. "Or…just long enough to make us both en-joy it." A yellowed smile crept up upon his features as he called out to her.

Shifting his footing, the paint upon the Joker's face began to run, and the white was shifting to grey and pink while the black and red were running thin. Turning his eyes as he flipped his body around to look behind him, he ran his tongue along his lips. His frame was completely soaked to the bone, and he was truly enjoying himself, knowing damn well that he was screwing with Rachel's mind already. His adrenaline was running rampant throughout his body, and a part of this was showing within his right hand as his knife twirled around each finger. Opening up his arms suddenly, he exclaimed for her to hear, and he knew she could hear him, "Let the game begin… And here…we…_GO!"_ He roared the last word as his fingers clenched the knife.

A manic smile ripped through the Joker's features as he began to stalk through the muddy ground, his hair starting to stick to his face. His ears were burning profusely because he was trying to listen for her over the thunderclaps. What a fun game. His mind began to roll over how Rachel had left (half-naked), and his analysis deducted that she must be freezing her be-aut-i-ful little legs off…

Shivering from both fear and the cold, Rachel continued to press her body closely against a crate as she listened to the Joker croon and cackle in the distance. How quickly he had gone against his word…she knew he wasn't the type to keep any promises!

Giving a jolt of surprise when another crack of thunder sounded overhead, Rachel swallowed as she began inspecting her surroundings for something – anything – that could assist in her plight. Finding nothing but crates and tackle, the attorney gave a curse before a sudden idea came to mind.

Tiptoeing toward a box of tackle with as much stealth as she could muster, Rachel lifted the lid and reached inside before retrieving a sharp fishing hook. When the Joker called out to her again, she scowled before creeping back over toward her hiding place, the wind violently whipping her hair into her line of vision as she waited…waited.

After what felt like a lifetime, the Joker passed her with a giddy smile on his face, Rachel taking a deep breath before lunging toward him with the agility of a small cat. Seizing him by the neck from behind, she then took the hook and sliced it across the Joker's cheek, an almost warlike cry escaping her lips as she struck him with the hook again and again.

The Joker's wishes had come true; he had found her and it seemed that she would prefer to fight rather than lay idle to escape. She truly surprised him as he stumbled backward with a cackle as metal sunk into flesh. A large crimson line oozed from his pale white face, which was quickly turning into a human color. Through the momentum of Rachel leaping at him, his soaked back bit into steel behind him as he was now pressed against a container within the shipyard. Rachel herself was before him with a large hook covered in his own blood. His eyes were wide as they stared at her; they were not shocked with fear, but with eagerness. A bloody gurgle of laughter was erupting from him as he tongued the wound upon his face. He would feel his tongue slip through the slice and could not help but laugh even more.

"Never knew you liked to play it rough and _harsh, _Miss Dawes…" Even though the Joker was the pinned one, cold steel ran hungrily along Rachel's cooled flesh. He pushed hard enough for her skin to indent and for her panties to fall to the muddy ground as he cut them off. Large sienna eyes gazed down at her with manic pleasure as the tide for power seemed to shift back and forth. The knife was lethargically dragged along her flesh up until he pushed the tip of the blade into her bellybutton; enough to scare and cause a tiny cut.

Her mouth wordlessly opening and closing amidst her horror, Rachel gaped back at the Joker as his scarred grin seemed to stretch upon noting her fear. Feeling utterly humiliated, Rachel clenched the hook tighter amidst her grasp as she felt the blade continue to do its damage, her eyes narrowing as she suddenly lunged backward so as to escape any further injury.

Panting with adrenaline, Rachel moved to run around him, but released a shriek when she felt his gloved hand clasp about her arm.

Indeed, leathered hands cascaded around her wrist as the Joker swung her around, his lips brushing against her right ear as he whispered, "Now, now, where do you think you're going?" He giggled as a smidgen of blood began to roll down the corner of his scarred lips. Through the momentum, he pinned her facing the metal container. The knife was still contained in his right hand, but that was now pressed against her skull with a large fist full of hair along with it. The left was holding onto her wrist, pinning her arm behind her back. Slowly leaning back, he examined her body from her shoulders down her to her back, buttocks, and legs. An accepting whistle escaped his lips as he leaned in to whisper into her ear. "Now, now, do I have to break one of the prett-y bones in this..._wonderful _body of yours?" he purred as he dragged his bloodstained tongue over her ear as he nibbled upon it afterward. He exemplified his words by twisting her left arm up further.

Giving a cry, Rachel felt tears burning along her lashes as she promptly stomped on his foot, her anger monumental as she shrieked, "Let go of me, you bastard! I don't have anything you want, and I know you don't have anything I want, so just let me go!"

The Joker was silent as his right hand released her and slowly pushed back his hair; he did not laugh at his foot being stomped. With the Joker, pain meant fun, and he wasn't laughing at the moment. Pressing against her, a wave of heat attacked her body as his own unintentionally shielded her from the cold rain. Letting his right arm fall down straight, the blade was tapped upon her right thigh. He soon grew a rhythm with his tapping as he looked around and licked his lips as if wanting to say something, thinking. Then he leaned back in and whispered, "You do have something I want, and before it seemed I did have something you wanted... Or was that you just playing an oh-so-naugh-ty game with me?"

Rachel shivered. "You mean that stupid game you forced me into playing? If you're going to try what I think you are, you can just forget it!" Struggling about, Rachel gave a yelp when she felt the Joker slam her more forcefully against the metal container. Trembling, she managed to growl out, "And will you put that stupid knife away!? One would think that you were trying to compensate for something..."

'Oh, shit' Rachel thought, 'that was SO stupid...'

"No, I am referring to that love-uh-ly statement of yours... If I do remember, you were expecting me to do something... _else_?" His tone was playful and cheerful, but still sickly twisted. As she struggled, he decided to ram her against the crate with all of his weight for her to learn how weak and helpless she was. Upon the slam, the knife was pulled away from her flesh. He was silent as he ran her derisive words through his mind over and over again; there was no giggle, no laugh, nothing. Suddenly for what seemed like a lifetime of breathing and wondering what was going to happen next, he leaned in to whisper in against her jaw line as his left hand released her arm and forced her face to shift. Leather fingers gripped her jaw rather harshly as he stared at her. His hand was there and he thrust the knife into her mouth, pressing hard against her cheek. "Deary, would you mind saying that again?" The Joker's left hand released her face and he spun her so that her back burrowed into the metal. Next came his right knee which slammed against her legs to separate them as he drew closer, sandwiching her body to the crate. His left hand arose once more to stroke her right cheek. "I don't think I heard you." He was whispering, and he never whispered.

Trembling, Rachel winced as she felt the cold metal cut into the side of her mouth, her own blood pervading her senses with its coppery flavor. With a shuddery intake of breath, she choked out, "I...I'm sorry." She sounded so pitiful saying it, but she truly didn't want to be found dead and half-naked. In the long run, she knew that getting on the Joker's good side would benefit her far better than her other option.

Not daring to move, she hopefully added, "C-can we pretend I never thought you were going to...to take advantage of me? Because I'm sure that we both have places we'd much rather be right now opposed to being soaking wet in the rain..."

Rachel knew that she was pushing her luck, but she had to at least try.

If it was even possible, the Joker drew closer to the point of suffocating her with his entire being. The knife bit further into her mouth after her pitiful display of fear consumed her, and her survival instincts kicked in to please rather then to anger. Tilting his head slightly, he appeared as if he were examining a piece of art and just now noticing that there was a scratch on it; a scratch upon a million dollar piece that he once thought was absolutely perfect.

Tilting his head the opposite way, his lips brushed against Rachel's as he spoke, "Is it the scars…? Are they bothering you? Is that the problem?" Slowly letting his head creak to the opposite side of the spectrum, he lazily gazed at her with glazed eyes. "Are you…" His voice was horribly kind, soft, and eerily caring that clearly had an undertone of sociological problems. Suddenly his voice erupted into a loud roar, "…AFRAID?!" he snarled, baring his yellow fangs before her face, and his dark sienna eyes cracked into tiny slits. Letting his tongue slither over his lips, he watched her reaction, gauging it. The intentions of before were quickly fading away as his brain snapped over into maim and kill mode.

Shifting the knife slightly so as to start a new tiny cut, he licked his lips again as if thinking of what to say. "My mask is gone…what do you think of the man before you?" he asked coldly, a tone demanding an honest answer. The Joker's facial mask had completely run off, his flesh color clearly visible with a red tint to his scars and his eye sockets were a shade darker from the paint. The Joker's jaw clenched as he waited, and due to the impatience of his question, the knife bit once more into the edge of her lip.

Gazing up at him in utter astonishment, Rachel felt her knees quiver violently as she tried her damndest to stay on her feet. She was cold, tired, and frightened out of her wits, but not because of the Joker's suggestions. Moaning slightly at the pain from the knife, Rachel shuddered when the rain began to coalesce with her blood and paint her chin a diluted pink.

Glaring up at him, Rachel found that most of her malice couldn't be channeled toward this new man...this stranger, because he wasn't the face she was used to. He was...almost disarming, and that's what alarmed her the most.

Careful to avoid the knife as she spoke, Rachel's gaze softened as she returned, "No, I'm not afraid...I can't be afraid of a man I've never met."

The response was cryptic and most likely not what the Joker was looking for, but Rachel felt that it was the safest reply she could offer. In all honesty, she wasn't sure how she felt about his new appearance. Deep within a dull ache formed inside her heart, for she now knew that he had once been remotely attractive. To have your face marred for God knows what reason was positively horrifying...

The edges of the Joker's lips twitched as a small snort escaped him, his head leaning in to press against the crate by the side of her head. Narrowing his eyes towards her through his net of wet hair, he whispered to her ear, "You are the first to ever say that-uh..." He clicked his tongue afterward, the knife was withdrawn from her mouth and at the end of his sentence, Rachel found her last piece of cloth protection fall to the ground. The knife had sliced through the straps of her bra as he ran it along her collarbone, then into the dip, and finally trailing onto the other bone. His left hand was snaking behind her back with his gloved digits resting upon her left hip.

Shifting his head back with his nose in the air, he stared down at her, then swiveled his head so that it was tilted right before her own. "I won't kill you...That would be too boring, you should have realized this by now..." The knife was brought up to tap her upon the nose ever so slightly so as not to cut her. Chuckling suddenly, he felt her shivers from the cold and moved the blade, pulling her body away from the cold crate to instead be pressed against a warm, soaked sociopath that had a fetish for knives. "I just want to play with someone who is interesting..."

Still shivering, Rachel found that she was frozen with shock and disgust. "How can I possibly interest you?" she irefully demanded. "I'm nothing like you, and...and I hate all that you stand for!"

Teeth chattering, the attorney cursed as the thick droplets of rain began to fall down upon them harder and faster, a small moan of discontent escaping her lips as the water streamed down over her shoulders, erect breasts, stomach, and back.

The Joker's left arm curled further to press her into him as his right hand slithered through her hair, pushing it away from her face. Then a shocking surprise blew up in Rachel's face as his lips captured her own in a rather passionate kiss, his tongue snaking around, attempting to entice the other dancer to waltz with him. The coppery taste of her blood mixing with his own amused him as well as turned him on even further. His arms suddenly left the side of her face and waist, rather taking hold of her wrists and pinning them above her head. A piece of hanging chain was used to bind her hands as he kicked up the hook and caught it with his right. The left hand held the chain as he jammed the massive hook into the links as a makeshift lock.

Leaning back down to her face, he giggled. "Opposites attract, and if I may say, you do attract-uh..."

Still tasting their coppery-flavored blood on her tongue, Rachel panted in fear as she began squirming amidst her bindings, her eyes like blue electric ice as she stared him down in outrage. "Let me go, you monster!" she shrieked, her bosoms heaving as she gave yet another tug at the chains. "If you don't, you know damn well that Harvey will come after you!"

Although the threat was rather hollow, Rachel was beyond desperate, the rain matting her hair to her face as she gazed up at him with pleading eyes. Before she could further beg with him to spare her, Rachel's mind went reeling as the Joker pinched her nerves and sent her into a state of unconsciousness. The world began to fade into darkness as a silhouetted figure stood before her with the rising sun behind him. What she didn't see was the wicked smile upon the unmasked man. Just as her world went black, a murmuring began to twist and wrap around her ears. Her body felt extremely heavy as if she were made from solid iron, and even her eyelids chose not to move as her hearing began to increase. The murmurs were turning into words here and there, but the entirety of what was being said faded away as everything grew silent once more.

The next stage of awareness kicked in as her ears began to burn with a calm voice speaking, and a familiar one talking back in a panicked but relieved tone. Her body no longer felt so heavy, and when she opened her eyes, she found that her world was extremely blurry. Within seconds, her vision cleared to see a man in a white lab coat speaking with none other than Harvey Dent. The DA looked like he hadn't slept in days due to the large black pools underneath his eyes, disheveled hair, and a tie lazily thrown over his shoulders rather then around his neck. The conversation was about her health it seemed, and from what she gathered from the words in front of her, it was rather shocking.

The doctor spoke calmly as he held her charts. "She's been out cold for the past three days…Miss Dawes has also been running a violent fever from being out in that horrible storm, and was on average one-hundred and six degrees. We had to put her in a frozen state or she would have died."

Harvey ran a hand over his mouth and shook his head. "Sweet Jesus...I can't thank you enough for informing me when you did. I know it's rather presumptuous, but did she say anything during her state of unconsciousness? Like a name or other indicator as to why she was outside like that?"

The doctor shook his head, "The only thing she has said was nothing short of babble... They were not words, that is in English they weren't... Her face was cut up slightly, and there were a few cuts upon her body along with numerous bruises and lacerations. She is lucky she didn't die out in that storm... We still do not know who left her here, but she was placed on our doorstep in what clearly looked like men's clothing."

Harvey's jaw visibly tightened. "And did you give her a physical? Has she been...er...I-I mean, has she been...um...?" Finding that he could hardly associate the words with his sweet Rachel, Harvey bowed his head before lowly finishing, "Has she been violated?"

As he sat awaiting the answer, he felt himself stiffen in anticipation.

The man in the white coat shook his head. "The full physical showed no trauma, so she was not forced, if that helps any. It does look as if she were beaten around like a rag doll, though…are you two partaking in an important case right now? You may have some enemies that are attempting to terrorize you both." Stopping suddenly, he moved towards the closet where the clothing was kept. "She did have this, though..." He pulled out a small bag and handed it over to Harvey, revealing a bunch of Joker cards. "She was clutching it to her chest when we found her…it was practically crushed in her grasp." He placed his free hand into his pocket. "I honestly don't know the situation, but she could have died..." Looking over, he noticed that Rachel was awake. "Ah, Miss Dawes..." The doctor moved towards her calmly and slowly, "You are in Gotham General...how do you feel?" He sat down on a swivel chair next to her.

Blinking up at the older man in bewilderment, Rachel parted her chapped lips before giving a soft groan, her bleary eyes coming into focus as she rasped out, "I...I feel fine... How did I get here? Where...where is he?"

"Where's who, Rachel? Who's harmed you!?" Harvey demanded, his eyes ablaze as he came to her side.

Refusing to answer, Rachel pulled the covers up to her chin and glanced about her with wide, terrified eyes.

The doctor sighed, raising a hand to Harvey. "Please calm yourself Mr. Dent…from the looks of her body, she has been through enough hostility. Now…" Turning his gaze back down to Rachel, he continued, "Miss Dawes, your beloved Mr. Dent is here, and I am Doctor Jean Giullare...can you think back to the last thing that you remember? Maybe how you got out in the rain? Or how you got these wounds?"

Blushing at the memory, Rachel promptly shook her head. To admit to her fiancé and some man she'd never met that she was playing strip poker, of all things, and with a demented clown, of all people, would undoubtedly cause a bunch of heads to roll. Leaning back more snugly against her pillow, she glanced back and forth between the two men before dryly rasping, "I-I'm sorry, but...I can't."

Harvey was ready to burst out crying and swinging at the first thing that decided to move in his direction. He was confused and emotionally unstable. His fiancée had disappeared for days, only to return in a near death state with him being able to do nothing. "You don't remember, Rach?" He was truly worried as he moved towards her and knelt down beside her.

The doctor scooted away. "I shall leave you two be, but please tell me when you two are finished so that I may finish my report." Jean left quickly, leaving the two to be alone.

When the doctor was fully out of sight, Rachel quickly shook her head before confessing, "No, I-I don't...nothing at all. Not even a color or scent...not a single tangible memory comes to mind."

Harvey breathed out heavily, he knew when she was lying, even in the current state he was in. "Does this help?" He held out the Joker card within his hand, the type upon the surface reading: 'Will The Real Rachel Dawes Please Play My Game? HA HA HA HA HA.' "Or is it all just a past memory you don't want to tell me?" His voice was cracking.

Rachel began to visibly shake, tears now cutting down her cheeks in salty tracks as she whispered, "Harvey, I'm so sorry, but I can't... I mean, I don't want to tell you, and I know you won't believe me because of all the lies I've just told, but please trust me when I say that nothing happened. It was a harmless, stupid game...nothing more."

Flinching, Rachel bowed her head as she inwardly pleaded that he'd just accept her excuse without further questioning.

The card fluttered to the blankets as Harvey's hands reached forward shakily, cupping her cheeks as he forced her gently to look at him. He was crying, sheer worry spread across his face as he dropped himself upon her. His head resting upon her shoulder, he whispered, "I don't care what happened... All I care about is the fact that you are here with me. You can tell me any time, but as long as you are here, I'm happy." His arms wrapped around her frame, pulling her close to him. His entire body was quaking with gratitude to God for giving his Rachel back to him.

Rachel bit her lip as she shakily placed a hand over his head, her fingers gently stroking his hair as she felt her heart break. She couldn't quite explain it, but she felt exceptionally guilty for all the pain she'd put him through, when in actuality she hadn't even been thinking of him and his feelings.

"You should get some sleep...You need to rest alright, honey?" Harvey suggested as kissed her cheek and stood up with a weak smile. "I'm just glad I have you back..." He leaned over and placed a small peck on her lips. "Get some rest, okay?"

Rachel miserably nodded. "Yeah, alright...stay close by though, will you? I'd like to think you'll be there if I need you around."

"Anything for you, Rachel." He smiled as he kissed her forehead. "Call me, and I will be here that second" he murmured, then began walking backwards towards the door. He feared that if he turned around that she would disappear, and when he did turn around, he felt dread.

Smiling a reassuring smile, Rachel then snuggled back against the pillows and closed her eyes as she listened to Harvey's soft footfalls as they gradually carried him away from her.

Several moments passed, and with each agonizing stroke of the clock, Rachel began to feel more and more distressed. She couldn't quite put her finger on it, but something about the hospital was causing her to feel a great sense of unease...

Night soon fell, and throughout the evening nurses came in to check on her for tests, general welfare, and to feed her. When darkness consumed the outside world, the hospital drew a disturbing silence, especially in the ward that Rachel was currently residing. Down the hall was a waiting room with various objects inside: a TV or two, various chairs, and even an old piano in the far corner of the room. The moon shown brightly as it beamed cheerfully down upon Rachel's room, giving it an interesting glow as the sound of a piano playing began to echo down the hall. The melody was sadistically solemn as a familiar voice began to sing an accompaniment with the sorrowful piece.

"What makes you think that it'll all work out in the end? Afraid to feel bad? Better off to try and pretend. I'm immortal, immune to all that is wrong….Just keep on wishing. Crossing my fingers. so long. Is this helping? I'm growing weaker each day. Can't stop whining. Still afraid of what I might say or reactions, that control us one and all….It's mine, it's pure and as decent as I can make myself. Inside, we all know, only the strong survive…." The Joker's fingers delicately danced upon the ebony and ivory keys, his eyes closed as he bobbed his head from left to right with the rhythm.

"Why don't you think about that? So now I'm bleeding on myself, yes once again. Seems I trusted another deceitful friend. My fault. should've known the deal. Keep your friends close, but your enemies closer, for real. Seems easy, but nothing could be so hard. Trying to guess life's dealing. What's the next card? I'm surely folding….I don't like this hand at all." The Joker continued the melody with his left hand as his right hand came up to flip a few cards that were laid out across the top of the closed piano. The cards were set out in solitaire style. Then his right hand floated back down to the piano as he continued,

"It's mine, it's pure and as decent as I can make myself. Inside, we all know, only the strong survive…Keep those eyes wide open, here comes a blind side….Maybe things happen for a reason and wherein lies the answer. To overcome the grieving of life's unruly lessons. I'm handed in succession. It builds my pain which makes me strong….It's mine, it's pure and as decent as I can make myself. Inside, we all know, only the strong survive….You will survive…I will survive…We will survive…" His fingers continued to play with the keys as he drew out the melancholy song, his voice fit too perfectly to the melody as if actions were taking from life situations. Tsking suddenly, he licked his lips as he looked down at the keys. "You are horribly…horribly out of tune" he muttered with a giggle as he fixed the doctor's coat around his shoulders. He had shanked a doctor, who lay in a bloody pile with his throat slit in a closet.

Clutching at her sheets, Rachel slowly sat up in bed as if trying to decipher the eerie melody and voice, but to her disappointment, she found that the song had stopped nearly as soon as it had begun.

"Strange" she remarked, her brows furrowing as she leaned back to her rightful position. "Must've been an orderly..."

Suddenly the sounds of footsteps nearing echoed throughout the hallway as the doctor appeared. Leaning against the doorframe, his hands lazily grabbed the clipboard and held it in front of his face. "Hmm...how in-ter-es-ting..." He tsked as he read her report. "So they had to put you on ice, huh, bea-u-ti-ful?" He grinned as he flipped through the documents, then placed them back in their clear plastic container. His bare hands were then thrust into his pockets as he leaned upon the frame. The Joker was before her, dressed as a doctor, and there was a nice sized smear of blood across the left shoulder that was well worth noting. "So how are you feeling, hmm?" he asked as he tilted his head, cracking his neck as he moved towards her.

"You!" Rachel hissed, the anger evident upon her face as she scrambled to get out of her covers. To her dismay, she was attached to an IV and this prevented her from making a swift escape, a pained shriek escaping her lips as she tore the needle out of her arm and fell to the floor. Glancing up at the Joker in horror, she demanded, "W-what do you want from me now? My God, haven't you already done enough!?"

Slowly closing the glass door with a cheerful hum, the Joker couldn't help but smile at the situation. "You may want to, uh...close your gown before I get aroused-uh" he purred to her as he motioned towards her rather delectable rear mooning the world. As he turned around after closing the door, he moved over and crouched down in front of her, a frown forming upon his face as he was clearly faking empathy. "I was worried about you, and I wanted to see how you were doing...can't a guy do that?"

Rachel snorted, her body hurriedly flipping over to cover her sudden nudity. Scowling, she snapped "Don't make me laugh! If you really cared, you wouldn't have knocked me unconscious in the first place, you monster!" Now scooting a tad further away from him, she hissed, "I can get security in here in a heartbeat, if need be, so you'd better watch yourself!"

The Joker giggled as he showed her his empty hands. "You were running a fever, you could not see your face, but I could. You were as red as a cherry, and you cuh-learly told me that you held no attraction to me...so I took it up as a fever, and when I kissed you, I cleared that assumption. In fact it was a fever, and hence why you were brought here. Like I told you, if I had wanted to kill you Miss Dawesss, I would have done so long ago."

Rachel was tempted to laugh. "What, so your explanation for kissing me was to prove that I had a fever? Why didn't you just use your hand like any other normal human being?" Frowning, she begrudgingly admitted, "But you did leave me here, so I guess...um...I guess I should be grateful in some sick, twisted way." Smirking, she added, "At first I thought you were going to say you thought I was ill since I didn't find you attractive... I never said that I found you unattractive, but...ok, scratch that. I abhor you."

The Joker giggled as he placed his chin atop of his fists. "Ooohhh..." He cooed like a child, "Now you abhor me? How cruuuel..." He snickered then opened his eyes. "In all seriousness, I did come here to see how you were faring...I was wondering if I'd inadvertently killed you..." He was dead serious; he wasn't laughing, nor was he yanking her chain. His sienna eyes stared over at her as he watched her. Even if she hated him, he would help her if she needed it, and he would make her love him at any cost...even if it meant a pseudo-death.

Rachel blinked. "You can't be serious..." And yet, to her astonishment, she could see that he was, her cheeks growing rosy as she suddenly found herself uncomfortable beneath his probing stare. "Thank you...I guess" she fumbled, her hand now rubbing at her arm as she noticed that he was still a little too close to her body for comfort. "Now that you see I'm ok, do you need any further confirmation? Like...do I need to do a handstand or rub my stomach while patting my head?"

The Joker narrowed his eyes at her then completely closed them as he giggled. There was a loud smack, and Rachel knew the one object...or rather _objects,_ that made that noise. "I propose a game" he purred to her as he pointed down to the deck of cards he'd just dropped to the floor between them. "And this one has rules you will love...and _abhor_."

Rachel blinked. "Another game of strip poker? Come on, be more original...I've only got a gown on! You'd win for sure!"

The Joker giggled as she assumed it was strip poker. "I just told you darrrling..." He brought up his right index finger as he shook it from side to side as if scolding her for a moment of blondeness. "Tsk tsk" He clicked his tongue then explained. "Poker yes, but not strip poker...that is unless you want it to be... The rules are easy. Win a hand, and you make the other do one thing, no matter what it is, to the exception of stopping this game. Win three times in the row, and you can declare the game over, and dismiss me into the shadows to never see or hear from me again." He tilted his head, "But remember that I have the same power, so if I win, you have to do something that I want you to dooo… And if I win three times in a row...well...if it happens, I will tell you."

Rachel balked. "You mean it? You'll really go if I win three times?" Despite the fact that she was fairly terrible at playing cards, she had to admit that the prospect of this game was disturbingly thrilling. Perhaps it was the fact that she was playing with a madman, but whatever it was, she nodded before urging, "Alright, deal 'em out."

He smiled. '_Oh deary deary deary...The cat shouldn't play with curiousity, for curiousity kills Cat...' _he thought while dealing out the cards. "Alright, m'dear, since I dealt, show me whatcha got."

Holding up her hand so that she could assess them, Rachel frowned as she chewed on the inside of her cheek, her face growing hot as she discovered that she had a queen, three fives, and a Jack. Great…

Swallowing, the attorney placed the cards down onto the floor in defeat, her shoulders squaring as she uneasily asked, "W-what do you have?"

'Please let it be worse than mine' she inwardly prayed, 'oh, please let it be worse than mine!'

Both eyebrows shot up as he crouched before her, looking down at her hand. For just dealing out, she was running with a Three of a Kind; it wasn't horrible, but then again it wasn't a safe guard either. Looking to his cards within his hand, he placed a thoughtful pout upon his face as his left hand began to fiddle and curl a strand of his greasy green-brown locks.

Tsking he threw down two cards face down and drew out two more and licked his lips with a quirked brow. Disappointing? Or interesting? he thought to himself  
as he laid out his cards. His hands consisted of two fours, a ten, a seven, and a deuce. He had a One Pair, a hand lower then hers. "...You win this round-uh" he purred, then arched a brow even higher. "What will it be?" asked as he tilted his head, letting his chin fall upon his fists once more.

Clapping her hands due to the unexpected pleasure, Rachel quickly recomposed herself before leaning back with a smug look on her face. "Uhh, why don't you tell me something about yourself? Liiike your real name? I doubt you were born with the ridiculous title 'The Joker'"

Running his tongue against his cheek, tiny mountains began to appear as he pressed rather hard and began to swirl it around his mouth. He gazed away from her, letting his eyes drift of into that all encompassing space that seems to attract the bored or thoughtful. Tsking at the end, it seemed he actually had to think back to what his name was, or maybe yet, the things that his name had been connected to. Without moving, his eyes shifted back towards Rachel and arched both brows. "Rules are rules" he murmured with a few more clicks of his tongue. "My name is Jack, Miss Dawes... Nothing foreign, nothing special...just plain ol' Jack."

"It may be more ordinary than I was expecting" Rachel admitted, "but it's a nice name...suits you somehow. Probably because both of your titles can be found in a deck of cards." Studying his face, she smirked before adding, "But there's yet another pattern I've noticed...Joker and Jack both start with a "J", so either that really is your name, or you just have an affinity for surnames that begin with that letter. Either way, I just might have to start calling you Mr. J."

Now re-dealing the cards, Rachel found herself growing surprisingly comfortable as she asked, "Whaddaya have?"

The Joker growled at the 'Mr. J' suggestion and could not help but scoff as she said his name so carelessly. While rolling his tongue over his teeth, he picked up his cards and refused to smile. "Something you can't beat" he said calmly, then flipped the cards with a cackle. "I have a straight-uh flush, darrrrling." He laid out a flush that ran seven, eight, nine, ten, and a Jack of Diamonds.

The comfort that had once held her in its sweet embrace suddenly let go, her body entering a state of panic as she fell into the cruel arms of fate. Swallowing, Rachel cursed repeatedly inside her head as she laid down her useless cards, her gaze refusing to meet with his as she choked out, "W-what do you want me to do?"

Running his finger over the large slice upon his face, the Joker unconsciously followed the self-performed stitching of the hook wound. It twisted his face further, and it made him look like he was smiling a hell of a lot more on the one side of his face then the other. Closing his eyes, he thought for a few seconds, still crouching. His chin rested only on one fist now, then his eyes popped open as he darkly gazed over towards Rachel. A giggle escaped him as he clapped his hands together. "I know what I want you to do Miss Daaawes..." he purred with a yellow grin following soon after. "...I would like to know if you feel guilty from last night. I know you've seen Harvey-boy..."

Somehow this question caused Rachel to give a sigh of relief. "Is that all?" Shrugging, she returned, "Well yes, I suppose I do...I mean, I honestly didn't even think of his feelings until I saw him cry. Perhaps that's selfish of me, but it's not like I did anything with you but try and defend myself." As she watched him deal out their new hand, she winced as she asked, "Does it hurt? Um...the hook wound, I mean. Since you're here, you might as well see a doctor to check for an infection."

Avoiding his gaze, she reached for her cards and scowled when she saw her hand.

A series of cackles escaped the Joker as he shook his head rather violently. "I know how to deal with wounds-uh... It may look bad stitch-wise, but it does well." As he rearranged his cards, he looked over to her. "Laying them down, or are you gonna go for a hit, m'dear?"

"I'd better go for a hit, although I doubt that'll do much good" Rachel grumbled, immediately trading the cards for the offered ones. Now looking up at him with a scornful eye, she added rather sardonically, "And yeah, you really know how to take care of your wounds...lemme guess, your cheshire grin was a stitch-job of yours, too?" Rolling her eyes, she grumbled to herself as she laid down her worthless hand. "A five, two twos, a nine, and a Jack. Great."

Arching a brow at her horrible hand, and by horrible hand, it was meant as an explosive that does not want to blow up. Rocking over his cards, the Joker motioned down towards a flush. "Running Ace of Clubs, Three of Clubs, Seven of Clubs, Queen of Clubs, and the King of Clubs" he purred with a smile and blew her a kiss at the comment about his 'cheshire grin'.

Rachel's teeth gritted into a deep-set scowl full of frustration. "Quit with the wise-cracks, you clown! Er...shut up, you know what I mean!" Fuming, she seethed, "What do you want me to do now?"

Tilting his head, he listened to her fuming and could not help but giggle at her aggravation. "My dear Miss Dawes, do not fret... I am not as evil as people make me out to be." Absent mindedly looking away from her, he hummed a tune to himself. Finally plopping his rear on the floor, he sat Indian style as he scooted closer to her before leaning in. Tilting his head he arched a brow before asking, "In your heart, who do you looove?"

Raising a brow, Rachel demanded, "And why do you want to know? What is this, Sweet Valley High?" When the Joker gave her a penetrating look, she sighed before agreeing, "Alright, alright, fair's fair, but in all seriousness, I don't have an answer for you. Not one that I could consider the whole truth, anyway. I'm kind of a…er, loner, I guess. I love, but not in the traditional sense." Shrugging, she mumbled, "Sorry, but I guess I never really thought about it before..."

Now looking up at the Joker with a wry smile, she added, "And now that I've spilt my heart and soul onto the floor, I think it's time to deal again so I can get you back for such a ridiculous question."

He shrugged and handed her the cards. "Your deal, love" he purred with a lick of his lips. Leaning back, he watched as the cards appeared face down before them, the anticipation raised. If he won this round, his decree lasted forever... It seemed that Rachel had forgotten about that.

Rather annoyed by his pet name for her, the attorney flipped over her cards before giving a small smile. "Three of a Kind" she announced, now laying them face-down with a pleased gleam in her blue eyes. "I believe I might've just won this round."

"Honey..." The Joker murmured as he pointed to her cards, "You do realize that a Three of a Kind has five tiers of hands higher than it? And you do realize that if I win, what I ask you must do till you die, yes?"

Rachel felt her cheeks grow hot. "W-well, I...I thought that perhaps your luck had finally run out" she insisted, not wanting to appear like a fool. Chewing on the inside of her lip, she nodded once before agreeing, "And yes, I understand that, but...but you're not going to win." Suddenly a look of determination crossed her features, and she almost seemed to be daring him to contradict her.

Arching a brow high, the Joker chuckled. "Oh really, darrrrling?" he purred as he licked his lips. He flipped over his hand to reveal triplet set of fours, and two fives; her hand was higher due to her higher tiered cards. Chuckling as he looked down, he then looked over to her and smiled darkly. "You won this round-uh."

Rachel scowled. "Wait a minute, I thought we were only playing one round...that if I won three times, you'd leave and never come back."

"You did not listen to me, dar-ling...The rules were if you won three times in a row, I would leave you be...You ran face first into the game without think-ing..." he chimed out as he rose an index figure, scolding her for her brashness and eagerness.

Scowling, Rachel pouted before grumbling, "Alright, alright, fine, but I still think I'll remain the victor...winning's always come rather naturally to me, as you already know." Now smirking, she added, "And since you asked such a sappy question, it's only fair if I ask the same...who do you love, Joker? Or is the great clown prince of crime even capable of love?"

"You have asked two questions, which do you prefer me to answer suh-weet cheeks?" he murmured as he placed his feet upon the floor, letting his elbows rest on top of his knee caps. Both hands rested lazily as his fingers twiddled as if twirling something invisible.

Rachel twisted her lips. "The first one, of course...I was merely elaborating." Although she was completely apathetic on the outside, she had to admit that she was intrigued by the Joker's potential answer.

"Does the Clown Prince of Crime love?" He giggled as he lurched backwards and slapped one of his knees. After the giggling fit subsided, he suddenly threw himself forward into her face with wide eyes. He began to whisper to her, "You really want to know?" He motioned for her to move closer. "C'mere..."

Blinking, Rachel found herself easing slightly nearer despite her better judgement. She was intrigued since she genuinely believed that he would tell her a secret...something he'd never let a single soul hear before.

The Joker looked to the left, then to the right, then back to the left once more as if to make sure no one was in the room with them. Even the dust wasn't allowed to hear as he leaned in and whispered into Rachel's ear, cupping it. "I...love..." He jumped back throwing his arms up in the air as he hollered, "BATSY!" He gave a maniac giggle as he fell upon his back, kicking and howling with laughter. When he was finished, he suddenly stopped dead, laying there as if a corpse. "...In all honesty...The only person I have ever loved-uh...and I assume you refer not to maternal nor paternal love, but rather the other, I can honestly say that I'm in-fat-u-ate-ed with a certain person...I don't know if it is, love-uh." He slowly sat up, tilting his head with a cackle. "It should be obvious that it's youuu" he purred as he pointed to Rachel. "Happy now?"

Rachel had been quite close to kicking him for his joke, but now her face was a bright shade of pink as she clutched at the folds of her hospital gown. "M-me?" she squeaked, suddenly feeling dizzy, "But why? I-I hate you!"

And yet she didn't...despite how uncomfortable he made her feel, she'd felt a certain camaraderie during their silly little game.

Keeping her eyes glued firmly to the floor, she muttered to herself as she pushed him the cards. "Deal them, please..."

The Joker noted her change of tone as well as her reaction, and inside of him a black smile began to unfurl as the gears started to turn. While dealing out the cards, he giggled. "You are up one to nothing... Next round." He picked up his hand, then exchanged four out of the five for four new ones, then looked over to her. "Hit?"

"Yes, please" she grumbled, clearly displeased with her current set of cards. After exchanging them, she sat back and observed her hand with a disgusted tsk. "Umm, I've got two sixes, a two, an eight, and a King…a completely shitty hand." Wincing, she added, "What should I do? And please tell me it's something easy like telling you my middle name..."

The Joker dropped his hands with a small scowl, then a giggle purred from his lips. He was excited about what the other would make him due over the loss of a perfect chance of terrorizing the poor woman before him. "I've got only high cards...it is still lower then a two pair, you win again... You are up two to nothing...what is my punish-ment-uh?"

Rachel blinked in astonishment. "You mean...I won? Like, really?" When the Joker nodded, she gave a squeal of delight, her arms subconsciously hugging herself as she realized that she was one step closer to freedom. Now recomposing herself, she grinned before urging, "Tell me when you had your first kiss...that's always an embarrassing story with men, so I figured I'd see your side of it. And let me guess, you didn't get kissed until you were twenty-five?"

Suddenly throwing his head back while supporting himself with his arms behind his back, the Joker arched a brow as he thought. Slithering his tongue across his lips as irritation started to grow upon his face, he slowly pulled himself up so that he was in the Indian position again. He just stared over at her rather before returning rather quietly, "...Five."

Rachel raised an eyebrow. "Five? Good God, you're such a man-whore! I at least waited until the blossoming age of thirteen...yeesh!" Dealing out the cards, she smirked while asking, "Well did you at least like it, or am I not allowed to know? I'll bet you were a terrible kisser."

Holding up her cards, she groaned and smacked her forehead. "Not another Three of a Kind..."

The Joker arched a brow as he cracked his jaw by forcefully dropping it. He was irritated, but why? What she had made him think about? Glaring down at the cards, he shook his head at her questions. "My past is the past and exactly that; you don't really want to go there, Miss Dawes. Someone as..._righteous_ as you wouldn't like it-uh."

Rachel snorted. "Righteous? Me? Look Clown Boy, if you knew some of my own past, you'd know I was anything but righteous." Smirking at the memories, she asked, "So what do you have? Preferably a losing hand, of course."

He didn't bother looking at his cards and just flipped his wrist around, letting the cards fall where they fell. Gazing down at them irritably, he cocked a brow with a sly smile plastered upon his face. "...I've got a Four of a Kind... Four Burger Kings to be exact, and a Bitch of a Heart… A Queen, that is."

Rachel chewed on her lower lip. "Shit...well ok then, what lame question are you going to make me answer now? When my first time was? If it was as magical as in the story books?"

Staring at her, the Joker propped his elbow up on his left knee as his head tilted onto his open palm. Shifting his sienna orbs over towards her, he took her questions in and then spoke. "Kiss me."

"What!?" Feeling the blood rush to her head, Rachel felt the sudden urge to slap the goon for requesting something so out of bounds. Practically seething, she took him roughly by the lapels of his doctor's suit and snarled, "I hope this ends up being the worst kiss you've ever had, 'cause it sure as hell is gonna be mine!"

With one last indignant scowl in his direction, Rachel pulled him in for a surprisingly brutal kiss. Her intense anger was in part to thank for this, but she also believed that their first kiss should be as rough and electrically-charged as their fights.

Listening to her problems with his request, the Joker was about to open his mouth when he was roughly grabbed, pulled, and attacked by the brutal and rather angry Rachel Dawes. Snapping from the surprise, Rachel found that he returned the favor in equal brutality. His arms immediately snaked around her waist, reeling her body against his as his tongue battled with her own for supremacy. Contrary to what Rachel thought, the Joker being a horrible kisser turned out to be quite false.

Squirming amidst his embrace, Rachel tried to free herself, but she found that the Joker's arms were keeping her pressed flush against his solid form. Whimpering, she tried to push him over onto his side, but she found that this only succeeded in bringing her down onto the tile floor with him. Feeling his tongue slip past her lips, Rachel shivered as an undeniable pull began to flare within her loins. Repulsed and completely embarrassed, she pulled her lips away from his before panting, "Stop...please."

From her jerking and shifting, the cards scatted around the floor as the Joker laid down upon them. Arching a brow as he stared up at the woman upon him. "Was it that horrible?" he questioned darkly, mocking her statement from before and yet his arms did not release her just yet. Shifting his eyes slightly, he looked to his right to see a few of the cards scattered upon the floor. "Hmm..." Then he looked back up at her, waiting for her answer. "Answer honestly." He murmured with an evil cackle.

"Sorry, but you only get one request" Rachel snarled, her cheeks still a delightful shade of rouge. "I'm not required to answer that, so I'd suggest you get that high school locker room grin off your face before I wipe it off for you!"

Feeling her insides quiver with her frayed nerves, she bit her lip as she inwardly promised herself that she would never tell him the truth.

"Fine, collect the cards...it's your deal." He purred up to her, not releasing her waist. '_She can deal while sitting on me, good enough'_ he cackled to himself as he writhed slightly underneath her with glee.

"Stop that!" Rachel shrieked, fighting off a small whine as she felt him brush against her already stimulated nub. "How the hell can I deal if you won't stop moving!?"

Shaking as she dealt out the cards, she lifted her hand up to her face before taking in a deep breath. "I've got...um...nothing. How 'bout you?"

The Joker fanned out his cards with one hand while his right was firmly upon her waist, keeping her where she was. Arching a brow from behind the cards as he lay flat on his back, he purred, "You've got nothing...I've got something." He giggled with glee as he twisted his wrist to show her a Straight. "Deuce of Clubs, Three of Diamonds, Four of Spades, Five of Hearts, and Six of Clubs..." He giggled maniacally since he now had two wins on her and a request.

"Dammit!" Throwing her cards in his face, Rachel glared down at him through electrically charged eyes, her breathing now picking up in tempo as she demanded, "What the hell do you want from me now, you pervert? And it had better be something I'd be willing to do on a normal basis!"

The Joker couldn't help but writhe underneath her with wide eyes as she threw the cards in his face. Arching his back, and subsequently raising his hips, he was thrown into a fit of laughter at her anger and expression. Giggling, he laid back down upon the cold tiles and purred, "I want to know the answer to my question."

Rachel was highly tempted to tell him to "fuck off", but she knew she was bound by his stupid code of honor to answer truthfully. Twisting her lips into a disgusted pout, Rachel fidgeted uncomfortably in his lap before mumbling, "Well, it wasn't bad, if that's what you want me to say..." Glaring down at him, she added, "But you had no right to do that, because I never would've let you kiss me had it been under different circumstances!" As if to emphasize her point, she gave him a knuckle to the ribs.

A loud gasp erupted from him as the air was knocked out of him. Laying there, he just stared up at her before grumbling, "Alright, alright... I just wanted a yes or a no, so I shall take it-uh..." His arm no longer around her as he shuffled, the Joker handed her five cards. "Now, now, whatcha got, beau-ti-ful...or would you prefer to have me hit _on _you?" The 'on' was quickly added in as he didn't look to his hand.

Rachel curled her upper lip in disgust, but she shook her head. "No thanks, I've got a decent hand for once...if I win, we'll be tied." Now lying her cards down on his chest, she grinned before revealing, "Four of a Kind, Mr. J."

He twitched violently as she called him 'Mr. J' again, and for some reason he just found it irritating. "We are not tied, three in a row Miss Dawes... Thu-reee..." He purred aloud, correcting her as he flipped his cards over on top of hers. "Oooh, Four of a Kind, very high, very high… But my Straight Flush beats your Four of a Kind..." He giggled as he showed her sheer royalty in the spades. It was from Ace to ten and all faces in-between. Letting his head drop back down to the floor, he just laid there as he looked up at her. As for his request? He honestly had not expected to win.

"NO! You cheated!" Rachel shrieked, her hands grabbing at his sleeves as she began searching them for other cards. "C'mon, I know you've got to be hiding them somewhere...don't make me perform a full body search!"

"Miss Rachel Dawes...I am a man of my_ word_. I may manipulate and swerve around the bush with my logic and words, but I do not cheat-uh." The fact that she said 'full body search' made him erupt into a thrash of giggles and writhing joy.

Not finding the situation amusing in the slightest, Rachel peevishly demanded, "Alright, then what the hell do you want from me? I can't imagine what I could give you that you'd want for the rest of your life!"

The Joker couldn't help but continue laughing at her confusion and anger. After his manic laughter had subsided, he laid there quiet and tilted his head as he smiled slightly. "Give me a chance" he said calmly.

"A chance? A chance at what?" Rachel demanded. "A chance to finish your stupid little giggling fit? Because you've definitely had more than enough time to do that, and..." Suddenly comprehending his meaning, she blushed before asking, "W-well how do you propose I do that?"

"Um, Miss Dawes, I may look how I do, but I do understand what a _date_ is... And you typically start here...unless you thought I was referring to sex, 'cause how we are ain't bad for me."

Rachel balked. "A date!? You...I mean...you actually want to go out on a _date?_ Like, dressed up and living it up and having a night on the town? That doesn't sound like you... I'm more inclined to agree that I was expecting your second answer."

Ignoring the lecherous look in his eye, she added, "H-Harvey wouldn't like it..."

"The date? Oh well, thought I would try the traditional route...instead we can play around here...no one's looking.." The Joker's laughter erupted as it broke into a massive grin while he narrowed eyes. Both of his hands took hold of Rachel's hips and pushed her down so that she was over his own instead of his abdomen. Then he arched his hips up and ground hard against her with a chuckle. "Poor, poor, _poor _Harvey..."

Rachel cried out in accordance with his actions, her eyes narrowing into a glare as she wordlessly ordered him to never do that again. "This isn't very traditional" she hissed, but her voice was notably huskier. "I...ugh, stop that! Er...I would've thought that kissing and hand-holding was traditional, not dry humping on a hospital floor!"

"Well it seems now you are thinking of _Harrrvey_..." the Joker snorted aloud as he laid back down on the floor and placed his hands behind his head. "Want me to think of something else, then?" He tapped a finger to his forehead and narrowed his gaze on her as a lecherous look appeared upon his face. "The gears are _always_ turning..."

Rachel swallowed. "Since I don't like that look you're giving me, I'm going to have to say no..." Blushing, she added, "And I was not thinking of Harvey, I...um..." Shit. She should've been thinking of her boyfriend, shouldn't she? Chewing her lip, she glared down at the Joker before grumbling, "Alright, tell it to me straight...what do I have to do? I'm tired of waiting like this."

Pushing himself up, the Joker was soon standing up, holding Rachel in his arms as he deposited her onto the hospital bed with a giggle. Tapping her nose with his index finger, he smiled as he leaned in and placed a small peck and lick upon her cheek. He gave a quiet whisper with a devilish smile as he purred, "Pick you up at eight..."

**A/N** - Sorry, but she wants you to beg again... XD


	7. Ladies Night

**A/N** - CO-WRITTEN WITH JOKERLUV

Part 3; please go to my AFF account to read this in its entirety

"Ladies Night"

Checking his wristwatch, Harvey grumbled to himself as he waited for Rachel out in front of the famous restaurant, The Blue Marline Bar and Grille. Waiting for the woman of his dreams was one thing, but waiting for a woman who _clearly_ had no interest in him as of late was another. It wasn't that Harvey wanted to give up on their relationship, but every time he'd tried being remotely intimate with her, she'd turned the other cheek and feigned a headache.

With a heavy sigh, Harvey was about to turn and go inside when a lilting voice teased, "Sorry I'm late, but you know how we women are...we like to dress for a K.O."

Moving to reprimand her for being so tardy, the DA hurriedly swallowed his words the moment he laid his eyes upon her demure countenance. With warm, chestnut-brown hair, her ringlets were swept back into a bun fastened by several diamond barrettes, a few stray locks hanging loosely by her ears and framing what was truly the most beautiful face he had ever seen. Each delicate shoulder was bare, yet a large peach-colored, satin ribbon wrapped about her arms as sleeves and drifted downward into a soft backline. Right at her derriere, a gentle bustle was strategically placed, the veil-like fabric coalescing beautifully with the remaining satin and shining remarkably like the stars in the sky.

With his mouth agape, Harvey couldn't help but grin once he realized that he would be the envy of every red-blooded male within the vicinity. Holding out his arm for Rachel to accept, he eagerly led her past the tall, iron-barred door that held a glorious ballroom with gold leaf ornamentation, Brazilian brown flooring, and large, scenic windows that stretched all the way from the floor to the ceiling. This was the hallmark of the restaurant, but Harvey decided that they could always dance later; as of right now, all he wanted to do was sit Rachel down and hold her hand.

As a waiter eagerly approached them, the gentleman exclaimed, "Ah, so good of you to arrive, Mr. Dent! I am oh-so-glad that you and your charming fiancée could make it!"

As Harvey and the maitre-d' continued to converse, Rachel suddenly grew restless and touched her beau's arm. "Um, I think I need to visit the little girl's room...I'll be right back" she whispered. When Harvey distractedly gave his consent, Rachel rolled her eyes and irritably stalked off toward the equally elegant bathroom. Good _God,_ why had she agreed to come out here tonight? She felt as if she didn't belong amongst all the snobs of Gotham, let alone with Harvey since they had nothing to discuss these days. All she could think about was the Joker and how he'd been worming his way into all of her nightly fantasies.

Blushing at the remembrance of her most recent one, Rachel entered the ladies' room and pulled out a compact, her rouge lips twisting into a slight frown once she realized her make-up was smudged toward the corner of her eye. Quickly fixing it, she added a few finishing touches just as she heard the bathroom door swing open yet again. Not even bothering to look up, Rachel closed her compact and placed it back into her purse.

_'Great'_ she thought with a sigh, _'time to return to Romeo and the rest of Shakespeare's tragedy...'_

The woman who entered the bathroom eyed Rachel from the top of her silky brown locks to her long legs and straightened herself. She slid over to the sink, washed her hands, and turned her back to get some towels as Rachel glanced towards her. There was something familiar about this woman, but she couldn't quite place it. Rachel couldn't help but smile upon examining the back of the woman from her cheap red wig, the baggy flowered dress, the black spider webbed knee high stockings, and the scuffed black pumps. God, how did this woman ever get into the restaurant looking so frumpy?

Rachel was washing her hands, when all of a sudden the slovenly woman turned around and all Rachel saw was a sea of red, black, and white. One hand slipped around her slim waist and her mouth was covered by a hand that smelled musty with a hint of diesel fuel. She was forced inside a neighboring stall and heard the metal clip slip through the lock.

The woman turned around and a row of sickly yellow-stained teeth stared back at her in the form of a demented smile. It was him, the man who haunted her dreams… The Joker was pleasantly surprised when she remained silent, staring at him. He took a moment to absorb her beauty. His eyes roamed the entire length of her body, from her innocent-looking heart-shaped face to the beautiful, tight fitting dress. He wanted her, and in a bad to the bone sort of way.

He placed a hand on either side of her head and leaned in. "Good evening" he whispered.

Rachel's heart was pounding, but she didn't want to appear like a simpering fool, so she squared her shoulders and glanced indifferently off to the side. "Oh" she simply remarked, "it's you... I wasn't aware that we both owned the same shade of lipstick." Quirking her lip up into a coy smile, she placed her hand against the firm solidness of his chest and gave a light push. "If you'd please step aside, I'd very much like to return to my date with Harvey."

She thought she felt him give some resistance, her blue eyes turning sharp as she gazed up at him in annoyance. "I _said_ move" she practically growled.

Swiping his tongue across his painted lips, the Joker returned, "Oh yeah, Sweet Berrietastic is my fav-ori-te shade." Her hand remained on his chest and as he lightly caressed her forefinger, he continued, "Harvey can wait; you and I have some unfinished business, wouldn't you say?"

She looked confused and as he brought her slim digit to his lips, then gently kissed the tip. With salacious eyes, he asked in a seductive whisper, "Is this the one that brought you the most pleasure?"

Rachel hitched in a bated breath. "I-I don't know what you mean" she choked, her thighs clenching as she tried to staunch the burning ache in her loins. Watching his shark-like eyes observe her with a lecherous glaze, her breathing quickened, but she quickly glanced off to the side like before to ease the warmth in her lower extremities.

The Joker quickly moved his head in front of her eyes so she was forced to face him. His lower lip twitched as an image of her bringing herself over the edge, screaming his name, appeared in front of him. Narrowing his eyes and slowly nodding his head, he said, "Yeah, you do."

He took out his favorite blade, clicked it open, and scratched the tip on his chin as he continued, "Let me refresh your memory… I believe you were wearing my favorite blouse that night."

He took the shiny steel, then started at her throat before working his way down the middle of her chest as he reminded her, "The one with the pretty ruffles down the front, even though you look so much better in silk…just my preference."

The two black circles of his eyes followed the knife as it traveled down her body. "That black skirt you had on, though, mmmm, it's the bomb! All nice and tight, just like you."

Rachel felt her face turn pink in embarrassment. "Y-you saw!" she exclaimed, completely horrified that this excited her more than she'd ever willingly admit. Squirming beneath his smoldering gaze, she whimpered as she felt the cool metal of the blade tracing down along her flesh, her hips twisting as she fought to control her breathing. Finally meeting directly with his eyes, she frowned before snapping, "It's rude to spy on people, you know… That was private."

A high pitched chuckle escaped from his depraved heart and he giggled, "Yeah, I know, but you were so beautiful…" and as a piece of green tinted hair fell over one eye, he licked the corner of his mouth and pressed the cold blade against her lips. "I loved the way my name sounded coming from the depths of your soul."

Rachel shuddered, her body squirming as she tried to slow the soft, excited pants of her breathing. Daring to reach out a well-manicured hand, she allowed her fingers to trace along the Joker's torso before curving up toward the back of his neck, her nails lightly grazing the flesh as she whispered, "I doubt you heard every time I said your name… You couldn't possibly spy on me while I showered, could you? Or when I was in my office? Or Harvey's bed while he took a bath?" Her eyes were glowing as she said this, but she somehow managed to remain calm despite her tremendous arousal.

A shiver went through the Joker's dark soul as she spoke. He pictured her in the shower, water cascading down her curvaceous body, head thrown back, shouting his name in sheer ecstasy.

He leaned forward and pressing his hips ever so slightly into hers, he growled, "Mmm, too bad I wasn't there to uh, help you along." And he stared at her, challenging her to a silent game that she knew she had started.

(Since it gets a bit risque after this, I decided to end it here. :-P)


	8. Slumber Party

CO-WRITTEN WITH LARISSAFAE

"Slumber Party"

Rachel tasted bile as she continued to sit staring at her captor, her hands folding and unfolding out of nervous habit as she sank in her seat. She couldn't believe her impulsiveness, but she'd encountered him in a dark alleyway and had rendered him completely unconscious. She'd never dreamed of needing to use her miniscule karate skills, but so far her lessons from her cousin had proved to be advantageous. But now the true question was what she'd do with the Joker now that she had him tied up in her living room.

Worrying her lip in between her teeth, Rachel anxiously glared back at the clown prince of crime, her heart palpitating with sheer contempt as she reflected on his cruelty and lack of compassion. Only days before he'd killed a school bus filled with children_...children,_ for God's sake, and he'd been laughing the entire time, at that. All she wanted to do now was beat him to a pulp, but her more sensible side convinced her that it was best to negotiate. That is, if he ever woke up...

Peering over the Joker's prostrate form, Rachel gave a start when he coughed and grumbled something unintelligible. His eyes weren't open, so perhaps he was still asleep?

"You smell like applesauce." It was the first thing that came to mind when the Joker swam into consciousness other than the pain, so it was the first thing he decided to say. Then he flexed his wrists and ankles, testing the restraints that held him to the chair and noting that she'd taken his jacket _and_ shoes off. Smart girl.

The Joker started giggling through his split lip as he opened his eyes. Christ, Rachel couldn't weigh more than a buck ten, and she'd kicked the crap out of him. He was almost half a foot taller, outweighed her by at least one-hundred fifty pounds, was quicker than her, and yet here _he_ was, tied down to a chair in . . . yes, in _her _apartment. The ridiculousness of it all had tears streaming down his face as he peered up at her, eager to see if she got the joke.

"_Wooo_wowowow," he cackled, "taking lessons from Batsy, are we? Ooh, you broke me..." He burst into a fit of guffaws, his sides hurting from it. "Sheesh, I think I picked the wrong arch-nemesis, little girl. Ow...oh, but it hurts so _good__!"_ he exclaimed, wide awake now and determined to be as much of an ass as possible. She'd earned it, after all.

He was still chuckling, fiddling with the rope binding his hands, trying to see if there was enough give to get them loose.

Scowling, Rachel felt the sudden compulsion to jab the Joker in the solar plexus, but she refrained from doing so and crossed her legs as she glared back at him. "Don't mock me" she warned, her lips twisting into an irritated pout. "And for your information, _Batsy,_ as you call him, has nothing to do with this. You and I are going to have a little talk, alright?"

When the Joker grinned cheekily over at her, Rachel dug her nails into her palms until she drew blood, her eyes now an electric blue as she snapped, "Just tell me that you understand!"

"Ohhhhh, I understand _so_ much, darling," he drawled, eyes crawling over her body. He giggled at her anger and flicked his bloody tongue over his lips. "Got anymore lipstick, doll? I'm, uh, in need of a little touch-up." He smacked his lips together loudly, then coughed and spat on her carpet. "Sorry; sinuses, y'know. They get to me sometimes. Oh, Rachel, _Rachel_," he sighed, "instead of bringing me to the police, you brought me to _your_ place! Are you going to kill me? Batsy can't. He doesn't want to be a murderer, so he lets me kill over and over and over again, just to keep his own hands clean."

He crossed his eyes at her and stuck his tongue out. "But see, every time he _doesn't_ kill me, and I kill _more_ people . . . are his hands _really_ so clean, after all that? The world may never know." He giggled and gave up on his hands for now, instead bouncing in the chair toward Rachel, eyes shining with excitement. "But will _you_ kill me, Rach? Will you? Got the balls for it? _Huuuuuh_?"

Eyes alight with a molten fury, Rachel dug her nails in deeper amidst her flesh and clenched her teeth. "I've got more balls than you'll ever have" she seethed, her voice eerily quiet. "Anybody who murders children is nothing but a coward, Joker...you may find pleasure in something so despicable, but _I_ do not. I could never murder anyone, even a scum bag like you."

Now rising so that she was towering over his smug form, Rachel felt her bottom lip twitch at the unnerving calm he currently exuded. The bastard was clearly enjoying her discomfort, and it was evident in the way he leaned back and gave her a sly grin. She wanted to strike him, but again she held her ground.

"Look" she began again, "I know that you have plans for my fiancé, and I've brought you here to change your mind."

The Joker gave a disgusted sigh and rolled his eyes, sitting back. "Oh, for Pete's sake," he muttered. "Honey, _honey_, you're missing the entire_ point_!" He leaned forward, disappointment written all over his face. "Look, do the _math_, Rach. Batsy doesn't kill me, he lets me go…I kill people. He catches me, I get away and kill _more_ people! You're saying that _my_ life is more important than _everyone else's_; do ya see what I'm _getting_ at? I feel so special, I really do, thank you _so_ much, but there's something wrong with the fact that you guys don't put a bullet through my brain when you get the chance! Splooch!" he shrieked, cackling again.

When he calmed down a bit, he pouted at her. "And honestly, honey-bunches-of-oats, I don't puh_-lan_ things. Seriously. _Look_ at me." He jerked his head down and then raised his eyes back up at her. "And hmm, why _do_ you smell like applesauce?"

Rachel folded her arms in disgust. "Well why do _you_ smell like soy sauce and turpentine!? None of my personal business is _any_ of yours, so just…just…" Frustrated, the assistant DA finally gave in to her desires and struck him clear across the face. The force of the impact surprised herself (and most likely the Joker, as well), but the stinging sensation tingling along her palm felt deliciously merited.

"You're lying" she rasped out, her hand clenching as she fought not to strike him again. "You wouldn't have come to Harvey's fundraiser if you didn't have plans for him."

Now seizing him by the lapels of his ridiculous shirt, she hissed, "Tell me what you have planned before I'm forced to do something I regret!"

As soon as Rachel said these words, she immediately wished that she could retract them. Regret, after all, was the last thing she could feel in regards to the Joker's physical agony.

The Joker laughed, breathless and elated. "Do it!" he screamed at her, jerking forward in his restraints with a manic grin. "Do it! Do something you'll regret!" Then he hunched his head between his shoulders and gave her a sideways grin. "Did I tell ya what I _did_ to the brats first?!" He whooped with laughter as she shook him, his head snapping back. "Owwwww . . . Sheesh, just wanted to, uh, offer a _con-_tri-_bution_ to Harvey's cam-_paign_ . . . offer a little re-_lation-_ship advice, since it seems you're _ob-_viously not getting all that energy worked out of ya . . . Anyone ever done the ABC thing to ya?" He jerk backwards as she came for him, tipping over and cracking his head on the floor. "Ooooh . . . Hey, I _do_ smell like soysauce . . . _weird_!"

"Shut _up!" _Rachel screamed, her eyes brimming with tears as she reflexively kicked him in the stomach. When he tensed and began whooping with laughter, she gritted her teeth when she realized that he _enjoyed_ the pain. "You're sick" she hissed. "God, you're _sick!_ Why can't you just go back to wherever the hell it is you came from and terrorize _those_ people, instead!?"

Falling down to her knees, Rachel seized him by his tie before snapping, "And if you ever come near Harvey again, I swear to God, I _will_ kill you." Although the threat was relatively hollow, a chill trickled down her spine like ice as she realized that if she wanted to do it, she _could._

The man before her was suddenly serious. "I was born in Gotham," he told her, his voice a light tenor. Then he shrieked again with laughter. "So I'm terrorizing the hell I came from!" He laid his head on the floor and rolled his eyes up at her, licking his lips. "The next time I get my hands on Harrrrrvey," he purred, "I'm going to kill him. So go ahead, be like Batman and _let me go_, so that you can _let Harvey die_ because you couldn't finish me off."

He took a deep breath and with a heave, brought his arms up, over his head -- winced as they popped partially out of the joints -- and over Rachel's head, pulling her down and crushing his lips against hers.

"Because if you _don't_ kill me tonight," he growled against her mouth, "I'll kill you _all_, Rachel Marie Dawes."

Then he truly _did_ kiss her, a big, sloppy, wet kiss, dissolving into giggles as he rubbed his cheek against hers.

Outraged by his unanticipated maneuver, Rachel struggled amidst his heated embrace before punching him straight in the gut. She heard him give a giggle-filled _'oof!'_ when her fist connected with his middle, her eyes blinded by tears as she screamed, "I won't let you kill him, I won't, I won't, I _won't!_" Beating against his chest with her fists, she felt the tears stream down her cheeks in hot torrents, her bottom lip quivering as she sobbed, "God, what do you _want_ from this city? We have nothing you need, nothing you could possibly benefit from…if you want me to kill you so badly, why don't you just do the damn deed yourself!?"

Suddenly afraid that she had overstepped her boundaries, Rachel fell silent as she forced herself to gaze back into the Joker's mercilessly dark eyes.

He looked derisively heartbroken as he pulled her down, cradling her head against his chest as he rocked side to side as best he could. "Oh, Rachel, Rachel, shhhhh, quiet now . . ." He kept murmuring comfortingly in her ear, pressing kisses to the top of her head. "This city has _everything_ I need, Rach, _everything_. Hot little assistant D.A.'s, huge freaking bats crusading against evil, knights in shining armor . . . everything except criminals worthy of that name, and that's what _I'm_ giving to _you_, don't you see?" His heart was pounding in his chest, next to her ear. "_I_ don't want to die, sweetie, I want this whole fucking _city_ to burn! I want all you mindless little rats to realise the scientist's _maze_ you're in and break free of it!" He jerked his aching shoulder until she looked up at him, gazing into her eyes to see if she understood. "Don't you _see_, Rachel Ma-_rie_? _Hm__?"_

"You're insane" Rachel declared, her eyes widening as she found herself frozen beneath his intense gaze. It was as if he were a snake and she, the poor little mouse that he'd bitten and paralyzed. "How can you honestly believe that we need you? This isn't National Geographic, you lunatic...we don't _need_ an outer force to mess with the food chain!"

Scowling, she hotly added, "Now let me go before I'm forced to hurt you!" As she said this she poised her knee in preparation for firing it straight at his groin.

Her current position overbalanced her _perfectly_. The Joker heaved himself to the side, grunting as the chair thwacked him in the back of the skull, and ground his hips into hers as he forced his way between her legs. It wasn't easy, and she was making _such_ a fuss, but he bit down on her pretty little throat until she held still.

"The first thing in this situation, _dearie_," he growled into her ear, "is that you _never_ let someone _know_ you're about to hurt them!" He shifted and then bit her cheek with a frown. _"__Secondly__,_ I am _not_ insane, or crazy, or _anything like THAT_. Understand, beautiful?" He licked the teeth marks on her cheek slowly, firmly, then kissed them. "Now, I don't know about _you_, but I've got _all _day to stay here like this with you. And it you _try_ to knee me in the groin, I'll bite your fucking nose off."

His eyes crossed briefly and the Joker shook his head, then looked down at his captive captor. "Shoulda just called the police, toots. Oh, well. I'll find a way to amuse us . . ." He worried his lower lip, glancing around to see what was in reach. "Need out of these _ties_, right?" he asked Rachel brightly. "Or maybe you could spew some more of your bullshit at me."

Rachel whimpered as she laid deathly still beneath his solid form, her breathing coming in slow, soft pants as her heart pounded in her chest like a boxing glove. She hated the way he bit and groped at her as if she were some object to be claimed, but what's worse was the fact that her body clearly found his administrations to be terribly erotic. Grimacing, she squirmed before snapping, "If you'd get off of me, I-I could untie you..."

Feeling her injured cheek stinging from the Joker's bites, Rachel shuddered as she felt him moving against her like before. She was so tense she could've easily been snapped in two, but for her own sake of survival, she wanted to appear strong.

The Joker gave her a look of genuine puzzlement. "Get off _on_ you?" Then his expression cleared. "_Oh!_ Get off _of_ you. Damn, for a moment I thought you were one kinky bitch." He shook his head again and wiggled his hips in imitation of her. "Though gee, Rach, are you _sure_ you said get off _of_? I mean, your body's _gotta_ be reacting by now, if y'know what I mean." He grinned at her, still idly moving his hips across hers. "Does it bother you, getting turned on by this situation? Oh, what would _Harrrr_vey think? Would he . . . under-_stand_ the way female physiology _works_, I wonder?" His voice lowered to a growl. 'Cause _I_ do."

Biting her lip, Rachel promptly turned her face so that she was glancing off to the side, her breaths growing steadily labored as she felt his firm arousal grinding against her pelvis. "Stop it" she whimpered, her breasts thrusting outward as she tried to struggle free once more. The only thing she succeeded with this action was aggravating her already stimulated nub, a soft whine escaping her lips as she pleadingly looked up at the Joker with the hopes of him releasing her. Suddenly finding her voice, she rasped, "I-I'm not turned on by this at all...you've got a lot of nerve for bringing up Harvey and his ability to...to..." Unable to finish, she blushed when she squirmed about and groaned. Trying to close her parted legs, she winced when she felt the Joker deter her actions and keep them firmly spread, her heart rate rapidly accelerating as she suddenly felt that she was trapped with nowhere to run.

It would be working better if his ankles weren't still tied to that damned chair. Joker grunted again. "I wasn't _talking_ about Harvey's sexual prow-_ess, _Rachel Ma-_rie,_" he said sharply. "Geez, I'm just screwing around with you. Look, you were doing so damned _good_," he said encouragingly. "Got me tied down, you were smacking me around . . . then you _lost_ it. Come _on_, Rachel, take some _charge_ of the situation!" He sucked on her wounded cheek for a moment, tongue worrying the indentations his teeth had left, then he hooked his still-tied hands around her waist and hauled them both up, her on her rear and he on his knees. "Look, now . . . oh . . . _fuck_ . . ." The Joker swayed as the blood rushed to his cracked head, and he slowly toppled over as his world went black once again

Quivering from both fear and arousal, Rachel trembled as she quickly scrambled out from under his limp body, her hand passing over her mouth as she wondered how in God's name she'd allowed him to get the upper hand like that. As much as it infuriated her to admit it, the Joker was absolutely right; she'd been doing _so_ well, and then all of a sudden her brain had turned to mush and left her completely defenseless.

Rising on wobbly knees, Rachel apprehensively took the Joker by the collar and yanked him and his chair back to their rightful position. To her disgust, she found that her panties were still damp from his administrations, her teeth gnawing into her lower lip as she shakily sat down on her chair and tried to ignore the pounding in her head.

Rubbing at her throbbing temples, she realized that the Joker's sudden fainting spell could easily buy her some time. Not for long, of course, but enough to help her regain her bearings.

Retreating from her spot on the plush chair, Rachel hurriedly grabbed her switch blade from her desk drawer and returned to the Joker with it held purposefully in between her fingers.

The Joker dragged himself back to consciousness again, but this time his head was throbbing more than it usually did.

"Padded chairs," he mumbled thickly. His mouth was dry and he was starting to get hungry. "Geez, what's a guy gotta do to get some food around here?" He looked up at Rachel through his eyelashes and snorted at the knife she held. "Whatcha gonna do?" he slurred. "Cut me? Doesn't sound like a bad time, you know.." _God_, how hard had his head been _hit_ the last few hours?

Frowning, Rachel snapped, "You nearly rape me, and you actually expect me to _feed_ you? I'm afraid you're going to be sitting there for quite some time, because until we resolve our differences, I'm afraid you won't be walking free _or_ eating." Holding the blade out for good measure, she added, "I won't call the police, but _only_ because I want to do things my way."

The Joker snapped his chin in toward his throat, giving her a strange look. "Nearly _rape_ you? _Nearly_ rape you? Rachel Ma-_rie_, if I'd _nearly_ raped you, your _pants_ would be off at the very least. Besides," he said with a shudder, "it's not fun if they're not willing. And, uh, don't the Geneva conventions say something about not abusing prisoners? Or are we just saying "Fuck you, civilized society, I'm gonna follow my _own_ rules!"? 'Cause, uh, that's the way _you_ like to play things." He eyed the knife in her hand, the set of her jaw, and raised his eyebrows. "Or maybe not," he murmured to himself.

Then the Joker settled back in the chair, raising his bound hands to rub at his shoulders and adjust his tie more neatly. "So, Rachel Ma-_rie_, how's this gonna go? I have to ask that you don't touch the clothes -- they were a bitch to sew up and I've run out of the fabric I used." He clicked his tongue against his teeth as he watched her intently.

Rachel couldn't help but smirk. "You mean to say that a man who cares little for his appearance cares about his _clothes?_ That's rather materialistic, don't you think?" Tightening her grasp about the blade, she placed a hand on his shoulder before tracing the metal tip along his chin, suddenly able to understand why he'd reveled in her fear at the fundraiser. The feeling she received from holding the instrument of death thrilled her, the blade now tracing in a threatening fashion toward the collar of his prized clothing.

"Now that we're finally getting somewhere, I'd suggest that you stop calling me Rachel Marie" the assistant DA firmly urged. "We do _not_ know each other, nor will we _ever_ get the chance, so the very least you could do is treat me with respect. Fair?"

"Hey, babe, pride in what you create. I create anarchy, and I'm proud of it. I create my own clothes, and I'm proud of them." The Joker was content to let her play her games, tilting his chin into her blade with a knowing smile for her. "_But_, if you in-_sist_, what do you want me to call you?" He swallowed convulsively and his pulse pounded in his throat. He wasn't even thinking about how easy it would be to knock the knife from her hands, seeing as she hadn't retied his hands behind him. This was just so . . . _fascinating_.

"Where do you want me to start?" he whispered. "Wanna know about my old man? Great guy. Loved him to death. My uncle, however . . . not such a nice guy. Had a problem with his dick, y'know. Real small. Could only get it up around dicks smaller, and hey, mine was the only one smaller at the time." He was watching her, eyes clouded over with simmering anger and the beginnings of another fit of hysteria.

Rachel balked, her tongue swabbing her lips due to the sudden dryness that had overcome her mouth. "W-what the hell does _that_ have to do with anything?" she demanded, truly horrified by the potential ending of his story. Trying to appear unfazed, she used her free hand to hold his head still as she traced the knife back up toward his chin. His gaze chilled her, but she refused to meet with the eyes that seemed like abysmal pools of never-ending darkness.

"Just wanted to get to _know_ you, _Miz_ Dawes," Joker whispered. "Get a little . . . _back_ground going on. Doesn't everyone want to know why I am how I am? How would _you_ react to being raped and beaten every summer when your parents went on vacation and you were left in your uncle's _ten-_der _care_? _Starved_? Come _on_, Miz Dawes, why the long face?" He drew back, his brow puckering. "Is it the scars? It is, isn't it? It's _always_ the scars. Mom never quite hugged me the same after she and Pops got back and I had them. Always wondered why I'd suddenly snapped and murdered my dear, suh-_weet_ uncle. Never did bother learning the _truth_ of it all."

He relaxed, suddenly seeming exhausted, and closed his eyes. "Your turn, _Miz_ Dawes. Tell me _all_ about yourself."

Shaking, Rachel suddenly retracted the knife and stared back at him in mute horror, her heart clenching painfully at the thought of any child having to undergo such trauma…such _agony._ "I-I didn't know" she stammered, "I mean… …I'm sorry. Really."

Dumbly holding the knife at her side, she felt as if she owed him somewhat of a story as well, so she slowly sank into the chair across from him and spoke. "I'm very boring…nothing exciting, which is probably why I chose to be a lawyer in the first place, now that I think about it. I'd always look forward to camping trips in the summer, but that's about it." Smiling wistfully, she added, "That was the only time I could escape from Gotham…the only time I could truly be _myself."_

Suddenly realizing that she was pouring her heart and soul out to a _madman,_ Rachel shook her head and grumbled, "But that doesn't matter…the past is in the past. All that should _truly_ be on our minds is the here and now."

"Sssssuuuuure," said madman dragged out, chewing on the inside of one cheek. "Let's rap. Look, _Miz_ Dawes, I just . . . _do_ things, see? I don't _plan_ anything out -- too many chances for failure that way. So asking what my _plans_ for Harvey and the city are is like asking . . . well, something _stupid_, right? 'Cause I don't _have_ a plan. I don't con-_cern_ myself with, with _conse_quences or so_cie_tal norms." He was licking his lips as he spoke. "I don have the _burden_ of a conscience, Miz Dawes, so I do whatever I damn well _feel_ like doing. You under_stand_?"

Rachel screwed her lips into a frown, but her body acted before her brain when she suddenly moved forward and began to unfasten his bindings. "Fine" she irritably agreed, "if you don't have a plan, then just get the hell out...I'm sure you know by now that I could never kill you, so I'm sure I've failed whatever psychological test you've got brewing inside that twisted mind of yours."

"It's about fucking _time_," the Joker snapped irritably. He sprang up and pushed her onto the floor, then laughed as he skipped into the kitchen and flung the fridge open. "I'm _so_ hungry," he said as he unscrewed the milk cap and guzzled it right out of the jug. After that, he set it roughly on the counter and ignored the bit that sloshed onto his sleeve, flinging cupboards open until he found some bread. He turned back to the fridge and pulled out a head of lettuce, some cheese, mayonnaise, a tomato, and some turkey slices. He hummed to himself as he tipped drawers onto the floor until he found a butter knife, then merrily started making himself a sandwich. "Uh, you want a sammich or what?" he called out to Rachel.

If she wasn't going to kill him, and wasn't going to call the police, he might just stick around; she was getting more and more interesting.

Furious, Rachel staggered back up to her feet before hollering, "Just what the hell do you think you're doing!? I said get out, not make yourself at home! Or perhaps I stuttered?" Impatiently tapping her foot against the floor, she narrowed her eyes as she irefully watched him make a mess out of her kitchen. When he drew near a particularly valuable heirloom, she hissed, "Watch it! My grandma gave me that, you goon!"

The Joker looked over his shoulder at her and blinked, then picked up the heirloom and put it on the highest shelf he could find, well out of Rachel's reach.

"For safekeeping," he told her with a wink, then slapped his sandwich together and brushed past her into the living room. He plopped himself onto her couch and grabbed the remote control, flipping the TV on and settling in to watch the news.

Feeling her nerves wearing thin, Rachel tugged irritably on his arm before snapping, "Did I say you could sit there? That's _my_ couch! And hey, give me that! That's _my_ remote!"

Leaning over the top of the couch, she reached for the device as the Joker smugly moved it out of her grasp just when she'd nearly caught it. "Dammit, _stop_ that!" she shrieked, the momentum of her movements causing her to topple over and fall headfirst against the cushions. When she heard his laughter, she shrieked, "Get out, get out, get _out!"_

Being outsmarted by a clown was one thing, but having him play house with her belongings was another.

"_Geez, _Miz Dawes, calm _down_. Did it ever occur to you that I don't have anywhere to _go_?" He turned to her and threw his arm across the back of the couch. "Hey, I've got a great idea. You, uh, you let me stay _here_ tonight, I don't kill anybody, and then I'll leave in the morning! Give ol' Batsy a little break, huh?" He took a huge bite of his sandwich and gestured at her with it as he talked around his food. "Te' 'oo whu'," he said and as he swallowed it, "I'll even take a _shower_. Get nice and _clean_, whaddya say?" He took another bite, making a pleased sound. "And really, why _do_ you smell like applesauce? Please note I'm not, uh, smelling you right now."

Feeling her blood pressure spike through the roof (her doctor had warned her about her stress levels; guess she hadn't counted on running into a psychopathic clown on the way home), Rachel's lips bitterly screwed into a deep-set scowl. "How is it _my_ problem that you have nowhere to go? Maybe if you were a tad more congenial, you'd be getting invites to all _sorts_ of slumber parties, but seeing as to how you're a raving lunatic, I don't see that happening any time soon. Now if you'll kindly get your ass off my favorite side of the couch, take your overcoat, and walk right out that door, I'd be very much appreciative."

When the Joker failed to respond, she growled, "Look, you are _not_ taking a shower with _my_ soap and _my_ towels! I'm the only one allowed in there, understand!?"

And because the Joker had been told he wasn't allowed, the bathroom was naturally where he headed first as he finished the sandwich.

"Hey, you can scrub me down if you're _that_ worried about your, uh, your _puh_-recious towels," he offered. He started unbuttoning his waistcoat, watching her in the mirror. "Oooh, Herbal _Essence_! An or-_gan-_ic experience! Just think about it, doll. If _I'm_ in _here_, I'm not out _there_, and people aren't _dying_. See? Easy-peasy!" He dropped the waistcoat to the floor and yanked off his tie, then started on his shirt. "And oooh, can we tell _ghost_ stories tonight? I know some great ones!"

He sounded so _excite__d_ about sleeping over and telling ghost stories, his face all lit up in an eager grin.

Seeing the Joker removing his clothing, Rachel felt a sense of panic flare within her as she rushed forward and halted his hands. "Stop that!" she squeaked, her eyes wide as saucers. "Rule number one while in my apartment...NO naked men! You're not Harvey, so...so...dammit, just put your clothes back on!"

Quickly scooping up the scattered raiment, Rachel pushed them into his arms before giving him a firm look. "And just for that, no ghost stories...not that you were allowed to stay here, anyway."

Brown eyes stared at her in utter incomprehension. "Uh, Rachel, look, do you even_ realize _what I'm offering to you?!" he bellowed as he grabbed her upper arms and forced her back against the sink. "I am _quite_ capable of _raping_ you, _killing_ you, and sending you inpieces to Harvey over the next ten weeks!" He hooked his fingers into the waistband of her pants and yanked them down. "Do you think I give a _fuck_ about the people out _there_?! Would you _listen_ to yourself?" He slammed his shoulder into her stomach and then pulled her close, one hand around her throat as his scars rubbed against her cheek. "You'd _really_ rather I be out there _killing_ people than sleeping _here_? I'm a man of my word, Rachel, and when I _say_ I won't kill anyone tonight if you let me stay here, I _mean_ it."

He pushed away from her with a snarl, then continued to slowly unbutton his shirt. The skin that flashed into view was covered with bruises and scars, some new, but mostly old.

"So really, one more time… Are you and I going to have a nice little suh-_lum_-ber party, or am I going to find a pregnant woman and rip her fetus out of her? Isn't your neighbor across the _hall_ pregnant?" he asked acidly.

Quivering, Rachel nodded dumbly, her pride becoming wounded when she realized how small her voice sounded in her throat as she tried to speak. "Yes" she finally managed to choke out, "Y-you can stay here...for a while."

Numbly glancing down at her pants pooling about her ankles, she thought of reaching down to pull them back up over her thighs, but she realized that she was far too frightened to turn her back on her 'guest'.

Suddenly remembering how he'd kissed her earlier during their encounter, she became fearful as she dared to ask, "W-why do you want to stay here, anyway? Isn't there some nice little hotel you could go to? Er...or something?"

The Joker looked at her scornfully as he peeled his shirt off, biceps and pecs flexing as he did so. "Why would I want to pay _money_ for something I can get for . . ." and now he flicked his gaze up and down her body, ". . . _free_? Besides," he continued as he unbuckled his belt and unzipped his pants, "who else am I going to tell ghost stories with?" His pants came down in one swoop and to Rachel's complete surprise (not to mention relief), he was wearing boxers that matched his shirt.

The Joker toed out of his shoes and pulled his socks off, then placed his fists on his hips and stared down at her.

"Now, if you're not going to take a shower _with_ me, and you don't want to see my _penis_, get the fuck _out_." She was going to have to push past him to get to the door, or take the easier route that led along the side of the bathtub.

Practically jumping straight out of her skin at his answer, Rachel picked her pants up off the floor and slowly edged around him, her heart pounding like a water drum within her ears as she tried to block out the formidable figure at her side. The memory of how he'd affected her earlier that evening frightened her, so she most certainly felt it in her best interest to get out of that bathroom as soon as humanly possible.

Legs quivering, Rachel suddenly wished that she'd chosen to put her pants on, her teeth gnawing into her lower lip as she ignored the sensation that she was being watched from behind.

Unfortunately for Rachel, she'd chosen the route that put her in as little contact with the Joker as possible. This meant that she moved _toward_ the shower, not _away_ from it, which was a very particular distinction in the Joker's mind.

"Well, geez, Rachel," he remarked as his hand shot out and grabbed her wrist, "if you wanted to scrub me down, why put up such a _fuss_?" He pulled her up against him, stepping on her pants to keep her feet still as his free hand went to her shirt, tugging it up. "Still, I kinda _hurt_ from all those beatings you gave me, so some help getting _clean_ would be nice."

She was struggling and making a commotion, so he grabbed her hair and brought his mouth close to her ear. "_Look_," he hissed, "not _every_ man wants to stick his dick in you, all right? At least, not _all_ the time. And right now, right _now_ all _I_ want is a nice, long, hot shower, a good _scrub_, and then to tell some _ghost stories_. I'm not going to rape you, you narcissistic bitch." He pushed her into the shower and reached in, turning it on. "Now, are you going to take the rest of your clothes off, or am _I_?"

Whimpering, Rachel shied away from the Joker as he made a motion of reaching for her top, her fingers trembling as she turned her back to him and pulled it over her head in one full sweep. Ignoring the dizziness she felt due to the heat of the shower and the sensation of his burning eyes, she glanced hesitantly over her shoulder before easing her bra off of her lithe form and tossing it out onto the linoleum flooring. As she did so, she sensed the Joker stepping in alongside her, her body instantly tensing as she scooted away from him. She didn't want to remove her panties, for she felt that it was the one thing that kept her rapidly fading dignity in place.

"You shower with your _panties_ on?" the clown asked snidely. "What, saving money on _laundry_ or something?" He pulled his boxers off and tossed them out of the shower, then stepped under the hot stream and hissed as it melted the greasepaint on his face, sending it in rivulets down his throat and chest, slowly revealing the tanned skin that laid beneath. He grabbed Rachel's loofah and poured some body wash onto it, scrubbing at his face before glancing over his shoulder at his hostess. "Well? Get to cleaning."

The man tossed her the loofah, then turned back around and rested his forearms against the wall, letting the hot water beat down on his neck and upper back as he bowed his head. He sighed under the soothing pressure, his muscles slowly relaxing in the heat as the water traced patterns amongst all his scars.

Trembling, Rachel squeaked, "Y-you mean you want _me_ to clean you? I thought...um...weren't you joking?"

When he didn't answer right away, she suddenly fell at a loss for words when she realized that there was little to no war paint on the Joker's face. Her mouth falling into a surprised little 'o', Rachel then realized that she was one of the few people to ever see him in such a vulnerable state, and the thought somehow made her feel a sense of power. He was no longer superior to her, but on her own level.

The Joker craned his head too look at her over his shoulder, his eyes weary.

"Look, Rach," he said, "do you know what happens if I rape you? I mean, it's one of the few things I've never done, but I'm sure I could get it up for the duration. But _if_ I rape you, I don't know that you're on birth control, or if you've been taking it properly, and I _know_ I don't have condoms on me, so in order to prevent you from getting knocked up, I'd be forced to kill you. And _if_ I'd been joking about you cleaning me, I'd have _stopped talking _about it after it _stopped being funny._" He turned back to face the wall, muttering his next words. "Now start cleaning -- and I mean _everywhere_, and be gentle with the man-bits -- before I rethink my lifelong no-rape stance."

Pressing her lips into a grim line, Rachel apprehensively stepped forward and ran the loofah across his back, her lips twisting downward as she feared that he might break. He just seemed so delicate at that moment, and each cut, burn, and scar reminded her of what this man was truly capable of. Running a hand along a large laceration out of curiosity, she jumped when she thought she felt him move in disapproval.

Biting her lip, Rachel uneasily placed the loofah back along his spine before tracing up a particularly curious scar, her legs trembling as she realized that the scars on his body were far more frightening to her than the ones on his face.

"Do they hurt?" she asked, instantly regretting it the moment the words left her mouth.

The Joker was silent for a long time, breathing shallowly through his mouth as his greasy hair framed and hid his face. He'd made a lot of women bathe him before, but none of them had ever been _concerned_ about his scars. Terrified, yes, but never _worried_. Ah, hell, he'd indulge her.

"Just the new ones." He shifted and let out a sigh when she rubbed over a tense muscle, ignoring his body's reaction to her presence. He was a man of his word. "Every scar hurts when it's new." He cracked his neck and sighed again, eyes closing under her touch. "Harvey's a lucky guy, if you bathe _him_ like this," he remarked.

Rachel blushed. "I-I've never done something like this before" she admitted, cursing herself for having confessed something so personal. She was beginning to feel guilty while she touched the Joker, for each caress was far more intimate than anything she'd ever done for Harvey. They'd made love, sure, but she'd never actually taken the time to study every curve and contour of his being.

"Turn around" Rachel urged, her eyes carefully remaining on the back of his head so that she wouldn't be forced to see anything she didn't wish to.

The man tilted his face up to the stream of water and chewed the inside of his cheek for a moment, then straightened and slowly turned toward Rachel.

"Gonna remember my hair?" he murmured. He licked his lips absently as he stared at her, dark circles under his eyes, pulling his lower lip between his teeth to worry the scar there, then licking his lips some more. Then he leaned down to her ear, arousal brushing against her leg and causing her to jump. "I said wash _everywhere_," he reminded her silkily as he ran his fingers through her wet hair. "But I _am_ a man of my word." With that reassurance, he straightened and made a small show of clasping his hands behind his back. He continued his heavy stare, a slight smirk on his lips as he waited for her to touch him again.

Blushing, Rachel mumbled an unintelligible string of words as she ran the loofah across his scarred chest, her lip quivering when she realized it was far more scarred than his back. Allowing her hand to trace along what appeared to be a former bullet wound, Rachel shivered before moving her hand away from the scar as if she'd been burned. She'd never been so close to a human map of destruction before, so she couldn't help but be fascinated by the endless patches of puckered flesh. Now grazing her hand against his cheek, she reached up and gently ran her fingers through his hair, her gaze softening when she noted how human he looked at that moment. He was no longer a monster, but a man. A normal, regular man. It was a thought that could've made Rachel smile, but instead she pushed it to the far corner of her mind and massaged her hands against his scalp.

"Do you want shampoo? I only have girly scents" she mumbled, still fairly embarrassed.

"Of course I want shampoo," he told her, his voice still low as he leaned into the massage. She'd left his arms and the area below his waist alone, but he was willing to let her finish with his hair first. He knelt down slowly, knees popping as he did so, never taking his eyes from her face as his lips hovered just above her pantyline. "Saving the best for last, Ms. Dawes?" he whispered, barely audible above the shower. His eyes were clouded with desire and his breathing was irregular, throat working as he swallowed. "Come on," he whispered. "Make me smell _pret_-ty. Make me smell like _you."_

"You mean like applesauce?" Rachel quipped, her tone admirably calm as she squirted a quarter-sized amount of shampoo into her palm. Now running her hands through his greasy strands, she smiled before confessing, "I never honestly thought you washed your hair...must be a new thing for you."

Choosing to ignore the way he was looking at her, Rachel helped him rinse the suds from his hair as she suddenly realized what he'd said earlier. Blushing, she asked hopefully, "Um...done?"

The naked man in front of her raised his hands to her hips and rubbed them, appreciating their curves.

"Rachel, darling," he rumbled, "you're a smart girl. I _know_ you heard _all_ of my instructions. If I have to tell you again, I'm going to start carving into your de-_li-_cious skin." He flicked his tongue out along the top of her panties, left to right and back again, still rubbing her hips. "Now do what I told you." His voice was almost a growl at this point, it was so low.

The Joker stood up smoothly, resting his wrists on Rachel's shoulders as he stared at her. The maniac grin was gone, and he was deadly serious.

Trying to slow the soft, excited pants of her breathing, Rachel cursed when an all too familiar ache began to flair within her loins, her slim form trembling as she felt the heat radiating from his body onto hers. Closing her eyes, Rachel nodded feebly in agreement, her hands quaking as she slid the loofah across his torso and down toward his hip.

Fear and intrigue held her captive at that moment, her heart practically beating out of her chest as she drew nearer so that she could better accommodate her actions. Not wishing to tell him to turn around again, Rachel instead gave him a loose embrace so that she could reach around his back, her cheek momentarily resting against his as she drew the loofah across his backside. Feeling her cheeks burn in accordance with her actions, she felt even more humiliated when she realized that her hardened nipples were pressed flush against his chest.

Biting her lip, Rachel briefly thought of apologizing, but instead she promptly pushed away from him in embarrassment.

The Joker didn't protest; he merely grabbed the loofah from her and rubbed at his arms, then legs, scrubbing them until his skin was red. That done and still breathing heavily, the Joker grabbed Rachel and pulled her close to him, running the loofah over her own body with far less force. Arms, legs, back, front -- nothing missed his attentions, and he took care to keep their bodies touching as much as possible.

When he was done, he crushed her against him, his chest heaving as he looked down at her.

"I'm a man of my word," he growled, though at the moment it wasn't clear who he was reminding. He dropped the loofah to run his fingers through her hair, pulling her head back before pouring shampoo into the wet mass he held. He rubbed her hair down firmly, thankful she used a combination shampoo/conditioner, then turned her into the shower spray and rinsed her off before shoving her out of the shower.

"Make me some cocoa and get into bed," he ordered her. "I'll be there in a minute." He already had a firm grip on himself, and Rachel's presence wasn't about to stop him from granting his release.

Giving a subconscious whimper at the loss of bodily contact, the assistant DA righted herself on wobbly legs before hurrying out of the bathroom and into the kitchen. Placing her face in her hands, she wondered what the hell was wrong with her. She'd actually felt compelled to let him touch her...to touch _him,_ and to show him that there was more to life than blood and chaos.

Knocking over a glass amidst her thoughts, Rachel cursed before reaching for a mug and the cocoa, her hands trembling as she pulled a hoodie off the coat rack and slipped it over her half-naked form.

The washer started, and then the Joker appeared in the doorway with a towel wrapped around his waist. He was grinning again, his voice excited.

"Had to wash my clothes; hope you don't mind." On his freshly-scrubbed face, his trademark grin was more boyish than anything else. "Nice hoodie." He chuckled to himself and leaned against the counter, crossing his arms over his chest. "Told you I'd just be a minute . . . you make it so easy, y'know." He was smirking at her. "You _do_ know some ghost stories, don't you? Got a flashlight?" He glanced over the mess he'd made of her kitchen, twirling a bit of hair around his forefinger. "Is it almost done? I'm kinda cold." He held his arm out to show her the goosebumps on it, then continued in a conversational voice, "Y'know, I, uh, I'm a _man_ of my _word_ and all, but if there's uh, any little _urges_ you need taken care of, I'll be here all night. Just a thought." He shrugged as if he could care less what her answer would be.

Although the Joker's excitement had been infectious, Rachel now felt her cheeks burning as she mumbled something incoherent and handed him his cocoa. "I assume you'll want your own bed? Because I'm afraid I've only got one..." Smirking, she added, "And as a matter of fact, I _do_ know a ghost story...there's a really scary one about a clown bathing an assistant DA."

"Oooh, you'll have to give me _all_ the details on _that_ one," he cooed at her, wrapping his fingers around her wrist and pulling her after him into the bedroom. "And what's the point of ghost stories if you're sleeping in separate beds? Get a grip, Rach." He pulled the covers down, threw the towel off, and climbed in after setting his cocoa on the nightstand. "Get in." It was said lightly, but there was a knife playing along the knuckles of one hand as he said it, a silent reminder of his earlier threat. "Oh, uh, is this _Harvey's_ side of the bed?" He giggled to himself, amused at the thought of lying across Harvey's territory.

Rachel balked, her eyes glancing from the Joker down to her soaked panties before returning back to him, again. "Umm...can you turn around?" she asked hopefully. "I, uh...kind of don't want to sleep in wet underwear." Scowling, she added, "And no, that's _not_ Harvey's side of the bed...he chooses to go home after we, um...uh…" Choosing not to complete her thought, Rachel folded her arms as if this would prevent the Joker from staring at her with his prying eyes.

The Joker looked disbelieving as he turned away. "_Really_? What an asshole. He's never stayed the night? Fucked and ran?" He clucked his tongue. "Tut, tut, Rach, you should have more _con_fidence than to let that happen. Tie him _down_ if you need to. Where's your self-res_pect_?" He continued making disappointed noises, shaking his head admonishingly, until he felt the bed move as she slid in hesitantly alongside him.

Immediately flipping over, the madman grabbed the covers and pulled them over their heads, giggling in the darkness. "All right," he whispered, sliding closer to Rachel so that their shoulders touched, "tell me about this _clown_ and _assistant_ D.A. Then I've got a great one about a giant _bat_."

Shrieking as he ensconced them amidst a sea of blankets, Rachel quickly covered her lower half with her hands as she snapped, "Harvey doesn't 'fuck and run', he's just so busy that he needs to go home! And as for this story, I don't think you'd be able to handle it..." Smirking, she added, "Sissy that you are, after all."

It disturbed her to realize she was growing quite comfortable with his presence, but she decided to play along with his game lest he get knife happy.

The Joker laughed until he started coughing, then bit her neck gently, sucking on her skin. "Do I need to, ah, _prove_ my manliness to you?" he questioned. "'Cause uh, I'm _quite_ willing to." He giggled as she started spluttering, rubbing his cheek against her shoulder. "Hard to believe he'd rather go home than stay with you . . . unless you snore." Suddenly he was serious again, loud voice booming in the confines of the blankets. "You don't _snore_, do you?"

The suddenness of his exclamation startled Rachel, but because of the adrenaline rush she couldn't help but giggle and stifle her laughter with her hand. "Stop" she urged, "I...I believe you're, um...manly." Shifting about, she whimpered when she felt her bare thigh touch his, her hands falling into her lap as she suddenly felt compelled to embrace him. He was just like a giddy little child at that moment; she'd never seen him so elated and full of life, and it fascinated her to see such a unique side of him.

Annoyed by her sense of intrigue, Rachel rather begrudgingly asked, "So what's this great story about Batman? Or at least, that's who I _assume_ it's about since there aren't that many other giant bats in Gotham."

He ignored her whimper and snuggled closer, rubbing his cheek against her shoulder again before whispering in her ear. "All right, so there's this town, right? Real ratty hell-hole of a town. Lots of nasty creatures in it, ugly things all full of themselves and ignorant of their mindless existence. Then, see, this one day, this fellow comes along." His voice was dropping as he warmed to the fantasy in his head, and he slid one arm around Rachel's shoulders. "The fellow gets it in his head that he's, uh, like Dr. Frankenstein or something. So he starts gathering all the bodies of animals, yeah? And he sews them all together, and one dark and stormy night, he raaaaaises his creature up to the heavens, and lightning strikes it-BAM!" He cackled as she shrieked and clamped his hand over her mouth.

"Shut _up_, I don't need the cops over here!" But he was chortling as he continued his story. "So the doctor walks sloooooowly to his creature, and then it sits up and turns to him.

"'Speak! Speak!' he commands it!

"The creature unfolds its gigantic wings and flaps them once, twice.

"'Speak!' commands the doctor! And do you know what it said? Do you? Huh? Huh?"

He nudged and prodded until she'd whispered "No, what?"

"It said . . . 'Helloooo, Wiiiiiilllllllburrrrrr!'"

The Joker doubled over with laughter, tears streaming down his face as he gasped for breath.

Raising an eyebrow, Rachel tried her best not to laugh as she insisted, "Um...that wasn't funny. Oh well, at least you didn't bash Batman like I thought you would." Smirking when he didn't stop giggling, she gave him a shove before exclaiming, "Would you stop!? If you were worried about the cops coming over before, they definitely are now!"

"Don't your neighbors bang on the wall first?" he gasped out, rolling over and resting his head in her lap. "I'd kill you before they'd come here, anyway. And don't be so critical of my stories, unless you want to know about those kids on the bus." He smirked up at her, still insane even without most of his makeup. "_That__'d_ keep you up for _days_."

Souring, Rachel gave him a rough push -- partly for the children, and partly because she was nude from the waist down. "Don't talk to me about things like that" she warned, her voice taking on a dangerous edge. "I-I don't like it... I like it when you..." Trailing off, she decided to leave things well enough alone and looked off to the side.

"When I _what_?" he asked. "Order you around? Lick you?" He leaned in to take her earlobe between his lips, sucking gently. "When I do _that_?" he pressed. "Or when I conform to your _rules_? Do you _like_ me, Rach? The girls never _liked_ me, for some reason. Hmm, what's up with _that_?" He blew his breath out on her ear, then bit down from her lobe to her shoulder, making small growling sounds.

"But really," he said in between nips and growls, "what do you _like_ about me, Rachel Ma_rie_?"

Taking in a sharp breath, Rachel felt her lashes flutter closed as she subconsciously leaned into his touch. "I don't know" she confessed, her voice sounding small. "I-I suppose I just find you interesting, that's all…I've never met someone with such a curious outlook on life before."

Whimpering when he gave her an exceptionally rough bite, Rachel squirmed beneath him and grasped at his shoulders, her cheek pressing against his until she felt the svelte bumps of his scars. With a shiver, she noticed that he recoiled so that they were no longer cheek-to-cheek, her heart clenching as she wondered if a woman had ever touched them before. Judging by his discomfort, they clearly hadn't, so she defiantly forced his cheek back to hers. If there was anything she'd learned from her psychology classes back in college, it was that a person would eventually respond to affection even if they'd been lacking it their entire life.

"Haven't you ever hugged anyone before?" Rachel mocked, her fingers lightly stroking his surprisingly soft hair as she tried to keep him still. "You just looked like you needed one, that's all…quit acting like such a baby."

"_Bitch,_" he snarled at her, arching his neck to keep her away from his face as he tried to grab her hands. He rolled onto his back, face screwed up. "I'm not a _baby_. Stop _touching_ me!"

The Joker let out a whine of frustration, and not even the feel of Rachel pressing against his leg as she tried to hold him down distracted him. "I don't need _hugs_," he snapped, but his struggles weren't getting him anywhere. His head was still fuzzy from being hit so often that day, and he was sore, and the bed was so damned _comfortable_. He finally gave up with a snarl, chest heaving as he licked his lips out of habit.

"Bitch," he muttered again.

Rachel smothered a giggle behind her hand, for seeing the elusive clown prince of crime so bent out of shape over a simple _hug_ was quite amusing. "What's wrong with hugs?" she shot back. "When I was younger, men loved them because it was the easiest way to cop a feel without getting noticed. Maybe the rumors are true...maybe you _do_ have the hots for the notorious Batman." Letting out a trill of laughter at this, Rachel decided that she'd officially lost her mind as she flopped back against the pillows and continued to fight her laughter. "Sorry" she apologized amidst snickers, "I just...God, I'd forgotten why I don't invite insane convicts over to my apartment. Guess I tend to adapt to the levels of sanity in my surroundings."

The Joker leaned up on his arm at the mention of Batman, a wicked grin on his face. "Oh, _yeeah_," he purred, "Batsy gives me such a _hard-on_!" He threw one leg in between hers, rubbing said arousal against her thigh as he laughed, one hand once more over her mouth to stop her from screaming. "I'm _insane_," he snarled in her ear, "but I'm not a _convict_ -- they'll have to catch me first!" He chortled, keeping his legs wrapped tightly around hers, but his thrusting had stopped. "Though if you want to _hug_ me, you can always hug my _face_ with your _thighs_." He rested his face close to hers, breath hot on her skin and heavy tongue tracing patterns on his lips.

Rachel bit her lip to suppress a small moan when she felt his warm body press flush against her curves, her cheeks growing red as she glanced off to the side in utter contempt. "I-I'm not like that" she whispered, her chest rising and falling as she felt a burst of heat coil within her lower belly. The thought of having a crook pleasuring her, and the _Joker_ no less, made her feel deliciously dirty, her nails almost threateningly raking down his back as she remembered his earlier words about understanding female physiology. The very thought made her want to snort in derision, for the notion of this man – this _monster_ – actually understanding something as delicate as pleasuring a woman seemed absurd. "What makes you think I want that?" she finally rasped out. "All you crooks seem to believe that the good girls want the bad boys, but I can assure you that it's not completely true."

Rachel's protests amused the Joker, especially in light of her hitched breath and pounding heart, and the way her voice caught when she spoke. The Joker wasn't one for actual intercourse -- he'd shied away from _that_ after he'd knocked up that one girlfriend of one of his goons and burned down her apartment to erase any genetic link to him.

But still, he'd found that having a woman -- or man, for that matter (sex was sex; so long as it fulfilled his own ego, the Joker wasn't picky about the plumbing) -- and being able to control their desire, their release . . . it was a power rush that he was all too happy to give in to.

He hissed as her nails raked down his back, arching into the contact and nibbling lightly on her throat. His hand rested on her hip and tugged gently at the hair there as he laughed into her pulse.

"Come on," he snorted, "don't tell me that if I, uh, _tested_ the waters you'd be completely dry? _Rrrrachel_," he purred as he pulled her head to the side, brushing his lips against her cheek, "don't _lie_ to me."

"Don't touch me" Rachel hissed back, yet her voice lacked the conviction she'd been striving to convey. Cursing when his hips began to grind against her own, she dug her nails into his flesh and felt a sense of disgust when her body began to respond.

_'It's only natural'_ she inwardly assured herself. _'You're only human, and you can't control your body...it's not because you want this.'_

Tempted to kick him in the shin, Rachel then decided (primarily because of the Joker's giggling) that he was merely toying with her. Scowling, she determined that_ she_ wouldn't be the one to cave under his administrations, but the other way around. Rachel wasn't accustomed to attempting such a daring stunt, but she knew that she wasn't about to accept defeat when the Joker was in _her_ home and in _her_ bed.

Raising herself up so that she was propped on her elbows, Rachel gave the Joker a surprisingly coy smile as she purred, "Have you ever been kissed by a woman, Joker? You're always going on and on about how much they hate you and your scars, after all..." Reaching out and gliding her thumb along his scarred lip, Rachel pressed her forehead to his before replacing her digit with her warm tongue, a breathy sigh escaping her lips when she closed the distance between them and pressed her mouth firmly to his. The sensation was odd at first, but not at all unpleasant. Although Rachel had put on similar acts in the past, she somehow didn't need to put as much effort into this game, and the sudden realization of this highly disturbed her.

The Joker's eyebrows arched as she kissed him. He hadn't expected her to give in, and therefore suspected she _hadn't_, but he was content to lay there and let her kiss him. He slid his tongue against hers -- and that was scarred, too -- as he raised one hand to the base of her neck, fingers curling into her hair as his other massaged a breast through her hoodie.

She tasted good. He wondered how _else_ she tasted, and if he should assume that this was a request to go back on his word. He toyed with the idea as he rubbed her neck, then decided he'd let it play out a bit more. She'd be his soon enough, even if he had to drop by on a weekly basis. Anyone with enough brawn or drugs could rape someone, but it took _true_ skill, the Joker felt, to bed someone who'd denied with all their soul that they didn't want you.

He bit down on her lower lip gently, then sucked on it before pulling her head back to kiss down her throat. He was slow, taking his time and paying very careful attention to the way she reacted, her breath and the tenseness of her muscles. Yeah, people didn't like his scars, but give them enough money or spend enough time on them, and they all eventually gave in.

Wriggling about within his grasp, Rachel was careful to keep her legs firmly closed to prevent the Joker from arousing her even more than before, or from discovering that she _was,_ indeed truly aroused. She hated herself for it, but a man who used his hands for destruction was surely capable of bringing people to their knees in all possible ways. Although this thought was meant to comfort Rachel, it only made her feel far worse than before. She was allowing the Joker to touch her...a man who'd _killed_ people with the hands that were now caressing her, and yet she was doing little to nothing to fight him off. Perhaps she was wrong in her earlier statement; perhaps she actually _was_ 'that kind of girl'.

Afraid of how she must look to the Joker's predatory eyes, Rachel was careful to remain stalk-still as he continued to touch her, her limbs quivering when he brushed her skin in a manner that caused a shiver to jolt all the way down to her toes. The sudden movement caused her bare hips to brush against his own, her teeth biting into her lower lip as she swallowed and tried to fend off the soft, breathy moans that longed to escape her throat.

"Now," the Joker whispered as he kissed the back of her ear, hips rising slightly to meet her own, "we've come to a crossroads, Rachel." He pulled back and caressed her cheek, then ran his fingers through her hair. "Either you let me go down on you -- and I _promise_ you'll enjoy it -- or you turn around and we go to sleep. It's your call, my dear, but if you don't decide in the next thirty seconds, I'm going to decide for you."

He relaxed back into the pillow on his arm, watching her.

Feeling an irrepressible tingle shoot through her veins with his words, Rachel whimpered and closed her eyes, her thighs subconsciously parting as she found her body scooting closer to his. She was suddenly cold now that he'd removed himself from her lithe form, but she tried to convince herself that this was the only reason she was letting him get even remotely close to her. The tremulous heat in her lower belly was making her nauseous, her hand suddenly grasping at his wrist as she made her decision.

Taking the Joker by the shoulders, Rachel angled her mouth roughly over his and maneuvered herself so that she was straddling his waist, her hands gliding up to steady him as she slid her tongue past his lips and moaned into their heated kiss. She was admittedly surprised by her actions, but the longing ache in between her thighs was forcing her to forfeit her dignity and give in to her desires. He wasn't a monster when she closed her eyes, so as she licked and nipped at his lips, she imagined that he was a normal man providing her with what every normal man wanted.

The Joker chuckled his victory over her, ego swelling at the accomplishment as he pulled her hips against his, teasing himself with the friction he so badly wanted, but wouldn't give fully into. He let out an appreciative murmur as his hands dragged around the curve of her hips and into her small waist, then up her sides as he raised the hoodie. He broke the kiss long enough to pull it off of her, then leaned back and took his time to explore her, front and back, dark eyes watching as his hands moved across her body. He rubbed, tickled, and pinched gently, looking from his hands to her face to gauge her reactions.

The undersides of her breasts weren't that ticklish, from what he could discern, and she liked her nipples pinched, but not too roughly. Her breasts themselves could take a little more manhandling, her rump was _exceedingly_ ticklish, and once the madman was satisfied that he knew her torso well enough, he shifted her back and up a little in order to slide his fingers in between her thighs, taking as much care there as he had with her top as he rested his forehead between her breasts, her noises of pleasure music to his ears.

Rachel gasped softly as the heat in her loins only intensified, her fingers instinctively gripping at the Joker's hair as she bowed into him and bit at his earlobe. Her breathing grew shallow with desperation as she felt him probing at her sensitive flesh, a soft cry of abandonment leaving her lips when he pressed a finger past her entrance. Whimpering his name – or at least the name that she _knew_ – Rachel nuzzled him out of habit and tried to coax him into yet another bruising kiss. Feeling their tongues battle for dominance, Rachel moaned as she gripped the sides of his face and forced him down onto his back, her mouth breaking free of his before fanning several burning kisses along his cheek, neck, and the scarred planes of his torso.

Moving her hips in time to the torturous thrusts of his fingers, Rachel ran the fire of her tongue across one of his nipples before kissing the scar directly alongside it, her lips repeatedly claiming his flesh in sloppy, artless kisses as she made the slow trek back up to his scarred mouth. Gazing down at him through heavy-lidded eyes, Rachel smiled slightly before bending her head and kissing one of his facial scars. The act was short and sweet at first, but then she tentatively lowered her mouth to his skin and kissed his scar yet again, only this time the action was far more sensual. Deliberately licking and worrying the puckered flesh between her lips and teeth, Rachel allowed her lips to dance across the scar before pressing back against his mouth, her tongue reflexively licking his bottom lip as she'd often seen him do out of nervous habit. Gliding her tongue over his, she then embraced him and pressed her soft curves against his welcoming body, her heart pounding as she suddenly tucked her head beneath his chin and held him tight. Somewhere along the way, Rachel had abandoned her lust and had reunited with her typical lovemaking mannerism: affection.

The Joker let her kiss him for a while, but she wasn't _biting_, and it wasn't fun if he wasn't _hurting_ from it. He pulled her up for another kiss, biting her firmly, but not enough to draw blood, then rolled them over and knelt between her legs, one hand still exploring her nether regions while the other hand kept his balance and his mouth worked on her breasts. He was going to bring her very close to the edge, but not over.

Startled by the sudden change of position, Rachel whined as she arched her back and lifted her hips to meet with his administrations, her legs spreading further in sweet surrender as she fisted his damp locks and breathed a sigh. He was far gentler than she thought he would be, but she couldn't help but wonder if he was just giving her a false sense of security. Thankful that there weren't any knives lying about, Rachel yelped when he bit down on a hardened nipple, her eyes narrowing down at him as she gave him a slight whack over the head.

The pain had been sobering, and to her disgust, she found that she hadn't minded it as much as she should have, especially when he was grinning back at her in that infuriating manner he always held.

The Joker watched her as he bit down on her nipple again, rubbing her clit as he did so, watching the shock on her face as the pain and pleasure mingled. After a few more bites, he moved to give her other breast the same attention, always rubbing as the pain flared. He was chuckling as he continued the treatment, kissing and biting along her sides, working his way in a zigzag down her body.

He tugged a little irritably at the patch of dark curls that obstructed his view of his goal, but it didn't stop him from diving right in, taking care to pay special attention to Rachel's reactions, what made her cry out and what she didn't particularly like. She didn't taste like applesauce, which he had wondered about, but she tasted _good _and he made a pleased noise.

Arching her back, Rachel placed a hand over her mouth in order to stifle her cries of passion, an almost dull ache blooming within her loins as her body hummed with a sensation she hadn't felt in what seemed like years. Harvey tried, but it had been quite a while since Rachel had ever been so close to reaching her peak. Digging the nails of her free hand into the Joker's scalp, she bucked her hips as his gifted tongue continued to pleasure her, her body writhing and her head tossing as she tried to keep herself from freefalling.

"Please..." she panted, suddenly feeling as if all of her reasoning skills had turned to mush.

The Joker turned his face suddenly and bit into her thigh, his fingers once again replacing his tongue as he rubbed and sucked until he'd gotten a large hickey to form, then he looked up at Rachel and burst into laughter at her flushed body, the ridiculous way her face was screwed up with pleasure, her one hand to her mouth as she moaned around it. He caught her eye and the tears in them before he lowered his head again, both hands grasping her thighs and holding her down as he unrelentingly assaulted her with his lips and tongue, grazing his teeth gently across her flesh until he'd brought her over the edge.

No longer caring if she was heard, Rachel placed her hands against her cheeks and gave a strangled wail as she arched her back, her hips rotating as she felt something snap deep within. Her mouth opening in a silent scream, she shuddered and shook as her release swept her away like a schooner caught in the tides. Stroking the Joker's hair with her fingers, she panted as she closed her eyes, a goofy little smile crossing her lips as she sank back against the pillow in complete satisfaction.

Mmmm, she was scratching his head . . . The Joker took a few more languid swipes with his tongue, giggling as each one made her tense up and whimper, then flopped over on his back beside her and grinned at her. He hadn't taken care of himself yet, but he'd get around to it. In the meantime, his arousal was getting a nice breath of fresh air as he bit Rachel's shoulder again, resting his teeth against her skin and humming contentedly to himself.

"So far this ghost story's been the best" Rachel managed to rasp out, her arms slipping around his waist as she gave him a rather shy smirk. Her cheeks were flushed from both embarrassment and desire, but she somehow managed to keep him from biting her as she roughly claimed his mouth with hers. Her initial intention had been to keep him from sinking his teeth into her shoulder, but now his teeth were sinking into her lips. Whimpering at the sensation of him licking their mingled blood away, Rachel ran her hand down along the front of his chest before grazing his navel, her face burying against his neck as if she wished to hide from her sins.

"Don't think I'm being all _cuddly_," he told her. "Unless you're gonna give me a hand job, keep your hands off me." He didn't _like_ the way she touched him, like his scars weren't there, like she didn't notice them. He _especially_ didn't like that his body _liked_ her gentle touches, and not in a sexual way. Maybe he'd kill her in the morning. That would put a stop to all this female nonsense she was indulging in. Yeah, he'd kill her in the morning . . . after breakfast.

Appearing to be momentarily taken aback, Rachel hitched in a breath before shifting uncomfortably within his embrace, her tone rather shaky as she asked, "Um...i-is that what you want? Because I guess I could...I mean..." Trailing off, Rachel shifted her gaze off to the side as she kept her hands glued firmly to his shoulders.

"You do it or I do it," he muttered with a shrug, her hair tickling his neck. He licked his lips, still tasting her on them, and brushed the tips of his fingers across her shoulder. If she didn't irritate him too much more tonight, maybe he'd kill her the day after tomorrow . . .

"A-alright" Rachel mumbled, her tone notably huskier. Leaning in to kiss the corner of the Joker's mouth, she lightly scoured her nails down the marred flesh of his abs before trailing lower. Scratching her thumb nail along his inner thigh, she hesitantly drifted her hand to the side before resting her palm against his throbbing member. Sucking in a bated breath, Rachel felt her legs begin to quiver due to touching him so intimately, her hand gradually curling about his shaft before giving him a long, firm stroke. Feeling the Joker lean into her touch made Rachel shiver, her eyes closing as she panted against the soft expanse of his lips. This was all so wrong, and yet she found that she couldn't deny his requests. Perhaps it was out of fear, but her bleeding heart had already succumbed to the foolish web of stories he'd created, and she wanted to help him in any way possible.

Her face near his was distracting him. The Joker irritably forced her lips to the crook of his neck, away from his facial scars. There. He could breathe better that way, and concentrate more fully on the sensations she was giving him. He continued to rub his fingers on her shoulder, but the other hand closed around hers, making her grasp him more firmly and pull harder at his length. His breath caught and he grunted softly, turning his face to pant into her hair as he showed her what he liked.

Curious as to why the Joker still wasn't comfortable with her being near his face, Rachel pressed a gentle kiss against the crook of his neck before biting him like he had done so to her. He seemed to respond to pain far more than her gentler administrations, so she tried to better accommodate him since he'd been kind enough to do so for her. Rachel wanted to laugh at this reasoning, for it seemed like a cheaply veiled excuse to sleep with a madman.

Enjoying the rush she felt from hearing the Joker's grunts, Rachel closed her eyes and shivered when he continued to pant against her dark locks. Trying to mimic the movements he'd forced her hand into obeying, Rachel began to quicken her strokes before running a thumb along his tip, her body subconsciously gravitating toward him as her core began to ache. She loved that she could cause such a powerful man to make such pitiful noises, her teeth biting into the soft pad of his earlobe as she used her free hand to clutch at his rump. The motion caused their hips to meld slightly together, her hand trapped in between their bodies as she continued to pleasure him with her shaking hand.

The Joker clenched his teeth and grunted into Rachel's hair again. He was . . ._ almost_ . . . the madman dipped his head down and bit into her earlobe, her sudden cry of pain and the blood that trickled into his mouth sending him over the edge. He shuddered as he made a mess over their hands, his stomach, and her sheets, then relaxed fully into the pillows and idly licked the semen from his fingers. The ceiling seemed to fascinate him as he cleaned his hand off, then wiped it dry on the sheets.

After a moment, he glanced at her.

"What?"

"Uh...nothing" Rachel stammered, her blue eyes wide as she watched him with a morbid fascination. Biting her lip, she hurriedly added, "I-I don't normally do this, you know...I wouldn't have let you touch me under normal circumstances."

As she allowed her words to sink in, she prayed that they hadn't sounded as hollow as she knew they were.

The Joker laughed at her. He looked her right in the eye and laughed, pulling fully away and slapping her hands when she tried to reach for him. The Joker settled onto the other side of the bed and pulled the covers up around his waist, still snickering as he shook his head and finger at her.

"Christ, Rach, you're pretty funny, y'know that? Pret-ty fri-ckin' fun-ny." He yawned and scratched at his shoulder. "Still, it's good to know you don't, uh, _get around_. Though you _really_ need to learn how to give hand jobs." He closed his eyes. "Now go to sleep, all right? I've got a busy day tomorrow." That made him giggle, but it was interrupted by a yawn.

Furious by this insinuation, Rachel grabbed a fistful of his hair and forced him to look at the traces of his 'accident', her voice dangerously low as she hissed, "Funny, you sure as hell seemed to have _gotten_ _off_ on my lousy hand job." When he didn't respond, she snidely added, "Besides, I'm not known for my hand jobs, I'm known for my _tongue."_ Clearly pleased with herself, Rachel sent him a pointed look before snuggling up against her pillow, her voice rather smug as she remarked, "And no, you _can't_ sample it, because you already made the mistake of asking for a hand job…I don't give additional favors."

"Uhh, Rach, I only _got off_ on your hand job 'cause I had to _help_ you," the Joker pointed out before drawing his hand back and smacking her ass as hard as he could. "And I don't trust your mouth anywhere _near_ my dick, all right?" He snagged his knife off the nightstand and dug it into her stomach as she turned to fight with him. "Go to sleep, will you?" He was tired and getting grouchier. Maybe he _would_ kill her after breakfast. But his ever-present headache had receded, and he barely noticed it right now. He supposed she could live a little longer, provided she keep the pain away from his skull...

Giving a small squeak of surprise, Rachel cursed when she felt the blade nick the flesh near her navel, her heart rate rapidly accelerating as she scolded herself for teasing a lunatic. Men of his caliber weren't known for their good sense of humor, after all...

Still angry from the Joker's insults, Rachel couldn't help but snarl, "Good choice, you barbarian, 'cause I would've _gladly_ bitten you man parts right off!" Shaking from both fear and humiliation, she dug her nails sharply into his forearms until she broke the skin, her eyes almost seeming to dare him to harm her as she tried to ignore the heat coming from his own gaze.

"You know, Rachel," he hissed as his eyes rolled slightly with the pain, "if you want another go, just tell me. Otherwise, go to sleep. I'm going to start _cutting_ on you if you don't roll over, close your eyes, and leave me alone. We'll play again in the morning, but right now, I want to _sleep_."

Death, sex, or sleep. It was her call. The Joker watched her darkly, quite ready to gut her if she put up any more of a fuss.

The sadistic side of Rachel rather enjoyed his cruel snarling, but the smarter side of her was deathly afraid of him. Not as much as before, naturally, but the initial apprehension still lingered. "You're in my bed" she returned just as darkly, "so doesn't that make you a guest? I'm a courteous hostess, Joker, so I always let the guests decide." Still digging her nails into his arms, she slid her knee in between his legs and rested her face against the crook of his neck.

She knew she had to be insane for instigating a criminal in such a desperate manner, but she was genuinely lonely and just longed for a little bit of warmth, no matter how un-permanent the after effects proved to be.

She couldn't see the shocked and apprehensive look on the Joker's face as he breathed quietly. He wasn't sure just what to do with this female anymore, and it felt . . . _good_ to have her pressed against his side.

He was barely aware of flipping his knife shut as he shifted just a little. He laid there for a long time, until her breathing calmed and her body relaxed into deep slumber, and then and only then did he look down at her still form and flip the covers up over her shoulder. It wasn't out of concern for her. He couldn't get completely under their warmth unless she was under them, too. It felt...strange. The usual urge to kill rose in his chest, but the Joker resisted it for once. These new sensations were worth exploring.

He didn't remember falling asleep, but his chronic insomnia kicked in eventually and the Joker once more found himself staring at the ceiling. He flicked Rachel a glanced and wiggled out of her grasp in order to switch his now-clean suit to the dryer, and after that he gladly crawled back into bed. Her apartment was freezing and he was naked besides. He pulled her warm body against his, suddenly desperate to not be cold anymore, and found a few more hours of peace in her arms.

**A/N** - May or may not be continued...we shall see. ;)


	9. Giving In

CO-WRITTEN WITH LARISSAFAE

"Giving In"

It had now been a month since Rachel's encounter with the Joker, but it had been an incident that she very much wished to forget. She'd awoken and wrapped her arms about an empty wad of sheets, so the poor woman had desired revenge more than anything else - a swift kick to the balls would've sufficed, but unfortunately the Joker had disappeared and stayed clear of her apartment. Smart man.

Humming to herself, Rachel checked the sauce simmering over the burner and re-adjusted her naughty get-up, a large grin suffusing her lips as she thought of how Harvey would react once he arrived for dinner. He'd once revealed (while drunk) that he had a fetish for French maids, so, considering how she and Harvey hadn't been doing so well sexually, Rachel had gone out of her way to not only buy a French maid uniform, but to wear it as if it were the most normal thing in the world. It was a tad more risqué than the typical uniform, what with the fact that the skirt ended well above the rump, but Rachel figured that Harvey wouldn't mind seeing the silken panties that currently adorned her figure.

Hearing a knock at the door, Rachel allowed a sinful grin to cross her lips as she eagerly skipped over to the dinner table and got into position. Bending over so that she appeared to be fixing something and not posing, Rachel wriggled her bottom about as she cooed, "Come on in, honey, the door's open!"

Silence greeted her invitation, but the door clicked shut after a moment and there was a fainter click as the lock was thrown and light footsteps followed shortly. They ended up in the dining room doorway, and what started out as intelligible speech ended in a string of spluttering consonants.

The Joker stood rooted to the floor, his eyes bugging out of his head as he stared at Rachel and her outfit. Hot. _Damn_. The heels she wore emphasized the shapely curve of her legs, and his eyes traced up the stockings covering said legs, his hands starting to shake when he saw the garter straps holding them up, curving over her black panties as she hummed delightedly to herself.

Well, _shit_. When he'd blown Dent's tires out just to fuck with the man, he hadn't expected that _this_ was the reception ol' White Knight was supposed to receive. His tongue flicked out across his lips over and over again, his brain effectively mush.

Okay, so he _wasn't_ going to just kill her. He clenched his fists and had to lean against the doorway to keep his balance, his breath coming out fast and shallow. He'd come here to do just that, sick and tired of the way Rachel Marie Dawes had been eating at his brain, his desire to be back in her embrace almost as strong as his desire for anarchy and death, and he'd come to silence that desire once and for all. He didn't need her touch . . . but right now, all he could do was stare.

Too pleased with herself to turn around and gauge Harvey for a reaction, Rachel arched her back so that her ass became even more accentuated and she smirked, her voice dropping to a dangerously seductive note as she purred, "Aren't you going to come over to the table and have your dessert, Harvey? I made it especially for you..." Giving a small moan, she slid her arms across the table cloth and laid her head down against the surface, her body now the perfect picture of complete surrender.

An entire month filled with dreams of Rachel spread out before him, the smell and taste of her, the feeling of her nails in his skin, the loathing and desire mingling on her face . . . after an entire month of that, the Joker didn't have enough willpower to not take her. Three quick steps brought him up against her and he grabbed her hips, rubbing his aching arousal into her rear as he leaned over her, his breath hot on the back of her neck. He gritted his teeth against a groan that might have alerted her to the fact that he wasn't Loverboy, covering one of her hands and creeping the other into the top of her blouse. Her nipples were already hard and he pinched her there before running his hand down her front and under her skirt, desperate to feel the heat between her legs that he'd obsessed over for so long. The Joker bared his teeth at her exposed neck, longing to sink them in and taste her blood, but instead he forced a gentle kiss to her skin, stomach clenching as she trembled beneath him and moaned, rubbing back into his crotch with obvious pleasure.

"Oh, Harvey" she gasped out, "where'd you learn to touch like that?" Closing her eyes, Rachel's breathing turned ragged as she felt hands grasping, groping, and pinching at her flesh in a desperate search for contact, her teeth biting into her lower lip as she reached blindly behind her and searched for what would initiate their future union. Smirking when she heard her lover grunt, she cupped him through his pants yet again and strayed her fingers up toward his belt, her voice growing breathy as she purred, "Do you want me to please you, Harvey? I've been practicing..."

He pushed into her hands, wanting - _needing_ - to be inside of her, but suddenly it was all too much. The Joker growled as rage filled him and he grabbed the back of Rachel's neck, forcing her head down onto the table as he drew his hand back and spanked her exposed ass as hard as he could. She cried out, hurt and confused, but he snarled and hit her again and again, as desperate to get rid of these needful urges as he'd been to fulfill them in the first place. Finally he shoved the crying woman away from him and grabbed a chair, picking it up and slamming it against the wall until it broke. He whirled back around to see her horrified face, a broken chair leg in one hand as he shook with rage.

Y-you!" Rachel squeaked, her eyes the size of saucers as she impulsively dove for one of the knives on the table. Holding it up in front of her like a pathetic little shield, she slowly backed away while shouting, "Don't come any closer or I'll...I'll castrate you!"

His only response was to pull a pistol from his jacket, aiming it very steadily at her as he advanced with blazing eyes. The Joker grabbed her wrist and twisted until she dropped the knife with another cry, forcing the gun into her mouth as he shoved her back on the table.

"You _whore_," he snarled in her ear, then pulled the gun out of her mouth to backhand her. "Who do you think you're fucking with?" He was still trembling, still aroused and it pressed into her crotch as he shook violently, gnashing his teeth even as he continued to thrust against her. It didn't seem like he realized he was doing it, either, and he wrapped his hands around her throat and started squeezing.

"I'm going to fucking _kill_ you, moonshine," he groaned into her ear, "and then, _maybe_ then, I'll get you the fuck out of my mind. You can't _bother_ me if you're _dead_." He rested his forehead against her collarbone as he choked her and thrusted, and the moisture that gathered in the hollow at the base of her throat wasn't just sweat.

Gasping and clawing at the Joker's spindly fingers, Rachel's face turned purple due to lack of air as she promptly kneed him in the groin. The action wasn't enough to get him completely off of her, but it loosened his grip to the point that she could break free of his stranglehold.

Blinking back tears, Rachel shoved the Joker off her body before grabbing the candelabra off the center of the table, the tears now falling freely down her cheeks as she sobbed, "You fucking prick! How dare you come in my apartment and talk like you're the only one affected! I...I hated you when you left! I still do!"

Raising her arm as if she were truly going to throw the candelabra at the Joker's head, Rachel gave a defeated whimper before allowing the brass object to fall to the floor with a metallic 'clang'.

"I don't give a _fuck_ about you!" he screamed at her, his makeup all the more garish from the streaks of flesh that peeked through. He lunged at her and whipped her around, pressing her hands to his cheeks with a groan as he trembled again. "I don't want your _touch_, I don't want your _sympathy_, I _don't. Want. YOU!_" But he was gasping for breath as he forced his mouth over hers, pushing her against the wall as he moved one hand to run through her hair, holding her still as he kissed her desperately. His skin was crawling for want of contact with her own, and he whined like a trapped dog as he shrugged his overcoat off and started tearing at the buttons on his shirt, forcing one of her hands inside it and flat against his chest as his legs trembled.

Feeling as if the air had been stripped from her lungs, Rachel whimpered as the Joker's lips roughly claimed her own in a bruising, demanding kiss, her hand quivering over his toned chest as she hesitantly allowed her hand to trace along the familiar planes of his torso. Pressing her cheek to his, Rachel moaned softly when their hips melded snugly together, her knees shaking as she tried her damndest to stay on her own two feet. She never thought she'd want him like this; hell, she never thought she'd want him at all, but the desperation budding within her breast and the wetness between her legs proved otherwise.

"You're a liar" she managed to rasp out, her lips searing across his chest as she rubbed her cheek against a particularly raised scar. "You do want me…I can tell."

"I am _not_ lying!" He pressed into the contact, then pulled back and backhanded her again before he got his vest and shirt off. "I _hate_ you," he snarled softly.

He ripped at his belt buckle and then his zipper, pushing his pants and boxers down before tearing at her fucking ridiculous outfit, holding her face to his chest to muffle her cries of protest. She was wet, so deliciously wet when he pushed his fingers inside of her, and the fact that this was irrevocable proof that she wanted him had the Joker throwing her to the floor and then falling heavily on top of her, knocking the breath out of the whorish bitch as he pushed her legs apart and then thrust into her with another high-pitched whine. He slapped his hand to her cheek as he pressed his own against the opposite one, forcing them to stay in contact as he grunted in time with his thrusts, hating her for making him do this, hating her for making him need to be touched by another human being, hating himself for being so damned weak, hating her for _making_ him this weak. It was all this bitch's fault, and after he was done, the Joker was going to make her pay.

Screaming at the unexpected invasion, Rachel scoured her nails down his back and left bloody half moons across his flesh, her head tossing back as she felt her body smack repeatedly against the flooring due to his merciless thrusts. "I...I hate you, too" she managed to gasp out, her eyes rolling back in her head as she wrapped her legs about his waist so that he could penetrate her deeper than before.

Panting against the soft expanse of the Joker's lips, Rachel eagerly forced his mouth against her own in a moment of desperation, her lips sliding from his in order to dot several burning, artless kisses from one scar to the other. Scratching down his back, Rachel gave a breathy moan as she felt an all too familiar tingle building up inside her body. Breasts swaying in time with the Joker's deliciously painful thrusts, Rachel bit down on his shoulder in order to stifle her cries of passion, her moans jolting through his flesh as she rolled her hips upward in order to meet with his delectable rhythm.

The Joker's grunts turned into more whines, and he suddenly lost his rhythm, thrusting wildly into Rachel before he threw his head back with a deep cry, finally emptying his seed inside of her. It was one of the most exquisite feelings he'd ever felt, and it enraged him all the more.

He bent his head down and started sucking her breast violently, rolling his tongue around her nipple as he, for once, fought against the need to kill her. He was still working at her nipple when he focused on it suddenly, then started laughing shrilly. Rachel was still clawing at his back when he pushed his face close to hers with a hysterical grin.

"Do you want to live?" he asked her hoarsely.

Her face paling at the sudden maniac transformation, Rachel shivered as she tried to make sense of the madness going on before her. Unfortunately, her mind was still clouded due to the best orgasm she'd had in what felt like years, so as she gazed back at him through bleary eyes, the only word that could escape her dry throat was a simple "Yes..."

The Joker pulled out of her, thrust his fingers back inside her body and wiggled them around a bit, then shoved them in her face, smearing her juices and his semen across her lips.

"Because you see _this_?" he asked. "You see what you made me _do_? Do you re-_mem-_ber what I told you _last_ time, _bitch_?" He was shaking, but with mirth or anger it was hard to say. The Joker shuddered as her legs tightened around his waist, and he groaned before pushing his fingers into her mouth. "_This_ says I kill you, _but.._." He giggled hysterically. "_But_, we could come to an ar-_range-_ment, you and I, if you want to save your puh-_rec_ious _life_. Wanna _hear_ it?" He lowered himself back on top of her, squeezing his eyes shut at the feel of their chests pressing together, her stomach quivering, wrapping his arms around her waist and burying his face against her neck as her sweet-smelling hair tickled his nose.

Shivering and lying there in shock, Rachel felt compelled to wipe their mingled fluids from her lips, but she kept her hands fisted firmly at her sides. "W-what is it?" she hoarsely demanded, a soft gasp escaping her lips when she felt his body press more forcefully against hers. She longed to scream at him to stop - to tell him that he was insane - but a part of her was genuinely curious to hear what he had to say.

He giggled against her neck, sucking on it to get a hickey that would be visible unless she wore a turtleneck in the summer heat of Gotham.

"You are _mine_," he purred into her ear, stroking her hair with enough force to make her wince. "Get rid of Dent. I never want you to talk to him outside of work, _again_. I will come and go from here as I please, and you will _not_ tell the police because _if_ you do," he giggled again, "if you _do_, I'll know because let's face it, sweet cheeks, half that damned force is on _my_ payroll. And then I'll kill you." He replaced his fingers with his tongue, then pulled back to glare at her. "What'll it be, precious?"

Shivering out of both fear and arousal, Rachel glared down at him before realizing that this man - this monster - was far from the disturbingly charming, giddy individual who had shared her bed a month ago. He was different somehow, and the iniquitous flicker in his eyes made her heart clench in terror.

"Don't hurt Harvey" Rachel brokenly begged. "Please...I-I'll do whatever you ask, but only if you spare him." Running her fingers through the Joker's hair as if this would force him to see reason, she bit her lip and closed her eyes as she wondered why she'd allowed things to go this far.

"He's safe until I change my _mind_," the Joker promised her, then he shrieked with laughter. He'd won, he'd won, he'd _won_! He had a new _toy_! Now her arms and legs and lips and touches were his and his _alone_. Maybe now he wouldn't burn for her. Maybe now he could sleep better - not that he ever slept _well_, but maybe now the little sleep he _did_ get wouldn't be filled with this woman lying terrified beneath him. He would control her like she'd controlled him this past month, and then, _then_ she'd see who was _really_ in charge.

"Don't cry," he soothed, but it was scant comfort coupled with the glow of madness in his eyes. "I'll protect you, Rachel," he purred, lowering his lips to her ear and tracing its outline with the tip of his tongue. "I'll keep you safe from _everything_." He giggled again, relief sweeping through him.

Rachel shuddered, her immediate impulse being to shunt from his infuriating touch, her hands now clenching to the point that her nails left bloody half-moons in her palms. So what if she and Harvey were forced to go their separate ways? They'd been going belly-up ever since he started pandering to the public to elect him for DA, so why cry over spilt milk? Frowning, Rachel realized that no, it was much more than that...she didn't like being overpowered or owned, especially when it was by some narcissistic, egotistical, knife-wielding psychopath.

'I hope he really does like pain' Rachel thought to herself, ''cause I'm feeling pretty rough right now..."

Before she could even stop herself, she sent a tremendous uppercut across the Joker's jaw that surprised both herself and her lover. His teeth clicked together due to the impact as his head whipped to the side, a sense of gratifying satisfaction overwhelming Rachel's senses as she laid there breathing heavily, waiting for what he would do next.

"See, now _that's_ the sort of thing that's going to start getting you _hurt_," the Joker growled, turning his face back to glare at her. He grabbed her wrists and pinned them above her head, squeezing until her bones ground together. "I like your spunk, you slut, I do, but you need to _learn_ how to di-_rect_ it." The word 'slut' came out almost fondly as he sneered down at her. "What's wrong?" he asked quietly, licking her cheek like a puppy. "Do you want another shower?"

"Do I look dirty to you?" she snarled, although she secretly wished to wipe his very essence from her body. Squirming amidst his strong grasp, she gave a yelp before shrieking, "Stop it, you're hurting me!"

He let her go immediately, taking her wrists to his mouth and nipping at them gently, then kissing them as if to apologize for hurting her. She was his, she was his, she was his, she was his.

"Yes," he finally replied, "you do." With that he pushed himself up to his knees, then grabbed Rachel's elbow and pulled her up with him. "You bathe with me, or you don't bathe at all," he told her as he guided her firmly to the bathroom. She was his, she was his, she was his, she was his. "Are you on birth control?" He licked his lips as she muttered an affirmative, nodding. "You're going to take it in front of me every day. I want to _know_ that you're taking it properly." He pressed his hand against her womb with an evil snarl. "Otherwise, one quick _jab_ will solve _that_ problem _forever_." She was his, she was his, she was his, she was his. "Take those heels off and get in," he said, pushing her toward the shower after he'd started it.

Trembling at his commanding tone, Rachel gave him a biting look before uneasily stepping into the shower, a sigh escaping her lips as she welcomed the warmth of the water. When she felt the accompanying sensation of the Joker's arms about her waist, she instinctively stiffened and tried to move away from him.

"_What_," he snarled as he turned her around and grabbed her chin, "I'm not _good_ enough for you anymore? You ought to be _happy_, Rachel Marie, happy that you're not _dead_ right now. I knocked a girl up once, did I tell you?" He sneered at her again as he handed her the shampoo and sharply gestured to his hair. "Belonged to one of my men; what an abusive dick he was, too. We had to hide out at her place once in a while, and she didn't seem to understand why I wasn't yelling or hitting her. Took a shine to me because of it, I guess. So, yeah, I fucked her when her man wasn't around. She'd do _any_thing I wanted her to do, too." He grinned at the memory, then it disappeared. "So one day, she comes up to me in tears and tells me please don't be angry, she's so sorry, she didn't mean for it to happen, please, please don't be mad. I ask her what the fuck she's talking about, and she shows me a pregnancy test; it's positive." He'd forced her to start washing his hair, but she was too fascinated with his story to protest. "Well, I'm thinking shit, what do I do? Can't have a kid, oh, _no_, can't have _that_. It's a liability, a weakness, and more importantly, a way to find me. Don't need my DNA on police file, y'know. So you know what I _did_, Rachel Ma_rie_?"

He leaned his head into her hands, enjoying the rubbing of her fingers in his greasy hair.

"I burned her fucking apartment building down," he continued. "Entire damned thing. Her, the fucking fetus, all her neighbors . . . they _all_ burned for it, Rachel Ma_rie_." His voice was dropping lower and lower, and the Joker rolled his hard, cold eyes up to Rachel's horrified ones. "So I suggest you put a _smile_ on your whore face about this, or else I'll burn _you_ up, too. Do you understand how _generous_ I'm being?"

Rachel felt like sobbing at his sobering confession, but she forced her lips up into a quivering smile. _'He isn't like that anymore',_ she uneasily assured herself, _'He just needs love...someone to care for him.'_

Instantly reflecting the pity she'd felt for him during his last visit, Rachel rested her head against his chest and stroked one of his scars, her other hand running along what appeared to be a bullet wound as she listened to the frantic beating of his heart. It was soft, rhythmic, and bleeding into her senses like fluid through a civ.

He'd started out tense, but the quality of it changed now, somehow losing most of the menace as the Joker got what he wanted. He looked down at her wet head and wrapped his arms around her waist again, resting his cheek in her hair. She was afraid of him, which was good. Good, and smart of her. She _should_ fear him. But now she was giving him the gentle touches he'd been craving like one of Scarecrow's drugs, and he hummed an odd melody as he tightened his grip on her.

"Now," he murmured after a while, gently - so gently - pushing Rachel back a bit, "I can't _always_ be hurting you, because I don't like to break what's _mine_. At least, not quite so soon." That made him grin out of reflex, but it faded quickly as he stared down at her. His dark eyes were serious and if he looked a little sad, it must have been her mind playing tricks on her. "So. Show me how to be _gentle_, Rachel Ma_rie._"

Gaping up at him in astonishment, Rachel opened her mouth to speak, but immediately closed it, her breathing steadily slowing to a normal pace once she realized he was serious. Perhaps he wouldn't harm her, after all?

Taking his hand in hers, Rachel brought his palm to her lips and offered him a tremulous smile, her other hand now trailing up his torso before pausing at his jawline so that she could cup his cheek. "It's not hard" she breathlessly assured him. "In fact, I think you'll find that it's far easier than being rough."

The Joker snorted, but his eyes never left her face as he mimicked her every move. "I think you don't realize how easy it is for me to be rough," he told her in a low voice. His heart was pounding and his gut clenched, but this time it was out of nervousness at this new situation he was in. Part of him was screaming that he needed to run, to kill her, to get _away_, but an increasingly large part was telling him that he needed to be right where he was, he needed her to touch him like this some more, he needed to wallow in these sensations burning along his nerves like the hedonistic glutton he was with everything else. He could kill her the moment it became too much. Right now, he thrilled at the way his skin burned where it came into contact with hers.

Leaning forward so that her lips were grazing against the Joker's shoulder, Rachel embraced him and reveled in the surprisingly soothing sensation of his arms, her eyes fluttering closed as she raised a hand and touched his chin. "Take off your make-up" she urged, her gaze training upon the half-smeared war paint. "I want to see you, again… Please."

Although her request was innocent enough, she could tell it displeased him, her lips curling downward into a scowl as she snapped, "Well come on, just rub it off…I've already seen you, you know."

Gentle. Be gentle. He needed to be gentle with his new toy, gentle until she was wrapped around his finger and then, _then_ he could hurt her, make her suffer. Yessss . . . The Joker's snarl lost its intensity and he turned, grabbing her loofah and rubbing at his face until the greasepaint was fairly well gone.

He trailed his fingers along his scars for a moment, then pulled them back like they'd been burned before swallowing sharply, his chest painfully tight but not exactly unpleasant. Then he slowly turned back around, reaching out to tangle his fingers in Rachel's hair and tug firmly, but not harshly.

"Well?" he asked. "Get on with it."

Although Rachel wasn't particularly keen on his tone of voice, she leaned into the Joker's touch and smiled, her voice soft as she asked, "Why do you hide behind all that make-up, Joker?" She felt him tense at this unexpected question, then she rubbed her cheek against one of his scars as she added, "You're beautiful, you know...you shouldn't be ashamed of who you are."

Now nuzzling his cheek, she tipped her head so that she could pull him in for a warm, and drugging kiss, her soul shivering with delight as she allowed her arms to link about his neck. He wasn't fighting her as much as she expected, and the sensation of his marred skin beneath her hands was surprisingly sensual. Burrowing her fingers within his wet hair, she deepened the kiss and pulled his body flush against her own. She wanted to feel him, and in turn, she wanted to show him what it was like to truly feel.

The Joker growled as a shiver ran across his flesh when she touched him, his stomach twisting in disgust that was mingled with that infuriating desire for her gentle touches. She was naive to think she could fix him; she was crazy. He snorted with laughter at the thought.

"I'm not hiding, cupcakes, and I'm not ashamed," he growled without bite. "It's other people who can't stand the sight of me." He twitched, impatience winning out as her reached for her again and held her by the waist with one hand, the other pushing her legs apart as he panted open-mouthed, licking his lips. Let her play her naive little games in her naive little world. She was his. His, and that meant that he could do with her as he pleased, and right now his body was aching to be inside of her again, aching so badly that he thought he might burst from the need that only she could fulfill.

"Well then why let them win? That's what you're doing when you wear all that make-up, you know" Rachel insisted, her eyes softening as she slowly shook her head. Suddenly feeling his hand in between her thighs, she whimpered and grasped at his wrist, her gaze holding no malice as she pleaded, "No, don't…not like this. I want to know your name first."

Although Rachel knew her request might seem simple for a normal man, she truly wasn't counting on the Joker revealing his identity, the one thing that kept him from developing relationships with the hoi polloi of society. Without an identity, one didn't have to worry about getting attached to anyone, so from this standpoint Rachel decided that she could understand his ridiculous insistence upon being called The Joker.

Now bringing his roving hand up to rest in between her breasts, Rachel dropped her gaze down to her feet as she mumbled, "You really don't have to do this gentle thing, you know. I…I kind of like you, which means that I liked you before this whole 'gentle' act you're putting on, so you shouldn't feel obligated to do this for me." Finally able to return her gaze to his, she felt her body tremble as she choked out, "I…I'll give you permission to be rough, if that's what you really want."

Although Rachel's words were meant to be kind, they came out strangled and anxious.

"What if I don't _know_ my real name?" he asked her as his lip curled when she wouldn't let him touch her. "And why doesn't _Batsy_ walk around without his mask on? We like the theatrical. It's a rush. _Halloween's_ the beeeest fucking day there is, so why not have it _every_ day?" He wanted to scrape that soft and earnest look out of her eyes and his fingers clenched unconsciously, dragging along her flesh. He pushed her away, but thought better of it and dragged her back, wanting nothing more than to bury himself inside of her, deep in her body and her soul, and never leave. The thought made him growl low in his throat, but he didn't let her go.

"Quit trying to _fix_ me, Rachel Ma_rie_. You're as twisted as I am, if you liked me before this." He was scornful, his voice dripping degradation even as his hands wandered all over her body, rubbing and grasping and clawing and pinching. Inside, inside, inside, he had to get inside of her. He had to wallow in her warmth, in her insane naiveté; he had to suck her soul to fill the void where his own had fled from so long ago.

She was warm, she was wet, she was deliciously _alive_. He needed it. He needed it as much as he needed to kill, to destroy, to raise hell and disorder, and living blood welled in his mouth as he sank his teeth into Rachel's upper arm with a groan.

Crying out sharply, Rachel whimpered at the stinging sensation from his tongue flicking over her wound, her teeth clenching as she hissed, "I-I am not twisted! What the hell is wrong with thinking you're a good person? I saw how you were when we exchanged ghost stories...you were playful and almost kind. Surely you can't deny that that's a part of who you are, Joker, albeit a very slim one."

A/N: Aaaand, cut! You can finish the rest here: : / / movies . adultfanfiction ?no=600092196&chapter=9


	10. After Hours

**A/N - **Yay, a one-shot I wrote all by myself! lol It's been a while (since CH 2), but I was inspired to write this one after seeing Secretary. ;0P

"After Hours"

Blowing at the steam from her coffee, Rachel sighed as she leaned back in her desk and gazed down at her papers on the de Salmo case. "So much for going home early" she grumbled, her styled nails clacking against the desk top as she chewed on the inside of her lip.

Despite it being close to closing time, Rachel knew fully well that Harvey would kill her if he found out she'd left without reviewing the case. Forcing herself to read over the tedious information once again, she groaned and rubbed her eyes in disgust.

"Falling asleep on the _job,_ Miss Dawes?"

Jumping in surprise, Rachel stared up in shock at the tall, dark figure looming in the doorway, her voice cracking as she fearfully demanded, "H-how did you get in here? You need an ID to get through the locks!"

"Ya mean one of _theeeese?"_ the Joker crowed, his feral eyes glinting as he waved a card by his cheek.

Feeling sick at the thought of what'd happened to the owner of said ID, Rachel shrank back in her seat before whimpering, "What do you want from me? I have nothing that could be of any use to you..."

"Oh, but that's where you're _wrong,_ Miss Dawes" the Joker purred. "Ya see, I've been, uh..._following_ you, and I'd like one of those lit-tle shows you always give _Harrrvey."_ Giggling at the horrified look on her face, he gleefully added, "Imagine what Gotham would think if they knew what a lit-tle _slut_ their assistant DA was!"

Rachel's cheeks burned with indignation. "I-I am _not_ a slut!"

"No?" the Joker asked, feigning shock. "Well surely the things you did with your tongue are the works of a suh-_lut__."_

With a snarl, Rachel grabbed a pair of scissors from her open drawer and lunged for his throat, but the madman easily grabbed her by either wrist and forced her to slide across the desk. In the process, papers and pens spilled haphazardly about them onto the floor, the Joker giving a guffaw as he cooed, "Oopsyyyy! Just look at this mess!" Now digging his gloved hands into her hips to the point that they would surely bruise, he pulled her up against his growing erection and forced her hand to cup him. Noting the fury in her eyes, he drew his lips across her jaw before purring, "Mmm, that's _niiiice,_ isn't it? Just imagine how _nice_ that'll feel once it's in your _mouth."_

Panting in fear, Rachel squirmed about within his grasp, but this only succeeded in agitating her aggressor's already full-fledged arousal.

Growling, the Joker gave a soft grunt as he began to grind eagerly against her nub, Rachel giving a stifled cry as she tried to wriggle away from him.

_"Stop_ moving!" he snarled, only to backhand her before biting down on her ear lobe. When she begrudingly stopped resisting him, he gave a soft whine and licked her from her neck to her cheek, Rachel shuddering as her nipples instinctively tightened from his repulsively arousing touch. Squirming when she felt his hand trail down beneath her skirt, he smoothed his hand along her rump before giving it a firm pinch. "Turn around" he ordered, Rachel feeling incredibly bemused as the Joker's fingers began to knead the silken flesh of her upper thighs. When she failed to respond, he irritably grabbed her by the scruff of her neck and forced her around so that her cheek pressed against the desk, his lips at her ear as he snarled, "I think it'd be in your, uh...best _in-ter-est_ to listen to me, hmm?"

Shuddering, Rachel nodded meekly before she heard the Joker clear his throat and straighten behind her.

"Now" he eagerly began, "lift up your skirt."

"W-what?"

_"Lift up your skirt!"_

Terrified by the malice in his voice, Rachel shivered as she began to hesitantly reach back and draw her skirt up over her thighs, her knees quivering once she heard the Joker's breathing grow ragged with lust.

_(Aaaaaand cut! I got worried about the content of this one, so I cut it short for here. You can find the entire version either on adultfanfiction or my livejournal Jokachel community, JokerRachelFans. Look in my profile for the links)_


	11. 69 Reasons to Be Kidnapped

**A/N** -

CO-WRITTEN WITH VIRGOFEMME

Ok, so I tried to come up with a "cutesy" name/play on words for the title because of the kink request, buuut I think I failed, haha. We also managed to fit this into the Batman Kink Meme, so yay! And this is, dare I say it, _the_ filthiest thing I have _ever_ written...er...Jokachel-wise, anyway. ;0P Enjoy!

**69 Reasons to Be Kidnapped**

Rachel groaned as her bleary gaze gradually came into focus, her brows scrunching as a dull throbbing began to pound at the back of her head. She vaguely remembered going into the Gotham City Bank, only to find herself mugged and smacked over the head with a blunt instrument. She hadn't seen any faces or heard any distinguishable voices, but that didn't mean she was any less terrified by her predicament.

Just when Rachel was about to try and sit up to see where she was, she heard a soft humming in the far corner of the room that was soon followed by several soft, deep little grunts in between each measure. Who sings and _grunts?_

Careful to keep her head from moving, Rachel allowed her curious gaze to stray over toward the source of the noise, only to inhale sharply at what she saw. There, in all his terrifying glory sat the Joker, his eyes closing in utter rapture as he continued to make a quick, jerking motion with his arm. Furrowing her brows in confusion, it was then that Rachel realized his pants were...oh, they were _open,_ and he was...oh, _God!_

Feeling the sudden urge to retch, Rachel couldn't help but wonder who he was thinking of, and if it was her. Trembling ever-so-slightly, the assistant DA found that despite her tremendous disgust, she couldn't tear her eyes away from the sight of the clown prince pleasuring himself. It was alarmingly fascinating to see a man who was _so_ charmed by death, blood and destruction actually indulging himself in the baser forms of humanity. Rachel had to admit that the thought of the Joker even being the _slightest_ bit sexual had never crossed her mind, but now as she watched him stroke his length, she found that her assumptions were quite wrong.

Releasing yet another pleasured grunt, the Joker giggled slightly as he continued to pump his firm arousal, Rachel swallowing once she realized how swollen and purple his tip looked. Good God, no _wonder_ the man was such a grumpy psychopath -- if _she_ had that monster of a thing hanging between her legs, she'd probably be angry at the world, too!

Blushing over her inappropriate musings, Rachel decided to play it safe and pretend to be unconscious, but that's when she realized that the Joker's lazy, lascivious eyes were now focused directly upon her trembling form. Oh, _shit._

((Aaaaaand CUT! Sorry, but this is very, VERY graphic, and I don't recommend you read if you're, uh...easily offended by various sexual positions. lol You can find this completed on JokerRachelFans on LiveJournal OR adultfanfiction. Enjoy!))


	12. Meeting the Enemy

Alrightyyy, instead of a one-shot, this one's actually divided into 4 parts. I'm not even sure if we're done yet, but we'll see. Anywhos, this first chapter doesn't have sex (it has sexual tension though, promise! :P), but the next 3 parts are very sexual, so that SHOULD satiate your inner pervs. Keep in mind that the more comments we get, the faster I post the next part, 'cause...well...A) I've got to edit them first and that's a pain, and because of that I need an incentive, and B) cuz I'm evil like that. :P Enjoy!

CO-WRITTEN WITH CAGRLNIKKI

"Meeting the Enemy"

Whistling to himself as he walked down a back alley, the Joker began skipping as he dragged his knife against the brick wall. It made a delightful scraping sound that brought a chill to his spine, his eyes closing as he imagined his blade sinking into someone's flesh. Oh, how he longed to taste someone's blood that night...perhaps even get in a little scuffle!

Eyes alighting at the thought, he gave a giddy giggle just as he heard the telltale sound of high heels against pavement. Lurking in the shadows, he peered out from behind the wall and grinned darkly at what he saw.

"Well, well, well" he purred, "if it isn't Miss Hot Assistant DA! Can Rachel come out and play this evening? Hmmm?"

Backing up against the door when he said her name, Rachel sharply demanded, "H-how do you know who I am?!".

"How?" the Joker asked, raising his brows with a giggle. "Why, my _dear_ Miss Dawes, don't you watch GCN? You were all over the news during good ol' Harvey-kin's campaign. I recall your speech saying something like 'I buh-lieve in Harvey Dent', or some other lame slogan." Feigning a yawn, he patted a hand over his mouth before sneering. "Y'know, if I'm not being so bold -- heck, when do I _ever_ stop myself from being too bold? -- those cameras and make-up artists really don't do you justice. You're quite, uh...love-uh-ly." Giggling at the look of disgust on her face, he dared to draw nearer as she pressed herself up against her car. "Hmm, well what's wrong? Do you have, uh..._caulrophobia,_ or something?"

Watching his expressions as he came closer as she gripped her keys in her hand, Rachel listened as he spoke of watching her when she had been campaigning for Harvey, and as he feigned a yawn she could see the glimmer of cold steel from the knife he clutched in his hand. He was now only inches from her body as he studied her up and down, causing her to shiver slightly with disgust. Standing up straight, she finally managed to return, "No, I do _not_ have a fear of clowns, nor do I fear scum like you... Mr. Joker, I presume? I too watch GCN and have seen all the chaos you've caused Gotham, but no worries, you _will_ be stopped."

"Ooh-hoo-hoo, ya don't say?" the Joker mockingly returned, batting his lashes as he gave a dramatic bow. "Well, uh...I'm _honored_ that you've decided to watch my ev-er-y move, Miss Dawes, and I'm even _more_ honored that you're willing to give up time with your dear Bat toy to help catch me! He's so much _fun,_ after all, so I'd hate to think of getting in the way of you two having your _own_ fun." Leering when he caught sight of Rachel's surprised look, he lowly added, "That's right, beautiful -- I've been doing a little bit of "spying", I guess you could say, and you and Batty-cakes are mighty _close._ Why's that, hmm? Is he your _squeeeeze?"_

Tapping his Cupid against his thigh, he giggled when she claimed she was unafraid of him. "Ahhh, really? I _love_ a strong woman -- just makes them all the more fun!" Lunging forward, he seized her by the throat and slammed her back against the car door, the steel of his blade tracing along her chin as he grinned madly. "How's your tolerance of scum like me _now,_ hmm? Are you still _brave,_ my dear Miss Dawes?"

Her back still pressed against the cool steel of her car, Rachel cringed as she stared him down, not wanting to change her expression since fear was something criminals lived for, and she would _not_ fuel his power with letting him scare her. When he started to speak of her and "Batman's" relationship, the expression on her face couldn't help but change to one of surprise. After all, no one knew of Batman's true identity but herself and Alfred. "I have no idea what you're talking about...you're as crazy as you look, because I have no "relationship" with Batman."

Gasping, she felt his cold hand close in around her creamy neck as he slammed her back against her car door, his blade tracing slowly along her chin as his eyes widened with madness as they locked on her. She could feel him squeezing as she struggled to breathe, and as he asked her about her tolerance, she strained against him while managing a smirk of her own. "You are _still_ scum, and always will be...fear will not change that, Mr. Joker" she choked out, all the while fighting to stay conscious.

"Mr. _Joker?_ Come, come, why the formalities, hmm? We're all _friends_ here" the clown prince purred, a manic grin stretching his lips as he tightened his hold about her windpipe. "I figured you'd de-ny your, uh..."re-la-tionship" with Batshit, but that's alright, I'm a patient man. Everyone has a breaking point, and I'm sure that you're no different, gum drop."

Seizing her by the chin, the Joker forced Rachel to look him straight in the eye as he lowly added, "Scum I may be, my dear, but I am _far_ from being your av-er-age scum."

Rachel continued to fight the darkness that threatened her as she gasped for air, his sick grin only inches from her so she could feel his breath on her face. She heard him talk around her denying her relationship with Batman, her legs dangling from the pavement as he held her firmly up. When he seized her chin and forced her to look into his eyes, she gazed at him while laughing hoarsely. "You are definitely _not_ average scum, I'll give you that much."

The Joker suddenly released his hold on Rachel's throat, his hand now coming around her arm as he forced her around and into her car. "We're going to, uh...go for a little _drive"_ he announced, grinning as he crawled in over top of her and plopped down into the passenger's seat. "Just pre-tend everything's normal, alright, honey bunch? And then we can have a niiiiiiice, long _date._ Whaddaya say?" When Rachel looked as if she were going to denounce him, he flicked his blade beneath her chin and purred, "Or rather, which form of _yes_ are you going to tell me, hmm?"

Putting the keys in the ignition a look of frustration and anger on her face, Rachel turned the car on and looked straight ahead as she spoke in a monotone voice, "I hope you don't expect me to drive with a knife at my throat, because it would look a bit suspicious, don't you think?" She smirked a bit, her eyes meeting his.

The Joker leered at her, his knife tracing down over her chest toward her ribs as he purred, "Hmm, right you are...I'll just keep my knife right _here."_ Jabbing the tip of his blade against her side as further emphasis, he giggled when Rachel gave a yelp of surprise. "Aww, shh-shh-shh, it's only a flesh wound!" he assured her, grinning as his gloved fingers brushed through her hair. "Just drive to your apartment, al-righ-ty, beautiful? That way things will be riiiiight as rain, and no one will suspect a thing!"

Rachel could feel the tip of the cold steel knife trace down her chest and toward her ribs, flinching as he jabbed the blade against her side and feeling the warm trickle of blood ooze from the wound. Biting her bottom lip in pain, she put the car in drive and started out of the garage. She felt his fingers brush through her long, silky hair as he instructed her to drive to her apartment and she swallowed hard.

Passing through the gates and onto the streets of Gotham, Rachel started in the direction of her apartment, occasionally stealing glances over at the clown while wondering what his plans were, and wishing that Bruce was around to rescue her.

Oblivious to her discomfort, the Joker began turning on the radio and fiddling with the knobs as if they were on a normal car ride, an eager "Ah!" escaping his lips once he found a reasonable station. Pointing toward the radio with a grin, he announced, "This is one of my favorites..."Send in the Clowns", as ironic as that might be. After all, I buh-lieve you've had e-nough of clowns to last you a lifetime, right?"

Leering at her, he began to whistle and hum along with the song, his knee bouncing along with the beat as he kept stealing glances at his captive. "We almost there?" he asked, now checking his pocket watch. "I'd like to hurry up and get to the fun and games, if you know what I mean."

Staring at him as he fiddled with her stereo as if he'd actually had been _invited_ on this little adventure, Rachel rolled her eyes when he stopped at a station as the sound of "Send in the Clowns" filled her small car. It was indeed ironic, considering their current situation, and when he announced that it was one of his favorites, she simply muttered under her breath, "Figures".

As Rachel neared her apartment complex, the Joker started to fiddle with his pocket watch before asking her if they were almost there…that he wanted to get the fun and games started "I thought you knew everything about me? You should know if we are close or not" she stated in a flat and sarcastic tone.

"Ah-tah-taaah, I never said I knew _everything_ about you, just the basics" the clown prince condescendingly explained. "If I knew where you lived, where would be the fun in _that?_ I, uh...pre-fer the thrill of the chase, and that includes not knowing where my prey lives." Grinning over at her, he brushed his gloved fingers against her wound and gave an appreciative whistle. "My, my, you bleed so _prettily,_ Rrrrachel! Per-haps I'll have to cut you and see what _other_ ways you can bleed!"

Listening to him tease about not knowing everything about her, Rachel felt his fingers press against the wound on her side and she flinched in pain. As he continued to talk, she moaned softly and took a deep breath, for the pain in her side was now excruciating.

Pulling into her apartment complex, she parked in her spot and looked over at him as her eyes filled with rage "Well, here we are...now what?"

Hearing Rachel's pained moan made the Joker shiver with pleasure, his tongue absently flicking across his lips as he longed to hear her make that noise again. As a criminal, he thrived off of fear, pain, and anguish, and the young beauty was currently giving him all of the above. Grinning at her question, he placed a hand on her thigh and gave it a mocking pat. "Open the door, sugar lump, and then I'll give you further instructions."

When Rachel obediently stepped out into the parking lot, the Joker giddily crawled out after her before taking her by the arm and leading her toward the stairs. As he did so, he noticed a man coming toward them, so he quickly grabbed Rachel and pulled her into his arms. Pretending to be in a passionate embrace so he could hide his identity, his shoulders shook with silent laughter as he pressed his lips against Rachel's neck, his breath burning against her skin as he ordered in a soft whisper, "Pretend you're enjoying this." To further emphasize his point, he pressed his switchblade against her ribs. His lips were cold and clammy against her warm neck, and she closed her eyes, fighting the urge to scream until the man had passed.

Stifling a fit of giggles against her neck, the Joker finally let out a loud laugh after the man had gone on his merry way, his eyes crinkling with mirth as he exclaimed, "Good grief, woman, you call that acting? That was _terrible!_ Where was the passion? Where was the _intrigue?_ Now I know I may be an intimidatingly attractive specimen, but you're just going to have to get over that."

Giggling at his own joke, the clown prince took Rachel by the arm and gave her a firm yank so she followed him up the stairs. "What's your room number?" he demanded, his eyes sliding cautiously as he looked for other intruders.

When he asked for her apartment number, Rachel pointed down the hallway. "Number 7" she stated flatly, while a small chill ran through her as though they were being watched.

Snapping his fingers, the Joker ordered Rachel to give him her keys, to which he then proceeded to unlock the door and let them both inside. Flicking the light on, he gave an appreciative whistle as the room became unveiled from the darkness, his head bobbing as he acknowledged, "Nice digs...you pay for this all by your lonesome, Miss Assistant DA?" Grinning when she ignored him, he shut the door and took her by the elbow yet again, his arm yanking her firmly against his muscled chest as he purred, "How about we play a little _game,_ hmm? I call it "Rachel tells me who the Batman is, and every time she denies knowing his identity, I cut something off"!"

Trying to fight back, Rachel twisted in his arms, all the while trying to shake herself free. "I have already told you I don't know who Batman is!" she yelled, frustrated that she could not break free.

"Ah-tah-taaaah, now _that,_ my dear, is a bold-faced _lie"_ the Joker hissed, his playful demeanor now completely gone." Tightening his grip around her body, he placed his lips at her ear as he growled, "Now we can either do things the _easy_ way and have you tell me aaaaall I need to know, or we can do this the _hard_ way and I'll, uh...take some _drastic_ measures." As if to further emphasize his point, he slid a gloved hand down her stomach until he reached her bare thigh, his fingers caressing the soft skin as he licked the shell of her ear. When she shivered he grinned darkly, for although he wasn't particularly interested in raping Rachel, _she_ didn't know he felt that way, and that was all the leverage he needed.

Standing strong, Rachel's body tensed up as she spoke in a monotone voice once more, "I _told_ you, I do _not_ know who Batman is!" She knew he could be serious in his threats, but she also knew how important it was to keep Bruce's secret.

Furious by her response, the Joker decided to toy with her a bit more despite his lack of desire. He was a man who got off on blood and chaos, not beautiful women with soft curves. Brushing his painted lips against the curve of her neck, he licked and bit at the skin before growling softly against her flesh, his hands gripping her thighs as he began to grind his hips against her backside. "Tell me what I need to know, beautiful" he purred, his teeth now sinking into her slim neck. "Just tell me _oooone_ little name, and this will be _all_ over..."

Rachel could tell that her lack of cooperation was infuriating him, her eyes closing as she tried to block him out. She dealt with people like this everyday, and even though she was being violated by a villain, she knew she was nothing compared to Bruce. He was needed by the people of Gotham, while she, herself was expendable.

"I'm telling you, I do _not_ know who Batman is... why do you want to know so badly, unless it's out of fear?" She knew that her words would probably cost her, but she would not go down easily.

Snarling, the Joker whipped Rachel around and gave her a violent push that sent her sprawling onto the couch. Flicking out his blade, he straddled her waist and placed the knife beneath her chin, his eyes dark enough to blot out the sun as he hissed, "I want to play a few _games_ with your 'dearly beloved', but he won't _play_ them unless he has a reason to, so I figured I'd _give_ him that reason." Now pressing the blade against her skin to the point that he drew blood, he flicked his tongue across the life-bearing essence and moaned softly against her neck. Her blood tasted better than he could've ever imagined; it was pure, sweet, and full of an innocence that he longed to corrupt.

"Now" he coolly began, "I'll give you _one_ more chance, and if you don't tell me Battyboy's name, something comes off." To further stress his point, he placed his knife behind her ear as if he was going to saw it off her head.

Rachel held her hand to the wound on her neck, her own rage mixed with fear as adrenaline caused her to look up at him in defiance. "NEVER!" she spat out at him.

"Oooh, so the kitten as _claws,_ does she? You wanna play?" the Joker purred, leering down at her as he began to dig the knife painfully against the back of her ear. Watching with a sick sense of pleasure as blood began to trickle down her neck, he moaned slightly at the sight and felt a burst of arousal shoot through his limbs. The clown prince knew he was a sick man, but nothing quite like blood-loss got his adrenaline pumping. Shifting his hips, he was almost certain that Rachel could feel his desire pressing against her thigh, a shrill giggle escaping his lips upon noting her tremendous disgust. Lolling his tongue out of the corner of his mouth, he fought against the desire to lick her neck as he purred, "One more chance, beautiful, and then no more Mr. Nice Clown..."

"Oh, so you're being 'nice' now? Then I guess I can't wait to see you be 'not so nice', because I do _not_ know who Batman is, and if I _did,_ I wouldn't tell you!" She smirked back up at him, her body still twisting beneath his.

Giggling, the Joker licked his lips as he mulled over her words, his grip tightening on her chin as he purred, "True e-nough, I'm not exactly a _nice_ guy, but for you I'm willing to be _extra_ mean. How's that, hmm? Because based upon your not-so-unromantic trysts with Batboy, I _know_ that you both have feelings for one another. How can a re-lationship work without either of you knowing who the other is, hmm?" Now digging the blade more forcefully against her skin, he purposely bumped his arousal against her nether regions with a mad leer. If _that_ didn't make her uncomfortable, he didn't know what would.

Sneering up at him as he talked about his not-so-unromantic trysts between her and Batman, Rachel had to admit that he hit a nerve on that one. She had loved Bruce since they were children, and that had never changed. She had told him that as long as Gotham needed Batman, she could not be with him, but that did not stop her from loving him.

As he dug they blade deeper against her throat, she could feel him pushing up against her, and she now felt as if he would keep to his promise. "If you know that, then you should know that I can't give you his identity...he's all Gotham has left to stop people like you!"

Suddenly she heard the sound of a crash and saw a flash of black...could it be him?? Her heart began to race in her chest as she looked up to see if the Joker had heard it also.

"Awww" the Joker cooed, giving her a mocking pout as he condescendingly nodded his head. "If you tell me who Batsy is, you'll still have Harvey Butt-Chin Dent! Can't he save your puh-recious Gotham from its inevitable downfall?" Leering over her ridiculous faith in the Bat, he flinched slightly when he heard a loud crash from the opposite side of the apartment. Before he could even think to turn to investigate, a kevlar-covered fist smashed into the side of his face, a whoop of laughter escaping his lips as he crashed down to the floor.

Grinning up at the Batman, himself, the Joker began clapping as he exclaimed, "Bravo, Batsy, bra-_vo!_ Leave it to a guy like _you_ to come and make your presence known when I'm just about to have some _fun._ Your girlfriend's quite the screamer, you know...I _like_ that."

With a roar of anger, Batman lunged forward and picked the Joker up by the collar, the clown prince laughing hysterically as he felt Bruce pound the side of his face again and again.

Rachel heard him mockingly pout and leer, talking about Harvey saving Gotham when suddenly with a whoop she saw him fly backward off of her and onto the floor. As she scrambled off the couch and back up against the wall, she drew her knees up to her chest and wrapped her arms around them as if in hiding.

"Ah-tah-taaah, and you call yourself a vigilante? I thought vigilantes were supposed to _kill!"_ the Joker taunted, cackling hysterically when Batman glared down at him amidst his fury. "Why not just toss me out that window, hmm? It'd save _so_ many lives, yet for some unknown reason, you won't do it.....or rather, you _can't_ do it. Isn't that right, Rachel?"

When the Joker noticed Rachel curled in on herself, he gave another whoop of laughter and reveled in the strain he'd put her under. "My, my, Batsy, your girlfriend looks like she should take a vacation! I'd recommend Bermuda, 'cause I hear it's just _lovely_ this time of year!"

Giggling when Batman took him by the collar and slammed him down against the couch, the Joker began to kick his legs amidst his glee as he exclaimed, "Why, _Batsy,_ are you getting _fresh_ with me? Your girlfriend's right there!"

When Bruce delivered yet another uppercut to the Joker's face, the clown prince spit out a tooth and leered up at him with an excited grin. "Now _that's_ more like it!"

Through her haze, Rachel heard the Joker say her name, and lifted her head to see that Bruce was losing control. When he said that it looked like she needed a vacation, she snapped out of it and uncurled herself, standing up straight while trying to compose herself since Bruce was reacting to her pain.

Bruce had now slung Joker back across the room and down onto the same couch where he had just been torturing her, the Joker's leg kicking about as Bruce held him down while continuing to administer one blow after another. "STOP!" Rachel screamed, her gaze pained as Bruce looked up at her.

"Rachel, I..."

"What's wrong, Batty-boy? So whipped that you have to listen to Miss Priss over there?" the Joker mocked, giggling when Batman sent him a furious look. Feeling himself get pulled back up to his feet, the clown prince giggled as he was dragged over toward the door, gagging slightly when Batman tightened his hold around his throat.

Ripping the door open amidst his fury, Bruce held the Joker by the collar before growling lowly, "Get._Out",_ his arm extending as he hurtled the clown prince straight to the ground. He knew it was what Rachel wanted, and since she seemed hurt, he figured that he'd tend to her first and deal with the Joker later.

Giggling, the Joker peered inside at Rachel before cooing, "Alright, _alright,_ I'll go, but you should know that I'll be seeing you _very_ soon, Miss Dawes..." Here he winked and licked his bloody lips.

Rachel heard the Joker's laugh and watched as he licked his lips, promising to see her again soon and her whole body shook, knowing that he would keep his promise. As soon as he had scampered off, she walked over and reached out to caress Bruce's cheek, currently lost in his eyes for a moment until she was brought back to reality by the police sirens as they pulled up to her building. "You better go, Bruce" she whispered and let her hand drop back to her side.

Giving her a pained look, Bruce thought of staying a moment longer to ensure that she was one-hundred percent safe, but the look in her eyes assured him that she understood why he couldn't stay. "I'll call you tomorrow" he gently assured her, now turning his back to her as he leapt up onto the window pane. Giving her a sheepish grin, he hesitantly added, "And, uh...I believe I owe you a new window. Sorry about the mess..."

With one last longing look in Rachel's direction, Bruce vaulted off of the window pane and glided out into the night.

The Joker, meanwhile, tongued the spot where Batman had punched out his tooth, a manic grin spreading across his lips as he thought of all the dark, thrilling things he could do to torture Batsy and his little bunny...


	13. Memory Lane

**A/N** -You asked for it, so here it is (Part 2 of "Meeting the Enemy")! :) I obviously decided to keep the same angle of J's past as in my fic "Jack's Descent", only this time I added a slight twist. Either way, it's all just to fulfill our inner fangirls. xP Anywhos, this is probably the longest chapter of the 4 since they've got a matching of wits going on, but the next two are probably so much shorter since they're predominately smut. xD

CO-WRITTEN WITH CAGURLNIKKI

"Memory Lane"

Despite the fact that the Joker despised clubs, he had decided upon meeting a patron there to discuss a new "business" transaction. Almost feeling naked without his make-up, he ran a black-gloved hand across his scars as he observed the clientele. There were far too many dim-witted, obnoxious people grinding against one another for his liking, but he wasn't surprised to see such primitive, mindless simpletons partaking in _equally_ primitive, mindless activities. Rolling his eyes when a particularly buxom blonde fell into him, he shrugged off her squeaky apology and made a beeline for the bar.

Sitting down on one of the rickety old bar stools, a sudden child-like urge to spin on his seat came to mind, but he quickly shrugged it off when the bartender addressed him with a toothy grin. "What'll it be, kid?"

The Joker smirked at that. The old man didn't know the half of it, considering how Gotham was his playground, and each of his delightful weapons his toys. With a click of his tongue, he shrugged and uttered lowly, "A scotch for now -- come back later when I want something stronger."

When the bartender nodded and went off to get the drink, the Joker's eyes lazily strayed toward the woman two seats down from him. She was wearing a slinky red dress, his gaze traveling down her slender legs to observe the equally red pumps. When he directed his gaze back up toward her half-hidden face, however, he immediately gave a leer of pleasure. Why, if it wasn't Rachel Dawes, hot babe Assistant DA extraordinaire! It couldn't be... He hadn't expected to see her so soon!

With a grin that would make even a prostitute blush, the Joker carefully made his way over toward Rachel before having a seat beside her, his arm purposely brushing against hers to ensure as much discomfort on her part as possible. "Hello, there" he cooed.

After the events of that night with the Joker and Bruce, things had been somewhat crazy. Rachel had talked to Bruce on a few occasions, but their relationship had become rather strained. Bruce had reacted in a manner she hadn't seen since the day she found out he'd wanted to kill Joe Chill, and that same darkness seemed to be consuming him yet again. As if adding salt to the wound, the Joker's constant teasing and messages left all over town most certainly didn't help the situation. She really detested clubs, but Harvey had invited her to meet for drinks, and she looked at it as an opportunity to "unwind".

Sitting at the stool, the club was packed, and the heavy smell of smoke permeated toward her nose. A few drunks had purposely bumped into her, and she noticed with disgust that their eyes had roamed over her long, creamy thighs and revealing, clingy red dress. The bartender sat another martini in front of her and scurried away to serve another patron, and as she lifted the glass to take a small sip, she felt someone bump her arm. It caused her to spill some of her drink as her eyes shifted to the right, the familiar voice sending a chill through her as she dropped the glass onto the mahogany bar. "I-it can't be you!"

Rachel shifted over a bit in her seat, trying to move away from the Joker while realizing that without his makeup, no one would know he was the man whose face was plastered all over the TV and newspapers.

"Aww, shh-shh-shh, no need to get all excited!" the Joker mocked, giggling as he watched her recoil from him in fear. Handing her a napkin, he grinned as she reluctantly took it so she could clean up her mess, his fingers absently tracing along his scars as he watched her with a newfound interest. "I, uh...didn't expect to see _you_ here in a place like _this"_ he admitted, smirking slightly. "What's the occasion, hmm? Are you going to be this bar's new stripper? Migh-ty nice investment on their part, if that's the case."

Giggling at his crude joke, the clown prince took a swig of his scotch and sighed as the pleasurable burn filtered throughout his limbs, his jaundiced eyes taking her in appreciatively as he asked, "Got a date with the Bat?"

Rachel took the napkin from him as she wiped up the spilled drink. She could feel his eyes affixed on her as he stated that he did not expect to see her in a place like this, and her skin crawled when he made a comment about her being the new "stripper". The bartender glared down the bar at her, giving her an evil look (most likely for spilling her drink on his clean bar top) and she turned slightly in her stool to watch the Joker take a swig of his drink. She contemplated getting up and bolting from the stool, but she knew he was too fast for her. When he asked if she had a date with Batman, she shook her head, her hair fanning across her shoulders. "No...I'm actually meeting Harvey, and he should be here any moment."

"Ahhh, Harvey-kins, eh? Now what are _you_ two high-class schmucks doing in a run-down heap like this, hmm? Needing a get-away from the 'pressures' of daily life?" the Joker mocked, giggling slightly as he downed the rest of his drink and licked his lips. Now turning to fully face her, he leaned in close while purring, "Do I, uh..._frighten_ you, Miss Dawes? Does my very presence make you un-_com-_fortable? Hmm? Do you want to _hit _me? Do you want to cause a _sceeeene?"_ Giggling at the irritated look in her eyes, the Joker placed a hand on the small of her back as if they were old friends, his lips now coming close to her ear as he whispered, "Per-haps I can, uh..._remedy_ your fears, hmm?"

Rachel watched as he giggled and asked why she and Harvey were meeting in a place like this, and truthfully she had wondered that herself. Harvey had been acting very strange lately, and it was almost as if all the men in her life had some sort of secret they were keeping from her. As he leaned closer, he asked if he frightened her and she scoffed. "Frighten me, Joker? No. Make me uncomfortable? Yes. After all, I remember our last meeting, and still have the scars to prove it."

She flinched when he slipped his hand around her back and placed it against the small of her spine, his lips close to her ear as she held her breath from the sensation of his breath on her neck.

Feeling her tense beneath his touch, the Joker giggled while purring, "Don't worry beautiful, I'm not going to hurt you...this time I just want to _talk._ Our last encounter was more of, uh..._foreplay,_ I guess you could say, but now I buh-lieve we should move on to the real thing." Leering when he noted her fear, he quickly added, "Oh no, no, no, not _that_ kind of 'real thing', I meant _talking..._getting to _know_ one another. I'd like to know what has Batsy and White Knight all in a tizzy over you, so if you're able to hook not one of Gotham's heroes but _two,_ that must make you one hell of a woman." Sliding his tongue across his left scar, he kept his lips at her ear as he awaited her answer, all the while tempted to giggle since he knew he was making her uncomfortable.

Rachel tried her best not to show fear as he continued to purr in her ear, his warm breath still on her neck as she squirmed in her seat. Sitting straight and not flinching, she looked straight ahead while returning, "And what if I refuse this 'gracious' offer to get to know you better? What will happen then?" Her breathing increased as she waited his response, almost afraid of what it might be as her hands laid flat on the bar in front of her, the "fight or flight" instinct taking hold of her in an almost suffocating grip.

Curling his hand around the curve of Rachel's hip, the Joker roughly jerked her against him and flicked his switchblade against her waist, his lips now brushing against her ear as he purred, "I'm a-fraid that you don't have a _choice,_ beautiful. If you coo-op-er-ate, I won't have a reason to kill you, and then after our de-_light-_ful little conversation, you can go aaaall the way home to loverboy and tell him what you learned." Sniffing the intoxicating scent of her hair, he made a pleased little noise before asking, "What is that, some type of flower? It's, uh…fa-mil-liar."

Pressing his face more urgently against her hair, the Joker stifled a little whine as unbidden memories began to flow back into his mind, his hands subconsciously clenching into two tight fists as he remembered his first love. She'd smelled of jasmines and everything sweet, and her scent had pervaded into his senses to the point that he could never go anywhere near a flower for fear of smelling _her._ And now that Rachel Dawes, the bunny of all bunnies carried that telltale scent, he couldn't help but laugh at the irony. His own rival's girl smelled like _Celeste,_ and that just wouldn't _do._

Tempted to kill her right then and there to end his suffering, the Joker gave a sharp growl before pushing her away in disgust. "C'mon" he urged gruffly, hurriedly recomposing himself, "just get up."

"Why do you care what scent my shampoo is?" Rachel demanded, all the while giving him a confused look. She'd always used the same jasmine-scented shampoo and cologne since it reminded her of her days playing at Wayne Manor. She slowly stood up, flinching away from the sharp blade as he led her toward the front door. He had turned quite angry suddenly, and she did not understand why. "So where are we going?" she demanded, truly afraid to know the answer.

"Away from here" the Joker returned cryptically, his eyes narrowing at her inquisitiveness. "Just get in my car, and ask as few questions as possible."

Feeling his chest tighten painfully since he could still smell her, the clown prince took Rachel by the arm and roughly pushed her into the passenger seat of his vehicle, his eyes closing for a minute as he tried to calm his breathing. He didn't want to do something brash and kill Rachel, because she would most likely prove to be important in the future.

Moving around the side of the car and getting in the driver's seat, the Joker licked his lips and started the engine. His demeanor was cold and calculating, not a single giggle escaping his throat as he glared over at Rachel fidgeting in her seat. "Hold still! You're pissing me off" he grumbled, tightening his grip around the steering wheel.

Rachel fidgeted with her seatbelt, trying to pull it across her chest and fasten it to the best of her ability, which only seemed to irritate him even more as he quickly shot her an angry glare. Somehow Rachel sensed something different about him...he not only seemed more obnoxious, but also angrier than usual. Rachel held her head down, staring at the floor mat so she could ignore his eyes.

Re-adjusting the rearview mirror, the Joker went through the necessary safety precautions -- which, admittedly, seemed downright _ridiculous,_ considering who he was -- his gloved hands returning to the steering wheel before he pulled out of the parking space and began to speed off toward his hide-out. It was on the bad side of town (the Narrows, to be exact), but he figured that a woman of Rachel's expertise in crime would know this in advance.

Finally having calmed down, the Joker glanced in Rachel's direction before turning the radio on. A recorded speech of Harvey Dent's filled the car, and the clown prince resisted the urge to laugh. "Ahhh, nothing like some sen-ti-mental _hogwash_ to brighten the evening, eh, Miss Assistant DA?" Giggling, he gave a sigh and relaxed in his seat, a grin spreading across his lips as he gave them an absent lick. He wasn't quite sure what to say to Rachel just yet, but he was beginning to grow rather frustrated with her silence.

As they sped through town, Rachel stared out the windshield and watched the skyscrapers disappear as they headed toward the Narrows, a place she was sadly all too familiar with. After a few miles, Rachel finally broke the silence: "So, Joker...do tell what type of small 'chit-chat' we should make?" Her lips curled into a small smirk, knowing that her very presence seemed to be irritating him.

The Joker chose to ignore her question, his eyebrows knitting together as he detected the hint of a smile in her voice. Sooo, she thought she was _clever,_ did she? Rachel had undoubtedly noticed his odd bout of discomfort, but he decided to act as if he didn't hear her words, his lips pursing so he could whistle along to the tune whirring inside his head.

Tapping his fingers against the steering wheel, the Joker began to absently sway from side to side -- he always did this when he was more keyed-up than usual -- his teeth gnawing on his lower lip as he heard Rachel give a heavy sigh.

"Well what's wrong, gum drop?" he mocked. "Am I, uh..._boring_ you? Would you pre-fer that I _entertain_ you, instead?" Sensing Rachel's aversion to this option, the clown prince grinned and suddenly slammed down on the brakes, a light giggle escaping his lips as he chirped, "Weee're heeeeeeere!"

Pointing over toward a rather dilapidated building, the Joker cheerily jumped out of the car and went to the other side to help Rachel out, his arm slinking around her waist as he yanked her forward so their hips were forced together. Beginning to drag her toward the building, his grin only grew as he pushed a few wooden boards aside to reveal a door. "Home sweet home" he purred.

Gazing wordlessly up at the tall, dilapidated building, Rachel tried to recompose herself as hint of fear entered her body. She couldn't help but wonder if anyone would even find her out here if anything happened…

Humming to himself, the Joker unlocked the door -- not that anyone ever tried to break in -- and ushered Rachel inside, his voice almost cheery as he urged, "Watch your head!" Giggling when she almost bumped into the low beam on the ceiling, he grinned as he bent over and took her by her hand -- against her will, of course -- and led her toward the backroom.

"This is where the devil sleeps" he explained, obviously referring to himself. Moving his arm in a grand sweep, he showed her a musty room with a simple fold-up chair, a card table, and a cot. Strewn across the card table were various plans and drawings, each accented with painted words of ridicule. He'd defaced various newspapers as well, Harvey's face being one of the most notably scribbled on. Grinning when he noticed Rachel's horror, he folded his arms and proudly asked, "Well, whaddaya think? Everything you expected and more? We even have _rats_ here! I've taken the liberty of naming them Squeakers and Max."

As soon as he swung open the door the dank and musty smell penetrated her nostrils, Rachel wrinkled her nose as she took in their surroundings. "What do I think?" she reiterated. "Well, I guess I can say this is what I expected from a madman such as yourself." Picking up one of the clippings, she held it for a moment while staring at the picture. When she heard his comment about his pet rats, she surprisingly didn't react. Rats, after all, were the _least_ of her worries at the moment. Smirking, she finally spoke again, "Well, at least you actually have some friends here."

The Joker sneered at her quip, watching her carefully as he stuffed his hands into his coat pockets. "Well, uh..._you're_ my new friend by default, I'm afraid. Sit down, sit down....if you can find a place." Grinning, he motioned toward his cot as he had a seat by the card table, his legs crossing at the ankles as he leaned back and got comfortable. Scratching his chin, he watched her with dark eyes as she seemed to be deciding whether or not his cot was kosher, a slight giggle escaping his lips as he assured her, "Don't worry, I uh...actually _do_ wash my bedding. I may not look like I bathe much, but I bathe just e-nough to keep myself healthy."

Smirking as Rachel finally had a seat, the Joker leaned forward and folded his hands in between his knees. "What do you think of me, hmm? Do I _scare_ you? Are you a-_fraaaaid_ of me, Miss Rachel Ma-_rie?_ Does it ex-_cite_ you to know that I've chosen you, and _only_ you to see my humble abode? Are you _flattered?"_

Crossing her long, slender legs, Rachel shook her head. "I believe I have told you once before that I'm not 'afraid' of you, and as far as being 'excited' or 'flattered' that you choose, I suppose you could say I'm more intrigued as to _why_ you chose me, Joker. Why am I so 'privileged' to be the one?" Her smoky eyes never leaving his as she studied him, she couldn't help but wonder who the man without the paint truly was.

The Joker gave a huff at her question, his head shaking slightly as he asked, "Well isn't it obvious, honey bunch? You've managed to shoot Cupid's arrow at not only the Bat, but good ol' White Knight Dent, and that takes a _looot_ of a certain "something" in a woman. I'd like to know _why_ you've captured their in-ter-est, 'cause surely it takes a special kind of person to reel in Gotham's finest." Studying her with his dark eyes, the Joker briefly forgot that he wasn't wearing his face paint and immediately turned away, suddenly uncomfortable with her intense scrutiny. Sitting so that she could only see his profile, the clown prince placed a hand over his chin to further conceal his scars, a slight sneer tugging at his lips as he asked, "Not afraid? I don't buh-lieve that's possible, beautiful..._everyone's_ afraid of what they don't understand, and you've already mentioned once that you didn't understand me at all."

Rachel was rather shocked by the statement, because true, she _had_ been involved with Bruce and Harvey, but she just happened to love two of Gotham's heroes and she felt a sense of pride in being part of their lives. She caught a glimpse of something different for a moment in the Joker's eyes before he quickly turned away from her so that she could only see his strong profile, his hand moving over his chin as if he were trying to conceal his scars.

She heard him mumble that everyone was afraid of what they did not understand, and she had already told him she did not understand him. On that point he was correct, because the only thing that frightened her was her inability to figure him out and see inside his dark heart. "Well...on that you're right, because I _don't_ understand you, and that makes you dangerous, but not frightening. Now as for Batman and Harvey, why do you believe I have, as you say, 'captured' their interest? We're all merely dear friends!"

The Joker rolled his eyes, once more turning to face her as he scoffed, "Do you, uh...actually buh-lieve I'm _that _blind, beautiful? When I had you trapped in your apartment, he practically _murdered_ me since I had you in my control. He's never, uh...gone that _far_ with me, if you get my drift, so you cuh-_lear-_ly mean a whole lot more to him than some mere acquaintance. As for Harvey-kins, I've seen how he looks at you, so he's definitely in love with you, as well. What do you have, an amazing sexual technique of some sort?"

Giggling slightly at his crude remark, the Joker rose from his perch and went to a small set of drawers in the corner of the room, his hands hurriedly opening the top drawer before removing two objects. Quickly unscrewing the cap of his round-shaped container of face paint, he smothered his face in the white goop and immediately felt better since he was hiding behind his mask. When he was this monster, it was _ok_ to be considered a creature, but he didn't like the looks he received _without_ the facepaint -- that meant he was a monster in his own skin, and that left him with an almost nauseating sensation clawing in his gut. Rubbing a small amount of red face paint onto his lips and scars, the clown prince finally turned and regarded Rachel with a sneer. "Muuuuch better...now, where were we?"

Rachel listened as he rolled his eyes and scoffed at her denial. It was true that Bruce had completely lost it that night at her apartment, for he'd lost control of his emotions, and she also knew that Harvey had feelings for her ever since she'd taken the position as Assistant DA. When he asked if it was some amazing sex technique that kept them coming, she blushed and then scowled at him. "How _dare_ you even ask that question!? My sex life is none of your business!"

After Rachel realized that the Joker had put his face paint back on, she gave him a saddened look and shook her head. "That wasn't really necessary...or do you just prefer to 'hide' behind the paint? Does it make you feel more powerful?"

The Joker's telltale smile vanished from his face in an instant, his eyes like two fiery embers as he whipped out his knife and stormed toward Rachel in a fury. Seizing her by the hair, he pushed her back against the wall before slamming his blade into the message board behind her head, his features contorted in a frenzied snarl as he growled, "Now you listen to me, Miss Rachel Ma-rie _Dawes,_ we aren't in the courtroom or your own home anymore, so only _I_ ask the questions! If you want to, uh..."figure out" why I'm the way I am, I suggest you become a psychologist!"

Straightening his stance, the Joker took in a heavy breath before stabbing his knife into the card table, the deadly weapon wobbling back and forth before growing completely still.

His breathing was heavy and erratic, and Rachel's heart raced as she looked up at him, her ears ringing form the force of the blow to her head as she felt a warm trickle down the back of her neck. She knew she was probably bleeding, her eyes becoming unfocused for a moment before she shook her head. "A-alright, then start asking..."

Somewhat surprised by her comment, the Joker sneered at her before returning, "What, aren't you going to fight me on this, beautiful? Where's that de-light-ful bite you always have, hmm?"

Slowly sinking into his chair, the clown prince rubbed at his thighs as he studied her face, his eyes narrowing as he asked, "What do you think of my 'cause', hmm? Do you, uh..._understand_ it? Do you at least see why I'm trying to _save_ this city?"

"Your cause?" Rachel asked, giving him an inquisitive look. "Well maybe you could start by explaining your cause, and how more crime is supposed to 'save' Gotham."

The Joker giggled slightly, shaking his head. "Ah-tah-taaah, my crime is merely bringing about survival of the fittest. I'm helping to weed out all of those pa-_thet-_ic stragglers who just bring this city down. The smartest will survive, and the slow and dimwitted will die out. It's how nature was _meant_ to be, beautiful, so y'see, I _am_ saving Gotham with my crime." Grinning, he cheerily added, "Besides, I'm trying to open your _eyes_ so you can see that you're all a bunch of blind mice running through a maze. The kicker is it's a _never-ending_ maze, but none of you seem to re-a-lize that you're being oppressed. Are you really that stupid, or are you just content to live in blissful ignorance?"

Rachel rubbed the back of her head where it had hit the wall, trying her best to grasp everything he was saying as she leaned forward, still a bit a bit dizzy as she steadied herself by clutching each side of the cot with her hands. "So the reasoning behind your madness is survival of the fittest? Am I included in the "pathetic stragglers" that bring the city down?" She heard him add that he was trying to open her eyes to show her she was being oppressed. Shaking her head, she softly added, "I don't believe I live in blissful ignorance. I thought that what I do is help right the wrongs of Gotham...if we are both trying to 'save' Gotham, how are we so different?" His words were confusing her, and the room seemed to be spinning as she closed her eyes to make it stop.

"Because _you_ buh-lieve in letting those goons who run our country take control, and _I_ do _not._ I want us to, uh...introduce a little _anarchy,_ and despite the fact that sheer chaos will take control, it'll all even out e-ventually" the Joker returned, a little irritated with Rachel's questions. He noticed her eyes going in and out of focus and cursed, his lips twisting into a scowl as he rose and moved over to her. Bending her forward so that her head was in between her knees, he coarsely ordered "Stay there -- if you have a concussion, you don't need your blood rushing to your head."

Moving over back toward his cabinet, he grumbled something about having to "babysit a stupid assistant DA", his expression growing all the more sour as he fetched some gauze and a towel and returned to Rachel's side. Kneeling down in front of her, he pressed the towel against her head and muttered, "Keep that pressed down and it should stop the bleeding. Trust me, I uh...have a _lot_ of experience with this type of thing."

Rachel listened as he spoke of introducing a little anarchy, and how even with sheer chaos everything would eventually "even" out. She was about to say that Batman and the others would never allow that to happen when she felt his hands on the back of her neck, pushing her head between her knees as he ordered her to stay there. She could hear him grumbling and cursing under his breath about having to babysit her before he came back, now pressing a towel against the back of her head while he told her to keep pressure on her wound. It was a different side of him, and she had to admit that he confused the hell out of her more and more every time they met. Flinching slightly at the pain the injury caused, Rachel held the towel to her head she straightened back up into a sitting position. "Thank you."

The Joker snorted, refusing to meet with her gaze as he grumbled, "Well what're you thanking _me_ for, hmm? I'm only giving you a hand since I don't really feel like disposing of a body tonight, not to mention that I may _need_ you in the near future. Batsy's no easy guy to mess with, after all, so sometimes all it takes is a little 'elbow grease'."

Giving her a meaningful look, the clown prince chuckled before moving his chair closer to her, a slight grunt escaping his lips as he sat back down and sighed. "Do you, uh...finally see where I'm coming from, honey bunch? Do you understand my _need_ to bring Gotham back to its roots of anarchistic control? 'Cause y'see, if you think that those governmental slobs give a damn about you, you're _wrong._ The mayor doesn't care, the governor doesn't care -- _nobody_ cares, 'cause when it all comes down to it, everyone in this world is only looking out for number one. You do it, and I do it -- there's no use in denying that you'll always do what's for your own best interest, so if you get a job opportunity from another company, you're damn well going to take it. It doesn't matter _who_ you have to step on in the process to get there, because in the end _you_ will come out on top." Now smirking, he cheerily added, "And now that Gotham's in such a tough, _tough_ time, some are beginning to panic because it seems like no one's there anymore. Politicians used to say that _God_ was there for us, but now that's not the case anymore, and when you take a huge figure like God out of the e-quation, people begin to panic. There's no turning back from this, beautiful, because whether you like it or not, this city _will_ move on with or without you."

Her head a bit clearer now, Rachel sat up a bit. "So basically what you're saying is I need to get on the 'right' side, or I'll be left behind? How do you know that your so-called 'anarchistic buddies' out there won't turn on you? I mean, like you said, everyone is out for' numero uno'." She had not seen a downfall like he spoke of beginning yet, but of course like a building, if you take out the pillars of the foundation, the building will crumble.

The Joker scoffed at Rachel's musings, his head shaking as he returned, "In case you didn't notice, I don't _have_ any friends, Miss Dawes. How can my so-called "anarchistic buddies" turn on me if I have no one to begin with? I'm one of the former stragglers who learned to make do with what I have, so I _use_ people to get what I want. And before you say I'm a monster, or blah blah blah, just know that I'm abiding by the law of this country: use or _get_ used. Don't you know that even _Harrrvey_ is using you? Having a female on the team makes them look good and more, uh...'diverse'."

Leering at the look on her face, the Joker folded his hands and giggled. "Well what's wrong, dollface? Did you just suck on a _lemon,_ or are you happy to see me?"

Rachel's brow furrowed as she huffed and adjusted her position on the cot. He took pleasure in watching her reaction as he sat back, his hands folded as he giggled in delight.

"Maybe I am an optimist and try to see the good in everyone" she finally agreed, "but that's because I try and believe everyone has some good in them...somewhere. And according to your logic, you and Harvey are a lot alike if he's using me. You use people too, so there is no real difference"

"Ah-tah-taaah, you're missing the point" the Joker argued, waggling his finger as he gave her an almost disappointed look. "People are inherently _evil,_ because once they're capable of having a proper thought process, they're o-fficially devoid of all innocence. Why do you think parents try to shield their brats, hmm? It's because they _know_ what humans are capable of, and that with the right -- or in your case, _wrong_ -- influence, all hell will break loose."

Grinning at Rachel's declaration, the Joker shook his head with a giggle. "True, but he's missing the one thing that _I_ have: common sense. He can't just rid this city of corruption, because it's been fermenting here since the dawn of time. It's so deeply rooted in our veins that it can't just be _terminated_ by one man during his term as our DA. 'Cause y'see, dear _Rachel,_ it's too late for that...the fight for Gotham's soul already has a winner, and it sure as hell isn't Dent."

"Soooo...I suppose you're saying my fight is over? Or I am fighting for the wrong side? Is that what you're saying?"

The Joker snorted, shaking his head as he condescendingly returned, "Now peaches, why should _I_ tell you what side you're on, hmm? You're a bright, beau-tee-ful young woman...or at least, I _think_ you are -- so the choice is yours to make. I'm only, uh...helping you _along,_ so to speak. I don't buh-lieve that you understand just how important this conversation of ours is, 'cause this is a veeeery important de-cision to make."

Clicking his tongue when he noticed Rachel swaying, the Joker rolled his eyes and begrudgingly rose from his perch, his weight sinking down alongside her as he semi-roughly pulled her toward him. Bending her slightly over his lap, he parted her hair and inspected her wound, rolling his eyes agains as he muttered, "Alright, alright, lie down before you, uh..._hurt_ yourself. Or at least, hurt yourself _again."_

Giggling slightly since he knew that _he_ was the cause of her pain, the clown prince helped Rachel down onto her back before murmuring, "There, now are _these_ the actions of a monster? Hmm? 'Cause the way I see it, you're all just _scared_ of me, so you don't re-a-lize that I'm trying to _help_ Gotham escape its oppression. I'm ahead of everyone since I can see through the cheap lies, the deceit...the _true_ monster is mankind, not me."

When the Joker brushed a few stray strands of hair from her face, Rachel became even more confused. At one point his words made sense, and even though he was the cause of her injury, he seemed to be genuinely concerned for her well being. She closed her eyes for a moment and tried to focus...to figure him out.

"Ah-tah-taaaah, no sleeping!" the Joker scolded in a sing-song manner, immediately tapping Rachel's cheek until she opened her eyes. "If you really _do_ have a concussion, you may not wake back up...buh-lieve me, I know aaaall about this medical stuff. I get blown to pieces on a daily basis!" Giggling, he gestured to his scars before adding, "And buh-lieve it or not, this was my first test as a 'physician'. I've managed to perfect my 'sewing' techniques by now, so it's a pity I wasn't gay with a secret sewing fetish when my face got cut to ribbons. Might've helped with the _healing_ process, if you know what I mean."

Absently running his tongue along his lower lip, the Joker frowned under Rachel's intense scrutiny, his eyes narrowing as he snarled, "Why are you looking at me like that, hmm? I'm not your Knight in Shining Kevlar, so don't go thinking that I'm being a 'nice guy', 'cause I'm _not._ I have perfectly le-git-i-mate reasons for needing you alive, you know."

Rachel cast her green eyes upon him again, demanding irritably, "And what would that reason be? I mean, I have listened to your reasoning as to why you are Gotham's 'savior', and you've shown me two different sides of everything, including yourself... So what am I to you? What is my purpose?"

The Joker sneered at her question, shaking his head as he snidely assured her, "Don't worry, beautiful, I'm not interested in _that,_ if that's what your typical female mind is thinking. Like I said before, I'm in-ter-ested in being Gotham's _better_ class of criminal, so rape and petty theft is completely beneath me. I need you for a, uh..._higher_ purpose, if you will. I'm a-fraid that I can't tell you what that something is, because then I highly doubt you'd be such a willing participant. Not that you have much of a choice, though, considering your present condition."

Giggling slightly, the clown prince reiterated, "I've, uh...shown you _two_ different sides of me? I'd like to think that I'm far more multi-faceted than _that,_ but whatever you say, gorgeous. What have you learned then, hmm?"

Rachel's eyes met his again and she tossed her head lightly, a few soft brown wisps of hair clinging loosely to the side of her cheek. "Oh, I'm sure you are a very complex man, and that there are many sides to you that I haven't had the 'pleasure' of seeing, but what I've learned is unimportant...after all, did you not tell me earlier I wasn't a psychologist?" She smirked and laid her head back down, unsure of his next move and where his little game was leading.

"Ahh, well I see that the snarky side of your brain was unaffected" the Joker gibed, grinning as he began fiddling with the lapels to his shirt. "You're completely right about not being a psychologist, beautiful, but everyone with a functioning mind is capable of making an analysis. Are you no longer afraid of me, or is that just your banged up head leading you into delusion? Either way, I win."

Sneering, the clown prince got up from the cot and went to a small fridge in the far corner of the room, his knees popping as he crouched down and opened the door. "Hungryyyy?" he asked in a sing-song manner, eagerly rummaging through the refrigerator in search of something decent. "Because a crazed lunatic sure works up an apetite... I'm sure that being a sane, rational being is no different in that de-partment."

Finally settling on a half-eaten sandwich, the Joker took a sloppy bite before turning to her with a crumb-filled grin. "As we approach your impending 'debut', just know that I'll also be looking for multiple facets in _your_ character. You're not the only one making analytic conclusions here, Miss Dawes."

Swinging her legs over the edge of the cot, Rachel slowly sat back up and watched as he knelt in front of the open door, rummaging through the contents and asking if she was hungry. "No...no thank you, I'm fine, and to answer your question, no, I'm not afraid of you…just intrigued by you." It was strange how they both seemed to be analyzing each other and sizing up the other's next move.

"Hmph, suit yourself" the Joker returned, shrugging as he practically shoved the rest of the sandwich into his mouth. Chewing noisily before swallowing, he scratched his left scar and winced slightly at the burn. His skin was always very sensitive there, and perhaps it was all in his head, but every now and then they would actually _hurt_ there.

Rachel watched as he scratched the scar on the left side of his face, and he winced slightly as if it was painful. She frowned, feeling a bit of remorse over him having to bare those scars for all his life, and when he looked over at her sitting up, he advised her to be careful that she may get dizzy. Taking his advice, she sat there for a moment on the edge of the cot before standing up, smoothing out her dress as she walked toward him and took a seat on the edge of the small table. "Do they hurt you often?" she asked, reaching out and slowly brushing the tips of her fingers against the raised scar beside his lip.

Jumping up from the table as if he'd been burned, the Joker staggered backwards as he knocked over his chair amidst his confusion, his eyes wild and animalistic as he regarded her in complete bewilderment. "Don't touch me" he choked out, his limbs still trembling from the sudden adrenaline-rush. "Don't, just...._don't."_

Scowling since Rachel had seen him at his most vulnerable point, the Joker snarled and turned his back to her, shrugging as he grumbled, "How do you figure they hurt me? They're just like every other thing on my body...an adornment that I can't e-rase, no matter how hard you will things to change. I didn't ask to be the way I am, but I don't particularly mind, either. You, uh...you tend to get used to it."

Gripping his fists at his side, the Joker kept his back faced to her as he swallowed sharply.

Rachel snatched her hand back when he jumped to his feet, her eyes wide since she hadn't been expecting him to react so violently from a simple touch. She swallowed before mumbling, "I...I'm sorry, I didn't mean... How did it happen?" She continued to sit there, staring at the back of his curly hair as his shoulders rose and fell with his rapid breathing.

The Joker laughed humorlessly. "What, you mean one of my little stories, or the _real_ story? 'Cause, uh...I'm a-fraid it's not as _in-ter-es-ting_ as you'd think. It's why I make up different tales....that, and because after a while I begin to buh-lieve that the real story isn't true. Sometimes it helps."

Turning slowly toward her, the clown prince was grinning lopsidedly, his head shaking as he leaned back against the wall with a sigh. "Seven years old...thaaaat's how old I was, I buh-lieve. Young, innocent, and as happy as a brat my age could be. I had a little four-year-old sister who meant the world to me...Angel, if you really need to know. I always found that name appropriate, 'cause uh...she had these big, pretty blue eyes that were like an angel's." Smiling crookedly, the Joker didn't really seem like he was telling the story to Rachel any longer, but to himself, his eyes casting up toward the ceiling as he sighed heavily. "One day the old man came home in a rage, raving about how his life was over, and blah blah blah. We all knew that he went to the hospital that day, but we didn't expect that he'd come home diagnosed with cancer. He was understandably upset, but I didn't think he'd take his illness out on the three people he was supposed to _love."_

Grinning without mirth, the Joker shrugged and slumped further back against the wall. "Angel and I heard mother's scream on the other end of the house, but by the time we got to her, our father was standing over her dead body with a kitchen knife in his hand. He then came toward us with this big, sick _grin,_ his tone almost taunting as he asked, "Why so serious, kiddies? Where are my _darrrrling,_ smiling little jokers? You look _upset"..."_

Twisting his lips, the Joker exhaled deeply before glancing down at his shoes. "We _were_ upset, but Angel was the one in tears. Father didn't like that... Not. One. _Bit._ He took my little sister by the hair and yanked her up into his arms, and all I could do was watch on in terror as he hacked away at her face. She kept screaming and _screaming_ at me to save her, but I couldn't do a damn thing... I was completely frozen. Before I could catch hold of my wits, he slit her throat and let her fall at my feet." Pausing, the Joker's eyes grew hollow at the memory, his features darkening as he curled his hands into two tight fists. "I, uh...don't really think I need to say what happened next. My scars are the testament to my sins...for my lack of responsibility."

Not bothering to mention Celeste or the other pains from his life, the Joker looked up at Rachel with a lopsided smirk. "Aaaand there you have it...in a nutshell, anyway."

With each word Rachel had grown deeper into the story as he'd described his sister, and she could almost picture Angel with the bright blue eyes and golden hair...so innocent and sweet. She remembered being around seven when the Wayne's had died, and her mother had taken her away. Her eyes still glued to his as he finished, she gave him a pained looked while asking, "God, how could you blame yourself for that? You were only a boy! It was _not_ your sin...it was your father's." She gave a soft sigh and looked down at the floor for a moment, afraid to show the emotions in her eyes, fearing he would use them to play on her own feelings.

The Joker snorted. "I was old e-nough to do something other than stand there like a slack-jawed idiot. Angel _asked_ me to help her -- she _begged_ me, but even then I did nothing. If there's anything I've found, it's that people come and go, but the impressions they leave on you last a lifetime. I'm _still_ waiting for Angel to disappear from my mind, but everywhere I look, everywhere I turn.....she's there."

Eyeing Rachel with a quirked brow, the Joker observed her bowed head and fidgeting fingers, his lips twisting as he grumbled, "Why do you care so much, anyway? It's not like I _asked_ to be pitied."

Rachel looked back up at his question, suddenly a little embarrassed. "Perhaps we all have impressions that we wish to forget...maybe we have to forgive ourselves in order to let go." Her eyes met his again, and she managed a weak smile. "I am _not_ giving you pity...I'm just trying to show you someone cares, and that everyone isn't evil."

The Joker scoffed at her words. "You don't give a _damn_ about me, alright, beautiful? Why would you have any reason to care, hmm? Are you trying to say we're destined to commiserate over a bottle of gin?" Leering slightly, he leaned in closer when he noticed her eyes were refusing to meet with his. Drawing as close as his comfort would allow, he brushed his lips against her ear as he asked, "What is it about me that makes you _care,_ hmm? Just because I have a daaaark, spooky past?"

Smirking when he thought he heard her breath hitch in her throat, he relished in her discomfort since she'd had the nerve to make _him_ uncomfortable first.

Swallowing hard, Rachel was finally able to speak: "No, it has nothing to do with your "dark" past...I am human, and not all of us are uncaring and selfish. Even though you wish to see us that way to make yourself feel better, it's not always true."

The Joker scowled at her words, yet he remained where he was so she couldn't see his irritation. Hoping to further disturb her, he pressed his cheek against hers and purposely rubbed the scar tissue against her skin, relishing in the tensing of her muscles as he sat down in her lap. "True, not _everyone_ is uncaring and selfish, but the _Bat's_ the only one who's truly incorruptible in this city. There are _millions_ like you and I, however, and I have every reason to buh-lieve that you're full of shit. I kidnapped you, possibly gave you a concussion, and now I'm supposed to buh-lieve that you feel _sorry_ for me?"

Rachel felt him press his warm cheek against hers the scars rough against her smooth flawless skin and she tensed up slightly as he sat down in her lap, her heart now racing in her chest. Trying to calm her breathing, she sat there with her hands hanging loosely at her sides. "Perhaps part of being human is to forgive...maybe that is what you need, to "forgive" yourself for not being able to save Angel…to see that sometimes it all begins with forgiving ourselves first." She had seen a different side in his eyes when he'd spoken of his sister...the one of the person before the scars and the hate had consumed his soul.

The Joker felt a burning sense of scorn at her words, his eyes narrowing when a familiar ache began to flare within his breast. "Shut up" he urged, his voice barely above a whisper. "You don't know _anything_ about my life, so don't act as if you can psychoanalyze everything with your condescending, self-righteous opinions! If you want to analyze something, analyze _yourself._ After all, what's a prim, proper assistant DA doing with a psychopathic, mass-murdering clown? And before you say you've been kidnapped, just re-a-lize that you've been talking to me this whole time of your own free will. I never _once_ put a gun to your head and ordered you to speak, and I _especially_ didn't tell you to touch my scars."

Reaching down to grab Rachel's wrist, the Joker roughly forced her hand against his cheek, his eyes almost animalistic as he purred, "This is what you wanted, right? To touch the face of a _freak?_ To, uh...pre-_tend_ that you understand me, and to pet my scars like I'm a _dog?"_ When Rachel didn't answer, he traced his scarred lips from her cheek to her ear, giggling softly as he cooed, "Silly, silly bunny...what were you thinking, hmm? That you could _change_ things for me? That you could get me to _magically_ see the light and find my way back to innocence? 'Cause I'm afraid that things don't work that way, beautiful -- once the virtuous fall, there's no turning back."

Keeping his lips close to her ear, the Joker closed his eyes when her perfume began to permeate his senses, wisps of golden hair and brilliant hazel eyes appearing in his mind as he gave a soft whimper. Clinging to Rachel like a drowning sailor to a buoy, the Joker pressed his lips to her neck and gave a shuddering intake of breath. His movements were almost tender and reverent, his tongue lightly caressing her skin as he slowly ran a hand up her thigh.

Rachel closed her eyes when she heard him give a soft whimper, his lips trailing down from her ear and down to her neck as he gave a shudder. Feeling as if the air had been sucked from her lungs, she gasped for breath, her head tilted back slightly at the soft and tender movements.

Lost in Rachel's softness, the Joker buried his face in her hair and inhaled more deeply, his hands stroking up along her sides until he gently cupped her breasts. His actions were the exact opposite of his brutal nature, but all he could see in that moment was the former object of his affections. Her eyes were laughing as she smiled, her long, honey-blonde hair framing her sweet face like a soft nimbus.

Kissing along Rachel's neck, the Joker groaned as he shifted his hips in obvious discomfort. Needily pressing his desire against her thigh, he crashed his mouth against hers before storming his tongue past her lips, his fingers weaving through her hair as he began to breathlessly grind in between her legs.

Just when it seemed as if the Joker had lost all control, he suddenly came back to earth when an unfamiliar sound reached his ears. That sweet, breathless gasp wasn't Celeste's....it was someone _else's._ Panicking, the clown prince jolted away from Rachel's welcoming body and fell to the floor, his eyes comically wide as he gazed up at her in bewildered horror.

Rachel felt him as he buried his face in her hair, his hands stroking slowly and sensually along her sides and cupping her breasts, causing her to moan softly from the sensation. Gripping both edges of the seat she felt his kisses trailing down her neck, and as his hips moved, she could now feel his growing desire. His lips pressed wildly against hers, and his tongue darted past her lips and meet hers in a duel of heated passion. Her head was swimming, and her body felt on fire as she met his hips as they thrust together. Rachel hadn't felt desire in a very long time, and the Joker had suddenly awakened the dormant emotions. As their kiss broke, she gasped as their bodies moved together and without warning, she opened her eyes to see him fall to the floor as he sat there gaping at her. Her breathing was rapid as she stared at him, and the silence that filled the room was only broken by the beating of their hearts.

In normal case scenarios, the Joker would've laughed at Rachel's reaction to his touch and teased her for liking it a little _too_ much, but this situation was much different. _He'd_ enjoyed himself as well, and the mortifying testament to that was the visible bulge in his pants. How could he have mistaken Rachel for Celeste when they were so different? And yet....they weren't. Celeste had been an infuriating optimist as well, but that didn't mean he wanted to replace her, _especially_ with some empty-headed attorney.

Feeling sick with self-loathing, the Joker staggered to his feet before pointing a shaking finger toward the door. "Go" he urged, his gaze panicked and ireful. "I don't care _how_ you get home, just _leave!"_

Rachel's body began to shake as he sat there looking at her with a mortified look on his face, and she soon came to the realization that she, too, was shocked at the fact that she had not been appalled by his touch, but the complete opposite. He had awaken desires from down deep inside her.

When the Joker staggered to his feet, gripping the chair with one hand and pointing a shaking index finger with the other, he ordered her to go and she staggered to her feet, her head still swimming as she steadied herself for a moment before casting her deep green eyes upon him. "I…I'm sorry" was all she could utter as she headed toward the door, knowing she would soon be alone in the bowels of Gotham City.

The Joker had to admit that he was stunned she took his order so easily. He'd been expecting an argument that would last well into the night, but instead Rachel had gotten up from the chair and left without another word. Realizing that his mouth was still agape, he irritably closed it and ran a finger across his scars. The fact that his Bat bait was affecting him would _not_ do, so he either needed to get over his odd reactions to her scent, or he needed to find a new distraction for Batsy. And yet... The Joker sneered. He _could_ kill Rachel Dawes -- that'd not only end his infuriating attraction, but get to the Bat and a serious way.

Giddily clapping his hands, the clown prince sat down at his desk and began to furiously scribble down a series of notes. For the first time in months, the Joker felt himself smiling a true smile since he would finally be rid of one _serious_ problem.

**A/N** - 2 more parts left of this. :)


	14. An Honest Mistake

**A/N** - Sorry guys, I honestly forgot that I hadn't posted this...I know you'll forgive me, though, because ze SMUT is in this chapter! ;P And OMG, what happened to this site? It used to be my safehaven from JokerBatman, but now it's teeming with that gook! GAAAAH! I swear to God, slash is STALKING me! lol Sorry if you like them, but it creeps me out...J killed the love of Bruce's life, so THERE! Anywhos, whatever...here's the story. :P

WARNING: Wild, animalistic, Jokachel SMUT, ahoy!

CO-WRITTEN WITH CAGURLNIKKI

"An Honest Mistake"

It was another cold and miserable night in Gotham, so the patrons of Al's were drinking away the chill with their favorite poisons. The Joker was by far no exception, except he was there on personal business. He'd heard through the grapevine that Harvey Dent was celebrating some success or another, and the lovely Rachel Dawes was to accompany him. Smirking at the thought, the clown prince allowed his finger to trace the rim of his shot glass, a sudden chill alerting the customers to the presence of new arrivals.

Looking up in expectance, the Joker barely suppressed a sneer when the man of the hour himself arrived, his petite paramour at his side bedecked in yet another dress that'd make the men howl for an encore. If one thing was certain, that woman never left the office without looking her best.

Turning himself at an angle, the Joker smirked as he lifted his glass to his lips. He wanted her to see him, but in such a way that wouldn't cause her to panic.

Oblivious to the attention she was receiving, Rachel brushed her lips against Harvey's cheek. "So how does it feel to be the man of the hour?" she asked taking a seat on the soft leather seat beside him. Listening to him speak of his debate and his new plans for Gotham, Rachel sat back and tried her best to pay attention to what he was saying. Absently gazing about them at the various faces, she couldn't help but gasp when her eyes suddenly met the Joker's. His glass was lifted to his mouth, and his lips were formed into a perfect smirk.

"Are you alright Rachel? You look a bit pale" Harvey said as she turned her head to see him still on his stool, watching her every move as her heart began to race "Y-Yes, Harvey, I'm fine...perhaps it was something I had for lunch."

Having heard her comment, the Joker couldn't help but giggle. _'The old "something I ate routine"?'_ he thought, tisking as he set his glass back down. _'Really now, Miss Dawes, I would've expected better from you...'_

Grinning wider when he heard her tell Harvey she was going to use the restroom, the Joker waited until she walked past him to smoothly rise to his feet. Pausing a good ten beats before making his pursuit, he checked from his left to his right before daringly entering the women's bathroom. Despite having dressed in drag before, he'd never actually entered a woman's restroom before, so he was naturally disappointed when he found that it was hardly any different than the men's.

_'So much for that magical tampon machine'_ he inwardly joked, straightening his tie as he looked around him.

All of a sudden, a toilet flushed and Rachel exited the stall in front of him with a stunned look on her face, the Joker leering as he took her exposed arms and pushed her back inside the stall. Locking it shut, he pinned her against the wall and placed a hand on either side of her head, a grin suffusing his lips as he purred, "Hello, there."

Catching her breath, Rachel desperately struggled in his arms. "You are _insane_....what are you doing!?"

"Well what does it _look_ like I'm doing? I'm saying hello!" the Joker condescendingly returned, his hands moving from her cheeks so they could stray down along her bare arms. He knew that in order to get Rachel to follow him, he needed to play the ever-amusing role of the seducer, but fortunately (and disturbingly) he found that with this particular bunny, it was rather easy. The Batman _and_ White Knight both wanted her, so that automatically made Rachel Dawes fascinating in the Joker's eyes. He wanted to know _why_ she was so "popular", but more importantly, he wanted to know why she'd been able to trigger memories of his past love.

To the Joker's relief, he discovered that Rachel didn't smell of jasmines as he lowered his lips to her neck, his teeth lightly nipping at her skin as he purred, "I saw you watching me, beautiful, so I _know_ you were thinking about our little "chat". What is it you want, hmm? This?"

Licking a hot trail up to her ear, the Joker pressed his body more snugly against Rachel's as he nibbled on the lobe, a soft little whine escaping his lips when his arousal began to tighten inside his pants. Moving so that his face was level with hers, he hovered his mouth over her lips before purring, "Here's what we're going to do, beautiful: I've got a room rented at the hotel just around the corner, so I want you to go there and come to room 1023. The door will be open, so just walk on in. When you do, we can uh...continue the little conversation we were having the other day." Licking her lips, he grinned at her before asking, "So can I expect to see you there?"

Rachel stood there, her heart racing as he moved his hands slowly down from her cheeks, running them over her smooth bare arms and sending a shiver of excitement through her veins. She stopped her struggling when he lowered his lips and nipped at the nape of her neck, his words burning her as he asked what she wanted. She knew what she wanted, but the problem was she didn't understand why. As his tongue traveled to her ear, she could feel his body pressing against her and she gasped, feeling his arousal pressing longingly against her thigh.

Bringing his face level with hers, the Joker's eyes now locked on her clear green ones as he explained what he wanted her to do. It was not an order, but more of a request, and her whole body shook from the waves of excitement he sent through. "B-but what about Harvey?" she asked, more to herself than to him as she shook her head. Finally making her decision, she softly whispered, "I'll be there…", her eyes closing as she wondered what on earth had come over her.

"Good girl" the Joker purred, tapping his hand against her cheek. Somehow he knew she wouldn't be able to say no -- some sort of morbid curiosity, no doubt -- but that still didn't mean that he wasn't surprised by her affirmation. Usually he had to do a little bit of cajoling with women -- he _was_ a frightening sight, after all -- so her acquiescence swelled his pride as his lips twisted into a pleased little smirk.

Moving in as if to kiss her, the Joker paused before completing the task while whispering, "I'll be waiting", a triumphant chuckle escaping his lips as he turned and left Rachel to her thoughts.

Re-adjusting his blazer, he limped slightly due to his erection as he made his way back through the smoke-filled bar. Fortunately for him, nobody had noticed -- or had chosen not to care -- that he'd just egressed the women's bathroom, a jaunty tune escaping his lips as he made his way toward the exit.

_'Poor, poor washed-up Harvey'_ the Joker thought, pleased with himself as he egressed the building into the cool night air. _'He must really be letting Rachel down in the bedroom if she's willing to be alone with a freak like me."_

Giggling at the thought, the Joker continued his trek until he was back at the Sundance Hotel, his excitement only mounting as he made his way into the elevator and pressed the button to the 10th floor. Now that Rachel had fallen into his trap, all he had to do was find the proper moment to strike. He didn't want to kill her right away since that would be too boring, but he didn't want to wait all night, either. He needed to set it up so that she gradually trusted him more and more, so that when he finally _did_ do the deed, the look on her face would be all the more delicious. As the Joker unlocked the door to his room and pushed it open, he grinned to himself as he realized that all he needed to do now was wait.

Rachel, meanwhile, was still very much recovering from her encounter with the Joker. After she'd composed herself enough to walk to the sink, she turned on the faucet and splashed some cold water on her face as she stared at her reflection in the mirror.

After a few moments she made her way out of the restroom and back to the table where Harvey gave her a concerned look. Grabbing her purse and coat, she anxiously explained, "Harvey, I'm not feeling well…it must have been something I ate, so I'm going to catch a cab and go home so I can get some rest." She waited for him to protest…to insist on taking her home himself (which he did), and she shook her head. "No, Harvey, all these guests are here for you…I'll be fine, don't worry." She kissed his cheek and made her apologies to the others before making her way out the door and into the night.

Looking around to make sure no one was watching her, she started down the sidewalk toward the Sundance Hotel, pulling her coat tighter around her slim frame. _'What are you doing, Rachel? He is a wanted criminal!'_ her inner voice whispered as she made her way into the hotel lobby, pressing the elevator button impatiently as a few strange characters looked her over. Jumping when the doors slid open, she then stepped inside and pressed the button for the tenth floor. Leaning against the wall as the elevator slowly climbed upwards, her heart raced when it finally stopped, and she stepped out before making her way down the hall to the door marked "1023". With a deep breath, she turned the handle and stepped inside the dark room while shutting the door behind her.

Even though the Joker had been expecting Rachel's arrival, he still couldn't help but be surprised when he saw her there in the flesh. She almost appeared as surprised as he was, but perhaps it was just because he was watching TV. Not a very "scary" thing for a wanted man to be doing, after all, and on top of that, he'd discarded his patterned socks and shoes onto the floor.

Grinning, he flicked the TV off and sprang up on the bed into a sitting position, his eyes lazily observing her from head to toe as he greeted, "So glad you could make it, honey bunch -- feel like taking a load off?" Patting the spot alongside him on the bed, he leered at her hesitation before deciding to rise from his perch. Making his way toward her, he abruptly slid her coat off of her slight frame, all the while repressing a giggle as he noticed her tense up. "Well what's wrong, gum drop? Not expecting a clown to have _manners?"_ the Joker gibed, grinning as he fought against the urge to bite down on her ear.

Turning her head to gaze into his eyes, Rachel slowly shook her head. "No...I think you have a lot of attributes that you want me to believe you don't possess." Now walking toward the window, she moved the curtain aside and looked out over the Gotham skyline. "You act as if you're shocked that I showed up."

Smirking when he watched Rachel part the curtains, the Joker bounced back onto the bed like a child while asking, "Whatcha lookin' for, hmm? The hitmen that I hired to take you out? They're straight across, in the United Gotham Bank." Giggling when he heard her gasp, he mocked, "Now are you _really_ that gullible, beautiful? I'd like to think that I'm _far_ more clever than _snipers."_

When Rachel turned back to regard him over her shoulder, the Joker shrugged and glanced down into his lap. It was true that he hadn't expected her to come, but not for the reasons that she was undoubtedly thinking. He didn't honestly believe that a sweet, fragile-looking creature such as herself would dare to be caught in a room with a monster like him, so he inwardly admitted that he was a little puzzled by this. Was it genuine curiosity, or was she like all those _other_ bleeding hearts who thought she could fix him? Snorting at the last notion, he grumbled out, "Well of _course_ I wasn't expecting you to come -- most "nice" Gothamite women don't meet criminals in their hotel rooms. What is it you're hoping to gain from being here, hmm?"

His final words held a suggestive undertone, but he masked it with a smug smirk.

Rachel walked over and sat next to him at the foot of the cheap hotel bed, and when he made a comment about how most "nice" woman don't meeting criminals in hotel rooms, she immediately blushed. It was true, no one would think that sweet, innocent Rachel Dawes would be in the hotel room of a wanted madman. Looking up at him, she stared as the Joker's lips spread into a smirk as he asked what she hoped to gain from coming, and she shook her head, pulling the clip from her silky hair and letting it cascade across her shoulders. "That's the million dollar question, my dear Joker....what should I expect, and what will I learn?"

The Joker watched Rachel unfasten her hair and his chest tightened, his tongue reflexively licking his lips as her brown locks fell across her shoulders. She was painfully beautiful, and that yet again made the Joker wonder why she was there; he never quite understood when people who were the exact opposite of him were willing to listen. In truth, he'd thought about her a lot ever since their fiasco at his hideout, but he'd been so sure that her memory of the incident was nothing short of repugnance. If that were true, why was she even willing to be in the same room with him?

As Rachel crossed her long, slender legs, the Joker suddenly grinned as a thought came to mind. What if he could get this charmingly innocent creature to care for him? Murder was one thing, but to actually get her to _like_ him was a challenge, and one that would burn the Bat almost as much as putting her six feet under. Looking up and realizing that she was returning his gaze, the Joker decided to at least _try_ his new plan -- he could always kill her later on if it didn't work out -- his gaze lingering on her parted lips as he moved in slightly closer. "Are you afraid of me?" he asked, his fingers lightly brushing against her knee cap. When she flinched, he smirked and did it again, his eyes now darting up to meet with hers as he asked, "Are you here because of what happened the other night? Do you, uh..._want_ to know why it happened?"

Rachel's breathing and heart rate increased as he leaned closer to her, his lips mere centimeters from hers as he asked if she was afraid of him, his fingertips brushing the bare skin of her knee cap and causing goose bumps to rise to the surface. Her leg flinched from the sensation, and he smirked, repeating his actions as his eyes darted up to meet with hers yet again. Closing her eyes for a moment and enjoying the sensation of his touch, Rachel nodded her head. She did not need to know, she _had_ to know....what was drawing her to him like this? Why did he make her tremble under his touch?

"Y-yes, I need to know why you make me tremble when you touch me? Why you make my heart race in my chest? Explain it to me" she whispered almost breathlessly as she opened her eyes, gazing deeply into his once more.

The Joker was considerably taken aback by Rachel's words, but he tried his damndest not to show his surprise as he gnawed on his lower lip. He thought that she'd only been trembling because she was _repulsed_ by him, not that he was actually affecting her emotions. The idea that anyone could look at him without cringing caused his chest to tighten, his gaze growing almost pained as he recalled all the times he'd had women in the past. They weren't truly _his_ since they'd been prostitutes -- not many women are attracted to psychopathic freaks, after all -- but each of them had demanded that he either take them from behind, or wear a mask so that they didn't have to see the godawful scars. How could Rachel Dawes, some incredibly misguided assistant DA, not be afraid of him like all the others? What made her so different? Was _this_ what attracted Batman and Dent?

Now feeling unsure of himself, the Joker wasn't so sure that he could continue his seduction act now that he knew she _did_ want him, and possibly not for a lustful roll in the hay like he was used to. If that were the case, it just wouldn't _do._ Grazing his knuckles against her cheek, he studied her with curious eyes as she seemed to melt into his touch, his lips now tracing along the corner of her mouth as he felt her breath on his face.

To see if she was merely toying with him, the Joker took her hand and forced her to touch his left scar, the peculiar sensation in his chest only growing when she didn't pull away like he thought she would. Leaning further into her palm, the Joker gave an appreciative murmur at the contact and closed his eyes, relishing in her touch since it'd been years since a woman had willingly let him come close. And yet, this _wasn't_ how it was supposed to happen...he wasn't gentle. He didn't _like_ gentle, but here he was, indulging in some attorney's school girl fantasy about repairing a broken man's heart. Inwardly scoffing at the idea, the clown prince suddenly grew weary of the light caresses and pulled Rachel roughly toward him, her right knee sliding across his lap as he forced her to sit on his thigh. Crashing his mouth against hers, he stormed his tongue past her lips and clutched at her desperately, his nails digging into the bare skin of her back as he began to frantically jerk his hips against hers. Moremoremore_more,_ he needed _more,_ and judging by his sudden loss of control, he was afraid that what Rachel could give him would never be enough. After years of not holding a woman, he felt himself burning up inside for want of contact.

When Rachel felt his mouth crashing down on hers, she welcomed the kiss with a warm and passionate response, her tongue rolling across his as she nibbled on his lips, wanting more as he clutched at her. His nails dug into the soft flesh of her bare back, causing her to moan and arch her body against him. God, it was _never_ like this with Bruce or Harvey… This was different, and brought out the animalistic side of her as her hand ran through his hair, tugging urgently as their bodies fell backwards onto the bed.

Surprised by Rachel's enthusiasm, but most certainly not adverse to it, the Joker hurriedly rolled her over beneath him so that he could be the one in control. Biting down on the sensitive skin of her neck, he growled against her heated flesh and licked at the afflicted area, animalistic grunts escaping his lips as he began to roughly dry-hump her through the sheer, stretchy fabric of her slinky black dress. His groans becoming more desperate, he lifted Rachel's legs to rest around his hips before hammering more urgently against her heat, his mouth falling down upon hers as he licked, bit, and groped at the woman lying beneath him.

Slipping a hand in between their bodies, the Joker dipped his hand past her panties and shuddered when he felt how deliciously _wet_ she was, his lips now hovering over hers as he asked her, "What is it you _want_ from me, hmm? Do you want _this?"_ Curling his fingers inside her, he began to probe for that special spot that would bring her to her knees, a triumphant smirk coming to his lips when he felt Rachel tremble and moan softly beneath him. "Or maybe you'd rather _this?"_ the Joker tried again, abruptly withdrawing his fingers before pulling her heat flush against his clothed arousal.

Despite the cool control on his face, the Joker was a raging mess on the inside. If it weren't for his proud dominance, he would be losing himself inside Rachel's warmth and begging her to scream his name...his _real_ name.

As he rolled her over so that she was now beneath him, Rachel's heart raced as if it would pound out of her chest as his teeth nibbled on the erogenous spot on her creamy flesh. His hips were grinding against hers at a feverish pace, and her skin felt on fire beneath his touch. When he lifted her legs and wrapped them around his waist, she laid her head back against the pillow and arched her back so she could press up against him, her moans becoming louder with each of his deliciously frantic thrusts.

As his hand snaked in between their bodies, Rachel felt him tug needily at her small silk panties, his breath against her neck as he moaned in her ear if this was what he truly wanted. She bit down on her lip as his fingers eagerly eased inside her, thus causing her to tremble and moan as she became even wetter when he explored her moist depths. Now withdrawing his fingers, the Joker pressed his fully erect bulge against her heat, her legs pulling him closer against her wanting, _needing_ him, her body on fire as she tilted her head back and gasped. "Uhmm, god yes...I _do_ want you" she moaned against his ear before sinking her teeth into his shoulder.

Her words seemed strange and foreign to the Joker, for he'd never heard the words "I want" or "I need" in a sentence pertaining to himself, let alone about something dealing with his body in a close proximity to someone else's. She _wanted_ him? ...Why? He most certainly wasn't a catch by any normal standards, so either she was as fucked-up as an Arkham inmate, or she was lonely and longing for a little bit of comfort like he was.

Deciding that he didn't care about her reasons, the Joker tugged at the top of her dress and exposed her satiny bra, his fingers looping through the garment before pushing it downward and revealing her breasts. Her nipples were hard and erect as he lowered his mouth to her soft mounds, his teeth latching onto one of the hard buds as he reveled in her clean scent and taste. Alternating in between sucks and licks, he lifted her dress well above her thighs so he could pull down her panties, a soft whine rumbling in his throat at the sight of her.

He hadn't seen a woman in desire of him in years, his erection straining against his pin-striped pants as he observed her heaving bosom, her full, parted lips, and her gradually spreading legs. Whimpering, the Joker lowered his mouth to her knee before gradually licking, biting, and sucking his way up toward the heat in between her thighs. Eagerly parting her legs, he gave a shuddery breath before giving her entrance a long, deliberate lick, a jolt shooting toward his groin when he heard her soft moans. Digging his nails into her thighs to steady her hips, he began to alternate in between slow, delicate licks and a tremendous thrashing of his tongue. Sucking on her clit, he made a pleased noise at her taste, his tongue slipping past her folds so he could better pleasure her. When Rachel's back arched, the Joker closed his eyes and immersed himself in the warm, heady scent of her body, his limbs trembling as he fought to keep himself from tearing at his pants and fucking her into submission. He didn't want to break his new toy...not _yet,_ anyway.

Rachel had been so _alone_ for so long, and she'd missed the touch of a man and the wonderful sensations that it sent through her as she lay on the bed beneath him, opening her eyes to see him tugging down the top of her clingy black dress. Her chest heaved as her breathing became more rapid, and he looped his fingers through her bra before pushing it down to reveal her creamy, full breasts. When he lowered his mouth onto one of her fully erect nipples, she let out a deep gasp, clutching the edge of the bed sheets and tilting her head back against the pillow.

As he devoured her breast, she twisted beneath him, a deep ache rising up deep inside her loins. Feeling the Joker push her dress up and slide her panties slowly down her thighs, she shuddered with anticipation as he urgently tossed them aside. Biting down on her lip as her legs parted in surrender, the Joker's lips went to her knee, biting and licking up her thigh until he reached her soft mound, which now felt as if it were on fire. When he began to tease her with his tongue, she let out a loud moan and entwined her fingers in his hair as he licked and suckled her inner folds, her whole body shuddering as she felt her muscles contract and her sweet juices flow. Her back arched roughly while she found herself wanting more...no, _needing_ more.

Feeling Rachel contract around his tongue, the Joker made a pleased little noise when she came inside his mouth, his surprise over her fast orgasm causing a sense of pride to flutter within his breast as he looked up at her. With dark eyes, he slinked up her body before crushing his mouth against hers, his tongue delving into her mouth so she could taste her own juices. Groaning into the heated kiss, the clown prince writhed as he tried to shrug out of his button-down shirt, the desire to feel her in her entirety making him shaky and restless. Tossing the garment to the floor, the Joker brought Rachel's hands to his shoulders and groaned when her long, lacquered nails scoured down his back, his spine arching as he relished in the delicious sensation of his splitting flesh. With a lustful growl, he lifted her up into his lap and bit down on her neck, his voice low and raspy as he breathlessly urged, "Ride me."  
When Rachel obediently began to grind her hips against his, the Joker snarled and tossed his head back as he choked on a moan, his nails digging into her waist as he forced her loins to grind more heavily against his. Panting into the crook of her neck, he moaned again before beginning to jerk his hips in a fast, frantic upward motion, his lips meeting with Rachel's as he yearned to remove his arousal from his pants. The delicious sensation of Rachel riding him, however, prevented him from taking the initiative.

Lifting her up until she straddled his lap, he demanded her to ride him, and Rachel lustfully obeyed. Grinding her hips back and forth against him, the rough fabric of his pants rubbed against her soft flesh, her nails digging deeper as she felt his erection pressing against her outer folds through his pants. Her hips met his in a frantic manner and she slipped her hand in between them, undoing the button of his pants before slowly letting down the zipper. Her fingertips grazed across his now free erection, her lips brushing against his as she shuddered in delicious anticipation.  
Biting back a gasp, the Joker clenched his jaw when he felt Rachel's feather-light touch on his arousal, his hips urgently tilting upward to meet with her stroking as he bit down on her ear. Snarling when he felt her rub her slick folds against his tip, he shuddered and eased himself forward so that only a small portion of his arousal was submerged. Biting back gasp after gasp, he fought to keep up his tease as he slowly withdrew and pushed forward again, each time allowing a little more of his length to enter her welcoming body.

Finally unable to take it, the Joker rose from the bed and shakily pushed his pants down to his ankle, his chest heaving from the adrenaline as he gazed down upon Rachel with longing. She didn't appear disgusted with the scars, burns, bruises, and scratches all across his body, and because of this he felt a tad more at ease with her scrutiny. He still felt vulnerable beneath her intense gaze, but he knew that she still wanted him, and he hated to admit it, but he wanted her too. Climbing back onto the bed, the Joker was about to tell her to get on her knees when he remembered that she didn't care about his scars, the realization that he didn't have to take a woman from behind leaving him with an odd sensation and slight confusion. How was he supposed to handle this woman? Would she expect something different than he was used to?

Rachel could feel him lift up as she brushed the soft folds against his tip, thus causing them both to shudder. Slowly he teased her, raising his hips and allowing the tip of his member to press against her moist folds, slowly easing himself in each time just a bit more as her lips stretched to welcome his girth. Her fingernails now dug into his bare chest as she bit down hard on her bottom lip, trying to control her urge to scream.  
Pushing her back onto the bed, she watched as the Joker stood up and removed his pants and she raised her arms, pulling her dress completely off before tossing it to the floor. The moonlight peeked in from the curtains and cast a glow on her naked form as she lay there, looking up at him while her whole body throbbed and ached for him. She wanted ...no, she _needed_ him inside her, to fill her and make her feel like she had not felt in a very long time. Lying on her back, her feet flat and her knees opened slightly, she gave him a sly smirk.  
The Joker felt a flutter in his lower belly when he gazed upon her, his desire now almost painful as he hesitantly parted her legs and placed them around his hips. Feeling her ankles lock in place, he eagerly leaned over her and licked the soft curve of her neck, his teeth biting down into her flesh as he pinched and squeezed her breasts. Properly aligning himself with her entrance, he released a guttural moan as he abruptly slammed inside her, his body shuddering as he suddenly found himself surrounded by hot, wet, and tight. Gone was the hesitation, and in its place was the animalistic hunger that had been plaguing him ever since she'd entered his room.

Placing his palms flat against the bed to steady himself, he began to brutally ram his throbbing arousal in between her slick walls, his eyes fiery and animalistic as he began to grunt and gasp. Ignoring the hair that fell in his line of vision, he licked and nibbled at her mouth as he hammered his hips into hers, their bodies rising and falling as they desperately clutched and grasped at one another.

"Shit..." Gritting his teeth, the Joker moaned against Rachel's throat as he frantically jerked his hips, her nails leaving burning, deliciously painful scratches that had him arching for more contact.

As he crawled onto the bed and positioned himself above her, he wrapped Rachel's legs around the Joker's waist and she dug her heels into his back, feeling him lick and nibble the curve of her neck, she moaned with anticipation, and when he suddenly slammed his length inside her, she bit down on his neck and tasted small droplets of blood. "Ooh _fuck!"_ she screamed, her walls tightening and spasming around his large member as her nails dug deeper into the flesh of his back, her hips desperately slamming up to meet with his.

She was now lost in the exquisite ecstasy that racked her body as he continued to slam himself inside her, and she met his every thrust with an animalistic enthusiasm as their bodies rose and fell in perfect harmony. Their lips met with a fiery passion as they sucked, nibbled, and groped at one another, their two bodies entangled in a mass of quivering animal sex.

Curling his toes, the Joker growled deep in his chest when he felt Rachel spasm around his length, his teeth gritting as his thrusts began to grow more urgent and erratic. He never would've thought that sweet, innocent Rachel Dawes would've been capable of giving him such raw, animalistic lust, let alone her having such a dirty mouth on her. Smothering a giggle against her neck, he quivered when he felt Rachel tighten her legs around his waist, his hips rotating slightly so he could massage all of her inner nerve endings.

Sucking on Rachel's tongue, the Joker tilted her hips so that he could penetrate her more deeply, a long, drawn-out hiss escaping his lips when he felt her fleshy walls parting to accommodate him. Desperate to get them both off, he reached in between their bodies and began to flick his thumb across Rachel's clit, his mouth sucking her earlobe in between his teeth as he felt her writhe beneath him. "C'mon, c'mon" he growled, "ride my cock", his hand working more furiously between her legs as he panted against her lips.

Rachel had lost all her inhibitions as she continued to thrust up against him in long, hard jerks as he drove himself deeper inside her. As her walls stretched even more to welcome him, her legs were now clamped firmly around his waist as he rotated his hips to reach all her sensitive spots, thus causing her to moan louder. She had lost control, and the sweet, innocent Rachel was gone.

She could feel her muscles reacting to the pleasure as her orgasm built, and when he used a free hand to massage her clit, she wiggled her hips in circular motions, grinding and thrusting until she finally felt an explosion begin deep inside her. "Oh god, I'm cumming... _Harder..._ Please, just _fuck_ me!" she screamed, tightly gripping the headboard as her fingers turned white from the effort.

More than willing to comply, the Joker withdrew so that only his tip was left submerged, only to suddenly ram back inside her with brutal strength. Groaning as he did it again, each of his violent thrusts caused Rachel's body to jolt against the mattress, her breasts bouncing from the force of his administrations as he did it again, and again. Now quickening the pace of his hips, the Joker gave a grunt with each of his movements, his eyes wild and dark as he frantically pounded into her body. Feeling her warm, slick walls gripping him tightly, he gritted his teeth when her body began to milk him, a guttural snarl escaping his lips as he came in a burst of liquid fire. Desperately jerking his hips, he continued to ride her until he'd drained himself dry, a groan rumbling in his chest as he collapsed on top of Rachel in a heap of satisfaction. Panting heavily, he murmured against her neck before lightly licking and sucking at her pulse. It was then, however, that a sudden realization had dawned on him: he'd actually just fucked Miss Rachel-Innocent- Prissy-Knickers-Dawes. In normal case scenarios he would've laughed, but not this time...this time he was far too bewildered by his raging hormones and draining orgasm to even think straight.

Both of their bodies were now covered in sweat, and Rachel's hair clung in wet loose curls to her face and neck as the Joker licked and suckled at her skin, sending chills across her fevered body.

Laying there in his arms, her muscles relaxed as she loosened the grip from his waist and let her legs fall beside his, her hands stroking his hair as she laid there amazed at what had just occurred.

Lazily closing his eyes, the Joker mumbled something unintelligible as Rachel stroked his hair, a pleased little noise escaping his throat as he leaned further into the contact. He wasn't used to being stroked and held, especially after something so intimate that he usually had to pay for. Any moment he was waiting for Rachel to shriek and push him away, but when that didn't happen, the Joker began to panic. He didn't _like_ feeling as if he needed a woman's touch, and he _damn_ well wasn't going to need this one's. Abruptly rising from Rachel's arms on unsteady limbs, the Joker grumbled to himself as he turned and sat on the edge of the bed. His shame and self-loathing caused him to keep his gaze trained out the window, a deep scowl settling across his lips as he managed to joke, "Enjoyed yourself, did we? I buh-lieve we may be getting a complaint from our neighbors at some point, because we gave them a loud Symphony in E Flat."

To Rachel, it was almost surreal that she was there with the Joker, and that she, the Assistant DA who'd vowed to fight crime, had just had animalistic sex with Gotham's most wanted. Suddenly she felt him pull away from her, and he sat on the edge of the bed facing away from her and toward the window. She heard him joke about all the noise they had made and she sat up, scooting closer to him as her fingertips traced the marks on his back from her fingernails. Feeling him flinch, she sighed and laid back down against the cool sheets, staring up at the ceiling. "Why are you avoiding me? Do I repulse you somehow?"

"How am I avoiding you? I'm still here in the same room with you, aren't I? I thought that in order to a-_void_ someone, you had to never see them" the Joker muttered, his eyes narrowing as he absently scratched his cheek. Finally turning to give her a cold look over his shoulder, he added, "Now I know that you women like to _cuddle_ after sex, but _I_ do _not,_ so if you're waiting for me to fall back in your arms and pro-fess my undying love, don't hold your breath."

Rising from the bed with a deep-set scowl, the Joker almost had the urge to laugh at his lie. He didn't like cuddling because he'd never done it. It was rather easy to despise something you'd never partaken in.

Rachel rolled over, propping herself up on her elbow when he said that he was not avoiding her. "Sorry" she softly apologized. "I didn't mean it that way, and I know not to expect anything from you."

She watched as he stood up from the bed and she rolled over onto her stomach, running her hands through her long, silky hair as the silence between them grew thick enough to slice with a knife.

Sparing a glance in her direction, the Joker groaned slightly before picking up Rachel's dress and tossing it in her face. "Put your clothes back on" he urged. "It's, uh..._distracting."_

Turning his back to her, he reached for his own discarded garments before slipping into his pants, soon deciding that he wouldn't even bother with his shirt since he'd be sleeping soon anyway. Or rather, he'd _try_ to sleep. After years of insomnia, he truly didn't even know why he bothered.

When he was certain that Rachel was fully-clothed, the Joker turned back around and regarded her in disdain. A part of him wanted to kiss her again, but the other part -- the _stronger_ part -- wanted to strangle her until she screamed for mercy. He didn't _like_ the fact that she was compromising his plan, and furthermore, he was trying to figure out what to do to keep the plan going. Did it mean he had to be _nice_ to her? Curling his lip in disgust, he scratched the back of his neck before feebly joking, "Well, that was the best conversation I've _ever_ had...I actually _did_ ask you over here to talk, but I suppose that's out of the question now."

Rachel caught his eyes when he turned around to look at her, picking up her dress he tossed it at her and asked her to put it back on. Standing up from the bed, Rachel slid the silky dress over her head and tugged it down past her hips before sitting back down on the bed.

Watching as he pulled on his pants, she sat up a little straighter while asking, "Well what did you want to talk about?"

Pursing his lips, the Joker frowned since he hadn't anticipated on Rachel actually _wanting_ to talk. _'She's a woman, you idiot'_ he irritably thought. _'Of course she'd want to talk!'_

Anxiously scratching his chin, he shrugged before muttering, "Doesn't really matter anymore, now does it? I basically wanted to give you the chance to ask any questions about the big, mean, scaaaaary man before you, but now I think you know a little too much." Frowning, he finally looked up from his lap and faltered. With her hair tousled and her head cocked to the side, Rachel resembled a dark angel and it made him restless. Celeste had been a pure angel, but this stupid Assistant DA was the complete opposite, and it made him furious that he was even comparing the two. With increasing agitation, he lowered his gaze back toward his lap and scowled.  
Standing up, Rachel walked over until she was standing in front of the Joker. He stared at her speechlessly for a moment before lowering his eyes back to his lap. Grabbing her coat, shoes, and bag, she begrudgingly shook her head. Her knees still weak from the rough sex as she quietly muttered, "Perhaps I did…" Slowly walking to the door, she opened it and slid out into the hallway. Leaning against the wall for a moment and closing her eyes, she then started down the hallway and to the elevator before slipping inside.

The Joker sat there completely speechless as she left, his eyes never once lifting from the floor as he heard the door gently close. Releasing a deep exhale, he finally glanced up toward the rumpled sheets and began to tremble with rage. He'd let her _touch_ him, and for what cost? Was this really going to help bring about Batman's downfall?

Rising from his chair on unsturdy legs, the Joker snarled before picking up his chair and smashing it against the wall again and again, never faltering until it broke into several splinters at his feet. Dropping the remaining pieces, he bowed his head forward and tore at his hair, the familiar feeling of self-loathing entering his soul as he fell to his knees.


	15. Pleasant Dreams

**A/N:** Whew, we FINALLY finished part 4! Sorry for the wait, guys! You've probably forgotten what happened, but…that's ok, I guess. Basically all that happened last chapter is they had sex. SHOCKER! lol Anywhos, we wanted to give J a more "human" side this time around, so if he seems slightly OOC, that might be why. Hopefully that's not too distracting! Anywhos, I'll just shut up now. Enjoy! ;)

CO-WRITTEN WITH CAGURLNIKKI"

"Pleasant Dreams"

It had now been at least a month since that fateful night at the hotel, but the Joker was no longer affected by Rachel's scent or beauty. In fact, he planned on blotting her from the Gotham scene once and for all, and that was why, with a dark grin on his face, he continued his trek through the hallway on the 50th floor of the DA's office. He'd stolen a keycard from an employee -- whom he'd had to dispose of -- and now twirled it in between his fingers, a jaunty tune whistling past his scarred lips as he searched for Rachel's office.

When he finally found it, the Joker stepped on in and flicked out his blade in preparation for the kill. But then he stopped...and stared. Leaning over her desk searching for God only knows what, Rachel Dawes continued to hum as her hips swayed back and forth, her skirt riding up to an indecent degree as the Joker's eyes trailed up her long, stocking-covered legs. Swallowing, he repeatedly ran his tongue across his lips as he tried to regain his train of thought -- hell, to remember why he was even _there_ -- a giggle threatening to escape his lips as he decided that maybe he'd prolong killing her just a little while longer.

Opting to toy with her, the Joker eagerly approached Rachel before leaning in close to her hunched form, his lips at her ear as he purred, "Hello, there."

Rachel had made her way home that fateful evening and ignored numerous phone calls from Harvey, opting to lock herself away for days as her mind replayed the events over and over. After receiving no further contact from the Joker, she finally returned to work at the office, hoping that submerging herself in her workload would help her force whatever it was about him out of her mind.

It was late and Harvey had a meeting with some of his contingents, and he had asked Rachel to join him, and even though she had desperately wanted to deny his request, she'd reluctantly agreed and told him she would meet him after she finished the case she was working on. Leaning over her desk searching for a file, she didn't hear the door open until the Joker's voice was warm against her ear, her body jolting as her hips bumped into the desk as she struggled backwards, her eyes wide with shock. "Wh-what are you doing here?" she feebly demanded. His mere presence caused her heart to start racing as she clutched the desk for support.

"Nice to see you, too" the Joker returned, sneering as she backed away from him. Promptly leaning in closer, he mockingly cooed, "Miss meeee? I thought it had been _far_ too long since our last little chat, so I was out in the neighborhood, and tah-daaaaah! Here I am, visiting my old pal, Rachel Dawes! Nice outfit, by the way...I don't re-member lawyers being so naughty." Leering as her eyes darted off to the side, the Joker stepped forward and took her by the chin, his glove-less hand forcing her to look at him as he ran a thumb across her lower lip. Her bewildered features and shallow breath was intoxicating -- _all_ victims' reactions were -- but this time he felt like ravishing the prey instead of killing it. Allowing his hand to drift down her cheek, he smirked as he asked, "So what've you been doing without me, hmm? Been using some _toys_ since Harvey can't satisfy the ache?"

Giggling at his dirty joke, the clown prince placed a hand on either side of her hips before purring, "If it helps any, I get off while thinking of you, too." Biting at her ear, the Joker wondered what the hell he was doing as he felt her melt in his arms. He knew he wanted to use her to get to Batman, but he could sense that things were starting to get out of hand just like last month.

As he commented on how long it had been since their last meeting, Rachel stared at him in bewilderment, her whole body trembling when he took her chin in his ungloved hand and ran his thumb across her lip. It, too began to quiver as the ache deep inside began. He smirked and asked how she had been without him since he knew Harvey couldn't feel the need that she had...the hunger that only the Joker seemed capable of fulfilling.

His hands wandered down to her hips, and she bit her bottom lip as his teeth nibbled on her ear, sending a low moan from her lips as her eyes closed in utter rapture. Why did he keep toying with her like this? What did he _really_ want?

"Speechless, are we?" the Joker purred, smirking as he rubbed his cheek against hers. "Well that's alright, I'll do all the talking...or lack there of, considering how you seem to want something else. I don't buh-lieve it's in your job description to have hot, rough office sex, now _is_ it?" Brushing his lips against the crook of her neck, he suppressed a giggle as he added, "You never answered my question, sweet cheeks -- have you _missed_ me? When you're forced to masturbate -- and I _know_ you do since you're dating Mr. Harvey-Impotent-Dent -- am _I_ the one you think of?"

Bringing his dark eyes up to meet with hers, the Joker leered before leaning in and licking her lips. Even though he didn't plan on sleeping with her again, the emotions warring across her delicate features were _quite_ amusing.

Rachel listened as he teased her lack of response, and when his lips met the soft curve of her neck, her chest heaved until he pulled away and asked the question again. "Well what do you want me to say?" she coolly demanded. "That I touch myself every night? Because yes, I do...there, are you happy now? For some reason you set something on fire deep inside me, and only you can extinguish it…" Pushing away from him, Rachel walked across the room and wrung her hands together before turning to face him again. "So is that why you came here? To watch me tremble at your touch and to tease me? I've tried to erase you from my mind, but it doesn't work…" Her heart beating faster now, Rachel stood there with her hands folded almost protectively across her chest.

The smug grin that had once adorned his lips immediately vanished, the Joker trying his damndest not to appear as stunned as he felt. He'd naturally only wanted to tease her, to feel a sense of _power_ over her, but now that she'd confessed something so personal, he immediately felt uncomfortable. "I, uh..." Faltering, the Joker scowled and scratched at the back of his head. Watching her movements carefully, he lowered his voice as he softly returned "Yes, that's obviously what I wanted to hear...if a man says he gets off while thinking of a woman, he damn well wants to hear that she's doing the same thing. Who needs porn mags when I've got _your_ love-uh-ly face constantly playing on GCN, or showing up in the tabloids? I never re-a-lized what a popular woman you were until I started looking for you."

Smirking, the Joker found that he enjoyed the delicate blush that stained her cheeks, a warmth filling him once he realized that _he_ was the cause of that reaction. He'd never made a woman react so strongly -- not even Celeste -- and he began to wonder what the hell Rachel actually thought of him.

When he flatly stated that that was indeed what he wanted to hear, Rachel felt her cheeks flush a bright red. She could not explain it, but she felt as though she was at the point where she needed a shrink, but there was something about him that was so different... He made her _feel_ different, and not like the usual perfect, prissy Assistant DA that everyone expected her to be.

Smiling a bit now, Rachel folded her hands before her as she acknowledged, "Okay, well now you know…The truth is out, so now you can tease me on how horrid it must be for me to have to deal with Harvey when all I can think of is you." Walking toward the clown prince, she leaned up against him with her lips brushing against his ear as she purred, "Why do you effect me like this?" Taking his hand in hers, she placed it in between her legs and moved it toward her moist spot.

The Joker giggled. "Well no, I actually _wasn't_ going to tease you, but now that you mention it, I suppose I should be asking what a pretty little vixen like you is with a drag queen like _that._ I'll bet he couldn't get a woman off who hasn't had sex in years!"

Surprised when Rachel was suddenly the aggressor, the Joker felt his breath hitch when she whispered her next words in his ear, his mouth growing dry when she took his hand and forced it between her legs. _Christ..._

Unable to respond, the Joker stared dumbly back at her as his cock began to stir in his pants, his body trembling feverishly as he began to diligently rub at the moistness in her panties. He wanted to denounce her, to call her a dirty, filthy _bitch,_ but instead he groaned and crushed his lips to hers, his free hand seizing a fistful of her hair as he began to back her up toward her desk. Slamming her down against the flat surface, he brought his lips to hers again and again before dotting several warm, burning kisses from her cheek to her neck. Oh, _fuck,_ he needed this so badly... Why hadn't he realized that this was a stupid decision? Night after night, he'd gone to bed with a hand curled between his legs because of this woman -- this stupid, _infuriating_ woman, and he'd somehow thought it had been a good idea to come see her?

Rachel could see the look of shock on his face when she placed her hand between her legs, because she was behaving in the complete opposite way that everyone knew her to be. The Joker made her this "naughty, dirty" girl who could not keep her hands off him when he was in the room. His fingers swirled around inside her panties, feeling her moisture continue to grow she smirked as he grabbed a fistful of her hair and crashed his mouth against hers. When he backed her up toward her desk, Rachel shoved the contents of her papers to the floor as she laid her body down on the cool, smooth surface. His fevered kisses trailed from her lips to her neck as she brought her arms around his back, her hands sliding down and clutching his ass as she kissed his ear and whispered, _"God,_ I missed this..."

The Joker shuddered in response, his eyes closing as he felt her lips slide teasingly from his ear to his neck. She was a goddamn _whore,_ but somehow that didn't matter to him, because it pleased him that she'd thought of their liaison as much as he had. He wanted to claim her in all of the manners he'd fantasized about, but he also wanted to destroy her for destroying him. He didn't _like_ not being able to think straight, let alone how she was able to distract him at the drop of a hat.

Trying to ignore the rapidly growing hardness in his pants, the Joker groaned as he tried to move away from her, but Rachel promptly pulled him back into her arms. "I can't" he rasped, hoping to regain a semblance of control. Pressing his forehead against her neck, he panted when he felt her hands beginning to unfasten his pants, his fingers weakly grasping at her wrists as he felt his resolve to stop her gradually ebbing away. "Stop it" he snarled, yet his tone held no bite. Subconsciously leaning further into Rachel's embrace, the Joker closed his eyes and brushed his lips against her neck, longing to hold her, yet at the same time wishing he could wipe her existence from the very earth.

Rachel continued to wiggle beneath him as he struggled, her feet hooking around the back of his calves as she bit and nibbled down his neck. She could hear him say that he couldn't as she reached for the button of his trousers, feeling his erection growing against her leg as he grabbed her wrists and tried to stop her.

Feeling a bit confused that his voice was telling her to stop, but his body was saying the complete opposite, his lips found the spot on her neck that drove her wild as he kissed and nibbled at the sensitive expanse of flesh. Her head tiled back as her long, silky hair fanned out across the desk, her eyes closing in complete rapture as she let him sweep her away.

Finally managing to break free of Rachel's embrace, the Joker staggered backwards and fell flat onto his rump, his wall-eyed stare almost comical as he gazed upon her while giving short, labored breaths. "I _can't"_ he stated more firmly, his bottom lip quivering as she sat up and gave him a quizzical look. Her blouse was slightly unbuttoned, and her skirt was hitched up to a highly indecent degree, a soft whine escaping his throat when he noticed the moist spot staining her silky panties. The heat in his loins only intensified as he swallowed longingly, his body hurriedly crab-walking backwards until he slammed into the wall behind him. Embarrassed by his ridiculous actions, he struggled to zip up his pin-striped pants, a discomforted hiss escaping his lips when his erection became painfully confined. Promptly turning around on his hands and his knees, the Joker bent over and pressed his forehead against the cool tile of the floor, his breaths continuing at a labored pace as he moaned pitifully over the ache in his pants. _Damn_ her! Why was she doing this? It wasn't how things were supposed to happen!

Rachel felt him break free from her and heard a loud thud as he staggered backwards onto the floor, her body sitting up slowly as she looked down at him in confusion. "A-are you okay? What's wrong?" Her voice faltered as she watched him turn over on his hands and knees, pressing his forehead flat against the floor. Was he _sick?_

Sliding off the desk, she walked over to him and placed her hand lightly against his back "Are you alright? Did I do something wrong?" As the last words left her mouth, he pulled away from her as if she had the plague or that she disgusted him in some odd, inexplicable way.

"Don't touch me" he snarled, keeping his eyes tightly closed. Her touch had been soft and sweet, and that only infuriated him all the more. Chancing a peek when a few moments had passed, he saw Rachel's slender legs and groaned as he quickly squeezed his eyes shut once more. "Go _away"_ he pleaded, placing a hand over his eyes as he curled up into a ball. When she kneeled down alongside him, he finally looked up at her with a bewildered expression across his face. "Why are you doing this?" he wearily demanded. "I didn't come here to fuck you, so I really just wish you'd stop this whole 'Madame Seductress' act. If you want to spread your legs for someone, go find Harvey."

Rachel felt as if she had been slapped across the face, her expression changing as she brought her hand back and slapped him hard across his cheek. "You know what? _Fuck you!_ Get the hell out of my office, you sleazy son of a bitch! You came here and asked if I'd thought about you, knowing _damn_ well that I had, and then when I tell you that I _have_ thought about you, you treat me like a whore with some disease! So yeah, maybe I _will_ fuck Harvey – at least _he_ knows how to treat a woman right!" Reaching for her purse and coat, Rachel ignored the tears that had begun to stream down her cheeks as she stormed past him.

The stinging slap considerably surprised the Joker, but it was just the sobering blow that he'd needed. He felt like a candy-assed pansy lying there on the floor, so while his injured pride was still intact, he furiously rose to his feet and glared as Rachel reached for her purse and coat. As she began to tearfully walk past him, he reached out and grabbed her by the elbow before promptly spinning her back around, his voice hard as he hissed, "I don't give a _damn_ about you and your feelings! I don't want your touch, I don't want your _sympathy,_ and most importantly, I don't. Want. _YOU!"_ With adrenaline swimming through his veins, the Joker felt like raking his fingers through the buttons of her top, bending her over, and taking her against her will on that filthy desk, but instead all he did was squeeze her cheeks in between his hands. His nails dug into the soft flesh almost painfully, his teeth biting into his lower lip as he fought not to ravage her mouth with his. Trembling, he whimpered like a trapped dog and finally bowed his head against the crook of her neck, his body shuddering as he wished Rachel wasn't so much like _her._ Why'd she have to remind him of the most painful moments of his life?

Hearing that he didn't give a damn about her or her feelings felt like another slap to her face, Rachel whimpering in pain from his actions as he lowered his head into the crook of her neck and shuddered. She could hear him whining as small droplets of blood mixed with her tears ran down her cheek to her neck, her chest heaving as she struggled to breathe through the haze of her adrenaline. She wanted to slap him again and to tell him that she hated _everything_ about him, but she couldn't...no matter _how_ hard she tried, she never could.

The Joker licked the blood and tears from her skin, his pain and pleasure warring with one another as he fought not to sink his teeth into her soft flesh. He felt a lump form in his throat as he wondered what in God's name was wrong with him, and more importantly, why the hell did his eyes feel so raw and scratchy? He'd never shed a tear in his life, not even as a child, so why did he feel like a simpering idiot while in this woman's arms? Clutching at her more desperately, he held her like a child seeking salvation and shuddered, his voice cracking slightly as a soft "Why?" escaped his lips. The question was obtuse and unclear, and even the Joker, himself didn't quite know what he was asking.

When Rachel began to grow restless in his arms, the Joker moved so that his forehead was pressed against hers, his eyes like fiery embers as he whispered, "You still smell like her."

His raw emotion of anger had now been replaced as he clung tighter to her, kissing away the blood and tears from her neck as Rachel wrapped her arms around him in a soothing, comforting manner. When he raised his head, her blue eyes met with his as she heard him whisper the she still smelt like _her..._ Who was he talking about? Had he actually loved someone in the past? Had he let a woman come close to him, just as she so desperately wanted to be? As Rachel gently caressed his cheek, she pressed her lips softly to his forehead, not wanting to ask the questions as she stood there staring into his eyes.

Bewildered by her affection, the Joker was tempted to recoil and push her away again, but when he felt the lump return to his throat, he miserably slumped against her in weary resignation. He was tired of fighting with his conscience over his past mistakes, and somehow he wanted to tell Rachel about Celeste and her tragic death, but the thought of having to utter the words was far too painful to even think about. Feeling Rachel's fingers stroke his cheek, he self-consciously moved his face toward the crook of her neck so she couldn't touch him there. He didn't _like_ being touched so gently, especially when it was so close to his scars.

Finally releasing Rachel in bewildered mortification, the Joker scowled and sunk down to his knees, his head bowing as he whispered, "I need the Batman... I need him to kill me." Not caring if his words were heard or not, the clown prince grinned bitterly since he knew that deep-down this was why he needed Rachel all along. With her death on his hands, he could easily get Batman to turn on him and, amidst his passionate revenge, accidentally kill him along the way. His death would be liberating and, the way the Joker saw it, he'd be avenging Celeste's death by bringing about his own.

All Rachel could do was hold him in her arm, and after what seemed like hours he slowly released her and slumped to his knees, bowing his head down and avoiding her eyes as she heard him whisper that he needed Batman to kill him. Shocked, she looked down at him as her fingers caressed the top of his head "W-why do you need Batman to kill you? Why do you want to die? Is it to forget _her?"_ she bravely asked, awaiting anxiously the fact that she may have overstepped her boundaries. "I don't want you to die...I care about you, whether you believe it or not."

The Joker began laughing uncontrollably; it wasn't out of mirth, but bitter apathy. "You do _not"_ he venomously spat, laughing once again. "You lawyers are _all_ the same -- you want to look good for the public and nothing more, so this sweet little act of yours can end right now. I don't _care_ if you care, 'cause there's nothing to care _about._ It's hard to de-velop sympathy for a man who doesn't exist, after all." Smirking at Rachel's bewilderment, he grinned before sitting more fully onto his rump. He didn't bother to smack her hand away from his hair, but his lips were twisted in obvious displeasure from her actions. Now looking up into Rachel's eyes, he coldly added, "No, it's not to forget _her,_ it's to a-_venge_ her. 'Cause y'see, _I'm_ the one who killed her. _Me!"_ Laughing again, he clutched at his sides and giggled until tears streamed down his cheeks, his laughter unable to cease as he fell back to the floor and began tearing at his hair.

When he began to laugh she stared at him in disbelief, her body hesitantly sitting beside him on the tile floor as he looking up at her with a cold stare. She promptly withdrew her hand from his head and let it hang limply by her side.

Still on her knees, Rachel leaned over and slapped the Joker again, but this time to break him from the hysteria he'd fallen into. "You can tell me whatever you wish but, you can_not_ tell me how I feel… I don't put my feelings out there for no one, and especially when it would cost me everything. Do you honestly think my friends and colleagues would be _ecstatic_ that I have feelings for you?"

Jolting when she slapped him, the Joker's facial muscles relaxed and left him with an eerily calm expression. The tears still streamed down his cheeks, but they were no longer flowing since his laughter had ceased, his eyes reflecting bewilderment as he regarded Rachel curiously. Nobody had ever said they'd had "feelings" for him, not even Celeste. She'd cared for him, sure, but it was almost as if she'd been too ashamed to admit it in case the townspeople found out. The fact that Celeste had never told him she loved him made him angry, but he didn't want to lose it in front of Rachel again. She probably _already_ thought he was a helpless crybaby, but the truth was, he was so close to popping since he'd been suppressing his rage and agony for 30 long, miserable years.

"Rachel" he solemnly began, refusing to address her last comment, "can I tell you about her?"  
He didn't know why he was asking -- hell, he didn't _want_ to talk about Celeste, but somehow his damned tongue had taken the initiative to start speaking, and once he uttered the fatal words, he knew it was all over.

Sitting there across from him on the floor, Rachel simply nodded her head. She felt that perhaps it was something that he needed to get off his chest, something that he had most undoubtedly been holding onto for way too many years. Her hands folded in her lap as she waited for him to begin, her demeanor like an anxious schoolgirl waiting to be told a fairytale. Unfortunately, she was pretty sure that this one didn't end with "happily ever after"…  
Since the Joker was uncomfortable looking Rachel in the eye, he pulled out his new weapon (a deck of razor-sharp playing cards), and began to methodically flip through them as if they were the most interesting things in the world. Clicking his tongue, he paused a moment more before softly beginning, "All my life nobody ever really looked at me like I was a person, 'cause I was just "that freak who got chopped to bits by his old man". I never really expected to meet someone who was interested in me for _me_ and not just to see if the rumors about my scars were true, but Celeste was different. She'd come over after school and offer to play catch with me. Baseball was my favorite sport, but I never played for the school team since I knew people were afraid of me. I was different...I liked dissecting animals with knives, and cutting myself, and blah blah blah, so at first I thought Celeste was making fun of me in some weird, underhanded way since she kept coming back. I mean, _why_ would she come back? It never made any sense to me, and quite frankly, I _still_ don't understand it since she never said she..." The Joker paused, exhaling deeply as he shrugged. "It doesn't matter, I guess, but I always wondered why she never said she loved me. I knew she did, 'cause before she'd leave, she'd always take my hand and trace the shape of a heart in my palm before telling me 'Just in case you forget, this will help you know I'm always here'." Clicking his tongue, the Joker began to flip through the deck of cards much faster now, his gaze darkening as he mumbled, "She began to come over more often, but my foster parents didn't think anything of it. If anything, they were _glad_ I had someone to talk to, because I'm pretty sure they were afraid of me, too.

"All I wanted to do was prove that I wasn't some sick, disease-ridden freak, but nobody seemed to care enough to try and get to know me. I didn't really care until Celeste came around, though, because I rather enjoyed being alone. It was liberating, somehow...it allowed me to dwell in my own thoughts." Bitterly shuffling the cards, the Joker mumbled, "One day I didn't hear Celeste approach me, but she saw that I'd gutted a rabbit and was playing with its innards. I never meant to scare her -- hell, I didn't think she'd be there at all, but Celeste just burst into tears and went tearing off as fast as she could. Since I was afraid she'd never speak to me again, I went racing after her. Where we lived there was this steep, steep hill that led down into a quarry, so I guess Celeste somehow thought that that was the safest option since all the kids were constantly warned not to go there. I saw her go in that direction anyway, so I managed to catch up. It had rained the night before, so the earth was exceptionally muddy when we started running up that hill. I kept begging with her to come back, that I was _sorry,_ but she just continued crying and wouldn't look at me. When Celeste was trapped at the top of the hill, she turned around and gave me this horrified look with her big, frightened blue eyes. Normally I _enjoy_ fear, but not from her...I _never_ wanted to see her look at me like that." Trembling, the Joker licked his lips while sustaining, "I tried to get her to come back to me again, but when Celeste finally told me no, I began walking toward her. Not realizing how close to the edge she was, she took a step back and began to stagger. She quickly regained her balance, but since the ground was so damp and muddy, the earth gave way and she plummeted down to her death before I could even think to save her."

Swallowing the lump in his throat, the Joker practically growled out, "I _killed_ her..._I_ killed the only person who cared for me, and now I'm trapped here in this hell until someone like Batman can free me."

When Rachel gasped, the Joker looked down and realized that amidst his fury, he'd completely shredded the skin of his palms with his razor cards. Emotionlessly watching the blood spill from his wounds, he dropped the cards and slumped back against the desk, his voice lacking all passion as he mumbled "Tah-daaah."

Rachel knew that Celeste obviously saw something inside him that no one else did, just like she did. She could tell that again that the Joker was punishing himself for a death that was not his fault...just like his baby sister, and he thought that everyone that he loved died and that it was somehow his fault. Looking down at his hands and wanting to take them in hers, she saw blood and mangled flesh where the playing cards had ripped through his palms. Gasping, she reached up and grabbed the scarf off of her coat before wrapping it around his hands "Good god, we have to stop the bleeding..." Holding pressure on his palms, she looked deep into his eyes while taking a deep breath. "You know" she hesitantly began, " you didn't kill Celeste, because it was an accident, just like you weren't responsible for the horrible things your father did. Sometimes you just can't save the world."

Numbly watching her staunch the blood, the Joker didn't bother lifting his gaze from his palms as he slumped further forward. "It may've been an accident, but if I wasn't such a goddamn _freak,_ she never would've been afraid of me, because I wouldn't have been killing animals or cutting myself if I was normal. And save the world?" The Joker scoffed bitterly. "Whoever said anything about saving the world? I don't care about anyone or anything, anymore...people should know what it feels like to have nothing to live for, so that's my job. To prove to them how pa-_thet_-ic their trivial matters really are, and that what they're striving for in life is pointless. _Everything's_ pointless." Now looking up at her, the Joker briefly thought of thanking her for her kindness, but instead he lowered his gaze and uneasily licked his lips. It was a habit he hated since he'd acquired it after his scars, but by now it was as natural as brushing one's teeth and couldn't be stopped.  
Reaching down, Rachel cupped his chin and lifted it up so he was forced to look at her. "I don't believe _everything_ in life is pointless…you've proven to me that you can be a good person."

"Why are you doing this?" the Joker cut in. "Don't you know what'll happen if someone finds out you've been, uh..."chatting" with a criminal? You'll lose your job, your friends, and blah blah blah, so I'm pretty sure that trying to make a hollow man whole again isn't worth it." He slowly reached up and took her hand, then gently removed it from his face as if he thought her fingers were made of glass. The thought of being touched still made him uncomfortable, but his hand lingered over hers before he quickly placed it back in his lap.

Taking in a deep breath, Rachel shook her head. "Of course I know what will happen to me, but I believe I am in charge of my own life. _Not_ Harvey Dent...not even Batman"

"Then why do it, hmm? Those sound like pret-ty big risks to me" the Joker insisted, quirking a brow as he tried his damndest to figure this woman out. She was strange in her kindness, because he'd never met anyone who was willing to risk _everything_ just for a stupid chat. Why did she care so much, anyway? It wasn't like his life of solitude was any of her business, especially since he was so accustomed to being alone and bottling up his problems. And yet...a part of him was grateful to Rachel for caring. He hadn't felt this way since Celeste, and owning up to the fact pained him deeply. He never wanted to replace her...

Clearing his throat, the Joker looked down at his blood-soaked hands before awkwardly mumbling "I'll, uh...I'll buy you a new scarf. You didn't have to waste it on me, you know. I've been hurt several times, after all, and I don't think I would've bled out."

When the Joker asked why she would do it, Rachel sat back against the desk and closed her eyes. Why _was_ she doing this? What was it that made her want to give up everything she had worked so hard for? She knew that if Bruce found out, he would be infuriated and she would probably lose the only man she had ever cared about...what was she hoping to find?

She opened her eyes when she heard him speak, stuttering something about buying her a new scarf and how she should not have wasted it on him. "It was _not_ a waste. You needed help, and you still do…those wounds need to be cleaned and dressed in sterile gauze."

The Joker couldn't help but smirk. "And where, pray tell, am I going to _find_ this magical gauze, hmm? Per-haps I'll just pull some out of my ass while I sit here bleeding to death." Giggling at his barb, his gaze softened as he leaned back against the desk, his eyes darting uncomfortably from Rachel to his hands, then back to her again before he finally swallowed his pride and mumbled "Thank you..."

The words had been uttered so softly that Rachel had to strain to hear, but the Joker refused to look up in case she gave him one of her warm smiles. She was _far_ too nice, and it bothered him... She shouldn't be so kind after all the hell he'd put her through. It just didn't make any _sense._

Rachel listened to him tease about where he would get the "magical gauze", but then he leaned back against the desk and she heard him whisper "thank you". In all honesty, she thought her mind was playing tricks on her, but then she realized, to her absolute pleasure, that it hadn't been a hallucination at all. Standing up slowly, she looked down at him with a warm smile. "You are very welcome...now if you come with me, I can take care of your wounds at my apartment because I'm sure a trip to Gotham Memorial is out of the question." She laughed, holding out a delicate hand for him.

The Joker looked at her hand distrustfully before taking it, wincing slightly from the pain as he hauled himself up off the floor. He was a little apprehensive since he wasn't comfortable with being alone with her, but he knew that she was the type who wouldn't relent until he'd agreed. Smirking slightly, he nodded before agreeing "Well yeah, I suppose so...they kinda banned me ever since I impersonated that nurse." Giggling at the memory, he followed Rachel out into the hallway before asking "Sooo, are you going to take me for a joyride in one of those fancy-schmancy lawyer cars? I typically drive a semi to "work", so this'll be in-ter-es-ting."

Stealing glances at her out of the corner of his eye, the Joker felt his palms begin to sweat as he worried about what would happen more than ever. She was far too comfortable in his presence, and that knowledge made _him_ uncomfortable. Once they'd reached her car, the clown prince gave an appreciative whistle before hopping into the passenger seat. "Nice ride, peaches! How long'd it take to pay _this_ thing off, a whole five years?" Watching as she got in alongside him, he tried to ignore her skirt hiking up her slender legs as he swallowed and quickly glanced out the window.

Rachel grinned. "Now I wouldn't call it that, but it's better than a semi, smartass." Smirking, she added, "Oh, and you may want to fasten your seatbelt…I actually believe in following the rules."

"Oooh, are you actually going to _break bad_ and go over the speed limit?" the Joker mocked, batting his lashes while he begrudgingly obeyed her suggestion. Feeling his wounds rip back open from the action, he snarled softly as he watched two scarlet blooms flare across his palms. Normally he would've laughed at his idiotic accident, but somehow he felt relieved since he knew he deserved it.

Suddenly having an idea, he grinned and rolled down his window before sticking his head out with a whoop of laughter, the wind whipping through his lank hair as he giggled and shook his head like a dog. Feeling Rachel trying to pull him back inside, he gave a protesting whine and smacked her hand away, ignoring the pain from his injuries. "No!" he argued, "I can see your apartment better this way...wind through the hair makes me look like one of those sexy, wind-blown models in the commercials." Giggling, he closed his eyes and allowed the wind to whip him in the face before he finally relented to Rachel's tugging and begrudgingly slipped back inside the car. As he turned to complain, he suddenly realized that they'd stopped, his eyes trailing up toward the apartment complex before remarking "Wow, nice digs...nice car, nice house, nice _body_ -- damn, what _don't_ you have?" Giggling at his jesting remark, he hopped out of the car before cracking his neck.

Rachel heard him make a remark about breaking bad and going over the speed limit as she pulled out of the garage, her car cruising at a relatively fast pace as she looked over to see him hanging out the passenger window. She reached over and snatched the back of his shirt, trying to make him get back in the car since she was afraid he'd draw the attention to himself. But he tugged away like a child, and she continued to yank on him until he finally relented.

Just as they turned into her complex, he slid back into the car and she pulled into her spot, turning the car off as she heard him make a remark about her having a nice car, nice place, and nice body. Shaking her head, she exited the car and started toward the building while waiting for him to follow.

"What, so now you're not talking to me? Or are you too _shy_ to accept compliments?" the Joker continued to tease, grinning as he skipped after her. He was in a much better mood since the incident in Rachel's office, and the prospect of her putting painful, stinging antiseptic on his hands made him high with excitement. He could easily be considered a bipolar man, what with his odd mood swings and all, but he cared little for this as he plodded after Rachel into the apartment complex.

"Nice" he remarked, looking about him with a wide grin. "And just think, no bellhop to tip! I feel as if I'm in a five star hotel, so I'm almost afraid to see what your actual place looks like." Glancing around him with wide eyes, he almost appeared childlike as he took in everything with an awed look upon his face. He was accustomed to sleeping on a dingy cot in an abandoned building in the Narrows, so anything remotely fancy always caught his immediate interest.

Once they'd gotten into the elevator, the Joker rushed forward and pressed all of the buttons, giggling uproariously at the look of annoyance on Rachel's face. At first he couldn't understand why she was so disgusted, but after stopping on every floor, he immediately knew why: Rachel's apartment was on the 15th floor, and after 14 pointless stops even he, himself was getting a little impatient. As soon as floor 15 arrived, the Joker cheerily zoomed ahead of her and bounced on the balls of his feet as he waited for her to follow. "C'mon, c'_mon,_ I'm starving!" he whined.

"Shhh, I have neighbors you know" she hissed, laughing as she opened the door and flicked on the light switch before stepping inside.

"I call the TV!" the Joker exclaimed, giggling as he pushed Rachel out of the way and went leaping onto her bed. Bouncing about on his rump like a child, he grinned while reaching for the remote and flicking it on. As he surfed the channels, his features dulled as he grumbled, "Boring...boring..._Harvey Dent??_ _**Veeery**_ boring...ah! A featurette about me, me _me!"_ Grinning broadly, he began to kick his legs back and forth as he watched on with a morbid fascination, his gaze now slyly travelling over toward Rachel as he noticed her bending over to pet what looked like a small cat. Either that, or it was a rat-like dog. "Y'know" he coyly spoke up, "it's not very _ladylike_ to just bend over when you've got company. Not that I mind the cute leopard print panties or anything, but I'm trying to watch my debut without any distractions. And what is that thing, a _rat?"_ As if seeming to understand him, the cat-rat-dog-thing hissed and went tearing toward the other end of the apartment.

Suddenly losing interest in the TV, the Joker flicked it off and bounded into the kitchen without Rachel's permission. Opening the fridge, he cheerily began rummaging around before asking "Sooo, what do you like on your sandwich? There's some meat and cheese in here, so I figured I'd make one of those and be _niiiiice_ and make you one, too. Oh! And I _promise_ it won't be poisoned."

Rachel stared at him as he pushed past her, yelling that he called the TV as he ran into her bedroom while she hung her coat on the rack. Walking over to the bedroom door, she looked at him with a sneer while asking, "Comfortable, I hope?" She laughed and heard her cat Simon, so she bent down to pet him as the Joker told her it was very 'unladylike' to bend over like that. Blushing, she stood up straight up blushing as she caught the tailwind of his last question. "No, silly, that's my cat Simon…are you scared of cats, or something?" As she made her way toward the bathroom to gather the supplies she needed, she heard him rummaging in the fridge while asking what she would like on her sandwich. "Just make me whatever you're having" she called out before gathering the supplies and making her way into the kitchen.

"Alright, a pickle and cheese sandwich it is!" Giggling at the look on her face, he assured her he was kidding as he began piling all sorts of meats and cheeses in between a bun. Smashing it down with his hand, he grunted when it began to fall apart. "Apparently they don't make bread like they used to -- back in the 90's, this stuff held all sorts of fillings!" he complained, shrugging as he made a less full version and brought them over to the table. Careful to keep his bloody palms away from the food, he took a rather barbaric bite of his sandwich before grinning up at her. "Yes, I'm _terrified_ of cats -- one ate my cousin Wilbur. Apparently humans taste like chicken, too."

Giggling, he watched her set out the supplies before purring "Oooh, Nurse Rachel's here to save the day, eh? What are you going to do, give me a shot and a lollipop?"

Scrunching up her face at the sound of a pickle and cheese sandwich, Rachel started to unload the supplies while watching his crude attempt at piling mounds of meat, cheese, and bread together before finally bringing the sandwiches to the table. Trying her best not to laugh (after all, he _had_ made an attempt at a nice gesture), she looked down at the messy sandwich and smiled weakly. "Umm, I think I'll eat it later...but thanks". When the Joker asked if she was going to 'save the day', Rachel smirked. "No, I'm sorry to say that I don't give out lollipops with my shots, so you'd better behave"  
"Aww, but be-having is so _boring"_ the Joker complained, stuffing the rest of his sandwich into his mouth before chewing noisily. Now drumming his fingers against the table top, he held out his hands before asking "Are you going to read my fortune? If you're going to say that I'm going to be seriously injured, I'd say I already knew that. I get an injury at least fifty times a day!"  
Watching as Rachel pulled out some antiseptic and cotton balls, he grinned with anticipation as he held his hands out with more eagerness than was necessary. He loved pain, but he doubted that she would understand that, and quite frankly he didn't give a damn.  
Slowly taking his hands, Rachel unwrapped the torn scarves and looked at the mangled flesh before taking out a bottle of antiseptic, then pouring it over the wounds while expecting him to at least flinch. Somehow he seemed to enjoy the pain. "Tell me if it hurts" she urged, smirking since she knew it wouldn't.

"It hurts, but it hurts so _gooood"_ the Joker purred, giggling as he curled his toes with a sigh. The stinging sensation from his flesh was intoxicating, and her delicate hands looked so small compared to his as she dabbed at the wounds. She was so delicate that he almost told her to be _rougher,_ but he decided that she'd learned enough of his secrets for one night. She didn't need to know that he was a masochist on top of everything _else_ he'd divulged.

Watching her features scrunch up in concentration, the Joker swiped his tongue across his lips and leaned slightly forward. Her skin looked soft underneath the dull glow of the kitchen light, and he was tempted to touch her face. He'd always wondered what perfect cheeks felt like, but he firmly decided against his desire and bit down on his tongue. "You're not going to stitch those up, are you?" he asked, quirking a brow at the thought. "'Cause there are so many that I don't think that would work, I just..." Pausing, he winced in surprise when a sudden pain tugged at his lower back. Glancing down over his shoulder, he cursed when he noticed a scarlet bloom beginning to spread across his shirt. "Shit, my stitches re-opened...do you think you could fix that, too?"

Rising and removing his shirt before Rachel could respond, he peeled the fabric from his body and groaned as he tossed the soiled garment to the floor. "So much for staying clean..."

Rachel noticed him staring at her face, and couldn't help but smirk. "Do I have something on my face?" Before she could even think to speak again, the Joker rose and removed his shirt and bared to her his poor stitch job. Horrified, she feebly announced, "W-well, I've got to warn you that I've never been a great seamstress…"

"And you think _I_ have?" the Joker demanded, giving her a pointed look as he gestured toward his stitch job. "Beautiful, it doesn't take a seamstress to stitch up a wound, so just try, alright? Who knows? You might actually have fun!"

Grinning, the clown prince plopped down in front of Rachel and got in between her legs before she could protest, now leaning forward so she could get a good view of the wound. He knew that she would undoubtedly see all of the hideous scars, burns, and various marks on his skin, but he no longer felt self-conscious of them. Snorting at her remark, he sarcastically returned "You _do_ have something on your face, yes: some eyes, a nose, and some lips. How extraordinary, eh?"

Sighing, Rachel reluctantly agreed, "Well I can try...can't be any worse than your job, after all." As she took a needle and thread and penetrated the skin, she slowly pulled it through the other side and became a bit squeamish. She heard him joke that she had something on her face (eyes, nose, and some lips), so she poked him in retaliation. "Ha, ha, _haaa,_ you are _sooo_ funny." Finishing the stitches, she then placed some cream on the wound as well as some gauze before taping it down. "There…I'm afraid that's the best I can do."

"I _am_ funny, aren't I?" the Joker agreed, grinning as he gave a sigh of contentment. "And it's in-ter-es-ting that I've managed to get in between your legs again so soon...I would've thought it'd take _months!"_ Giggling at his jesting remark, he flopped his head back so that it was resting in her lap, a broad grin stretching his lips as he looked up at her in amusement. "Wanna play strip poker? Or naked twister? Or 20 Questions? Or something _fuuuuun?"_

When he leaned his head back into her lap asking if she wanted to play a game, she thumped the tip of his nose. "Alright, how about 20 Questions? I stink at Poker…" She giggled, looking down at him as he leaned back between her legs like a lifelong friend or lover. Rachel was still confused as to why she allowed all of this to happen and why it felt so natural.

"Okaaaay, then I'll start!" the Joker decided, grinning as he suddenly leapt up to his feet and took Rachel by the hand. Eagerly pulling her into her bedroom, he cheerily explained "If we move the game in here, it'll be like a sleepover...we can paint our nails passion pink and talk about _boys!"_ Giggling over his jesting remark, he hopped onto the bed and immediately dove under the covers, only to peak out at Rachel before asking "Are you comiiiiing? And I don't mean 'cumming', 'cause you already did that with me a month ago."

Sneering at the blush on Rachel's cheeks, the Joker watched as she hesitantly slid in beside him before he threw the covers over their heads. "Okey-doke" he cheerily began, "who do you _loooooove?_ Batface? Ass-Chin Dent? Some _other_ freak? 'Cause no offense or anything, beautiful, but you seem to attract the weirdos."

Rachel felt breathless at the question, and considerably taken aback. "Oh, so I attract weirdos, do I? Does that mean _you're_ attracted to me then?" she teased, laughing as she folded her arms. "Besides, who says I 'love' _anyone?"_

The Joker sneered. "Ahhh, a wise-gal, eh? But yes, I'm _madly_ in love with you" he gibed, giggling at the shocked look on her face. "Kiddiiiing! But, uh...just answer the question, beautiful. You women _all_ seem to buh-lieve that love is what you've got in a re-lationship, so that's why I asked. But me? I'm re-a-list, because I know there's no way in hell that anyone will _ever_ love a guy like me. I'm too scary!" Sneering, he laid down and looked up at her, his eyes briefly concentrating on the soft curve of her lips before he glanced down at his feet and frowned.

Rachel scoffed. Bruce was married to Batman and Gotham City, and Harvey was married to his own career, so she knew that was just his "arm candy". There was no way that there was room for 'love' in either of those relationships, even if she cared for both men quite deeply. When the Joker stated that there was no way in hell anyone could love someone as scary as him, she shook her head and sighed. "You just don't get it, do you? You are _not_ scary…at least not to me, and as far as what I have in a relationship......well, that's a laugh, 'cause I have absolutely nothing."

"Hmm, well that's disappointing...I _want_ to be scary" the Joker muttered, his bottom lip protruding slightly before he looked up at her with a smirk. "And no re-lationship, eh? Well that's something we both have in common, then...how in-ter-es-ting. Why doesn't Miss Beau-tee-ful Rachel Dawes have a lover, hmmm? You're far too, uh..." He abruptly trailed off, frowning since he felt uncomfortable with giving any further compliments. Glancing up at her, he found that he wanted to nibble on the soft hollow of her neck, but in order to quickly distract himself, he grumbled "Your turn...ask away, peaches!"

Rachel smirked and laughed softly. "We have a lot more in common than you thought, and as far as lovers...well, our little tryst last month was the last time I had a 'lover'." She moved closer to him, wanting him to inhale her perfume and smell her freshly washed hair as it fanned across the pillow beside him. When the Joker said it was her turn, she smiled thoughtfully while agreeing, "Okay...I want to know what it is about me that reminds you of Celeste? And is it the reason that you're attracted to me? And don't bother denying it, because I can see it in your eyes every time you look at me." She knew that bringing up Celeste would probably infuriate him, but for her own peace of mind she needed to know.

The Joker couldn't help but snarl. "I am _not_ attracted to you! Leave it to a beau-tee-ful woman to get all egotistical just because a man's in her bed! And the only reason we had a so-called "tryst" is because I do things, uh...without really thinking them through." Gnawing on his scarred lip, he muttered "You both have the same irritatingly positive outlook on life, and, uh...you have her eyes."

Glaring off to the side, the Joker slid slightly away from Rachel so he could avoid her scent and soft, soapy skin, his eyes closing as he took a breath and deeply exhaled.

The Joker reacted exactly as she thought he would, but this didn't faze Rachel in the slightest. Placing her hand on his shoulder, she sweetly whispered against his ear "I don't deny my attraction, so why do you push me away? I know somewhere deep inside is that person who was able to 'love' Celeste, so why do you fight him?"

The Joker stiffened when he felt Rachel touch his arm, a shiver running down his spine when she began whispering in his ear about her attraction. With quivering arms, he hesitantly reached out to encircle her waist, his lips brushing against the crook of her neck as he inhaled her scent more deeply. She was so perfect and soft, and the fact that she wanted him made him believe that he was in a dream opposed to reality. Since his head was fuzzy from blood loss, he was much more vulnerable than usual, but the moment he realized that her lips were brushing against his, the Joker panicked and jolted away from her as if he'd been burned.

"Stay away from me" he growled, now rolling over and curling up into a ball. Squeezing his eyes shut as if this would keep her away, the clown prince irritably explained "I don't love, because I _can't_ love, so stop trying to turn me into a pussy!"

Sitting up on her knees and looking at his back, Rachel sighed deeply while insisting, "Love does _not_ make you a pussy...and you _are_ capable of love, but you just refuse to accept the fact. There is a _big_ difference."

"Ahhh, and when did you become such an _expert_ on my feelings, hmm?" the Joker demanded, his voice dripping with bitterness as he took one of her pillows and pulled it over top of his head. He didn't want to see her, he didn't want to hear her, and he most _certainly_ didn't want to feel her, because then he would _want_ her, and in order for his plan to keep working, a distraction like that just wouldn't _do._

"Y'know what _else_ is a big difference?" the Joker finally spoke up. "Love and lust. I do _not_ love, I lust, and I buh-lieve the same goes for you, peaches. You don't even _know_ me."

Rachel sat there listening to him as he continued to speak without looking at her, her frustration mounting as she rose from the bed and snatching a pillow and a blanket. "God, you are _impossible!_ I don't even know why I even bother!" Storming into the living room, she plopped down onto the sofa and laid back with her eyes closed.

"Good question" the Joker hollered after her. "Why _do_ you bother? You just ruined a per-fect-ly good game, sweetness, so thanks for nothing!" Slightly wishing that she'd come back -- he rather enjoyed annoying the hell out of her, after all -- the clown prince suddenly smirked and added "I hope you like drool, 'cause I plan on slobbering _aaaall_ over your pillow and bedsheets! Thanks for giving me the bed, HA!"

Hearing him yell from the other room, she groaned and picked up a glass ashtray, tossing it toward the bedroom where it hit the wall and shattered into a thousand pieces. Now yanking the covers over her head, she flipped over facing the back of the couch while returning, "You're welcome, ASSHOLE!"

"Welcome to what asshole? _Yours?_ 'Cause sorry, but I'm not much of a backdoor man!" the Joker shouted back, giggling as he climbed out of bed and stretched his limbs. Taking his pillow with him, he sneered when he noticed that Rachel had hers over her own face, his foot nudging her so that she shrieked and sat up in surprise. Using this to his advantage, the Joker smacked her across her now exposed face with his pillow, a triumphant "HA!" escaping his lips as he hit her once again. "That oughta teach ya for being an uptight bitch!"

Giggling, he tried to hold her still by stepping on her, but she was squirming way too much to keep her still.

_"Uptight?_ Screw you, I am _far_ from uptight! You're the one that has a stick up his ass all the time!" Now managing to get a hand free, she picked up her pillow and smacked him as hard as she could. "Get _off_ me, asshole!"

Making a show of looking over his shoulder, the Joker shook his head before remarking "Nope! Don't see a stick up there! And if you're making some sort of gay joke, I buh-lieve you and I know _per_-fectly well that I like women." Just as he turned back around, Rachel's pillow collided into the side of his face with all her strength. Laughing uproariously, he ripped the pillow from her hand and began to pummel her with both pillows. "Who's an asshole _now,_ gum drop? I'm just a guy who buh-lieves in having fun!"

Giggling as she tried to shield her face, he pushed her down off the couch and onto her back, his knees keeping her firmly in place as he sneered in triumph.

_"Fun?_ You call beating me senseless _fun?!"_ Rachel asked, almost breathless as he sat on top of her and held her in place with his knees. Looking up at him, her eyebrows furrowed. "You know, I'm still mad at you"

The Joker grinned. "Well, of course I do! Which is ex-_act_-ly what makes this so much fun! Do you think it'd be _fun_ if you were en-_joying_ it?" Giggling, he smacked her in the face with the pillows again before placing one on her chest, his head now resting on it as he pretended to get comfortable. "Ahhh, nothing like a good ol' human bed, eh, Racheroni? It's a slumber party at its best! Now hold stiiiiill so I can get some sleep!"

Rachel gave him the evil eye when he stated that a human bed was the best kind, her body lying still for a moment as she watched him lay there. His breathing became slow and regular, so when she thought he was comfortable, she bucked up her hips and flung him to the floor before jumping to her feet. "Ha! Not so fun now, eh?"

"Heeeey, that wasn't very nice!" the Joker complained, rubbing his eyes as he glared up at her. "What's the matter, jealous that I was having wet dreams over other women?" Giggling, he reached out and grabbed her by the ankle, forcing her to fall on her backside as he hurriedly slid into her lap. Leering triumphantly at her disposition, he took her wrists and pinned them above her head, his lips hovering over hers as he purred "If you say Uncle, I'll let you go... _Maybe._ Or better yet, if you do what-_ev_-er I want for the rest of the night, I'll re-lease you."

Looking up at him and feeling his breath on her face, Rachel closed her eyes while trying to fight the urge to kiss him. "Whatever...you want?" she breathlessly asked. "And what might that be?"

The Joker leered down at her, having expected this sort of response. "Well if I were to tell you _that,_ it would take away the element of sur-_prise_, now wouldn't it?" he smugly insisted, enjoying the way her breath hitched in her throat as he brushed his lips across her chin. "Maybe we'll even do what _you_ want, too...I can be a niiiice guuuuy, after all. But _only_ when I want to be."

Moving his hands down from her wrists to her hips, he grinned down at her with a giggle. "So what's it gonna be, honey bunch? Me sitting on you forever, or you doing whatever I say?"

Rolling her eyes, Rachel sourly returned, "If it will get your heavy ass off of me, I suppose I'll do whatever you want..."

"Heavy ass?" the Joker reiterated, feigning a look of hurt. Sneering at her response, he then leapt off of her before lying flat on his stomach, a pleased little grin forming across his lips as he urged "Give me a backrub, and be nice and slow about it. I'm all achy, and when I'm achy, that means I'm a veeeeery impatient clown." His grin and constant giggles, however, clearly said otherwise.

As he yawned and waited for Rachel to join him, he cracked open an eye and watched as she came toward his prostrate form. The sight of her sheer nighty had him shivering slightly, his teeth gnawing into his lower lip as he felt her hips slide over his bottom as she sat down. Turning his head so that he could groan into the carpet, he ignored the growing ache in his pants as he waited for her to touch him.

Although Rachel was rather surprised by the Joker's request, she found that it wasn't as bad as she thought it would be. Slowly crawling toward him, the bottom of her sheer nighty rode up her creamy thighs as she straddled him, sitting on his backside as she slowly started rubbing his back. Methodically working her way up to his shoulders, her hips moved forward as she leaned across him to reach his neck, the sheer fabric of her nightgown grazing sensually across his bare skin.

"Hmm, are you a pro-fessional?" the Joker asked, smirking as he closed his eyes and tensed from the heat that her touch brought his lower extremities. Growling softly when Rachel kneaded a particularly sore area, he lifted his hips so that he could move his arm in between himself and his body. Now slipping a hand down his pants, he curled his fingers around his arousal and began to slowly pump himself, his free hand reaching behind him in order to caress the softness of Rachel's thigh. Groaning against the carpet, he imagined her body lying helplessly beneath him as he pounded into her, his teeth gritting as he began to jerk-off at a faster pace. Not caring if Rachel knew what the hell he was doing, he began to curse as a familiar pressure built up in his groin.

Hearing him growl as she kneaded the spot between his shoulder blades, Rachel could feel his body moving beneath her as his hand crept up and began caressing the softness of her inner thigh. Hearing his moans, she couldn't help but smile. "Does it feel good?" she asked, bending over to whisper softly in his ear, _"How_ good?"

The Joker quivered when her lips brushed against his ear, the ache building in his groin as he turned and licked her mouth. "Better than you know, sweetcakes, so stop teasing" he urged, smirking as he continued to rub his hand against her thigh. "Since you asked me a question, how about I give you one, too, hmm? Are you, uh..._wet?"_ Before she could even reply, his slid his hand beneath her nighty and dipped his fingers past her panties, a soft growl rumbling in his throat when he felt the moisture from her slit. Retracting his hand, he made a show of licking his fingers as he began to thrust more desperately beneath her, her juices triggering something animalistic inside of him as he shuddered and moved his hand at a frenetic pace. "You bitch" he hissed, but far too quietly for Rachel to distinguish.

When his hand slid slowly inside, Rachel arched her back and moaned softly, only to be disappointed when he retracted his fingers and slowly licked each one, tasting her sweet juices as if they were wine. She returned to the massage, running her hands slowly up and down his back as she felt his hips bucking underneath her as he growled something unidentifiable to her.

Panting, the Joker rolled over in Rachel's arms and halted her movements, his hands coming down in order to cup her rump as he forced her hips to grind against his bare arousal. Groaning and arching his back, he placed a hand behind her head before urging her down toward him, his tongue almost hesitantly gliding across her lips before he crashed his mouth urgently against hers. Grinding at a faster, more desperate pace, he moved his lips toward her ear before gasping out "I want you from behind."

As he rolled Rachel over, she could feel his erection against her as he ground up against her, groaning and arching his back as he grabbed the back of her head and brought her down to him. Gliding his tongue slowly across her lips, he began grinding harder and faster against her heat, making her moan against his warm mouth. Pulling away, his lips met her ear as he rasped out that he wanted her from behind.

Looking at him for a moment, Rachel knew that she couldn't refuse as she turned away and slipped off her wet panties, tossing them aside before resting her weight on her hands as she closed her eyes in anticipation.

Breathing shallowly as he watched Rachel get on her hands and knees, the Joker had to admit that he was stunned by her acquiescence. She actually wanted to do this..._again?_ The idea that a woman willingly wanted him, and for the _second_ time made the Joker think that she actually didn't, because he'd never been able to get a beautiful woman to do what Rachel was doing without some sort of fight.

Unsteadily making his way over to her, he suppressed a giggle when she gave a gasp of surprise, because she obviously wasn't expecting him to lift her up from behind to her feet. "I want you against that table" he explained, his lips brushing against the nape of her neck as he pushed her down against the tabletop. Seeing her bent over in the complete picture of surrender, he groaned and lowered his mouth to the soft skin of her back. Licking and nipping at the crook of her neck, he whimpered against her skin before kissing the afflicted spot almost tenderly, his hands now hiking up her nighty so that it slid well over her bare bottom. Shivering from the sensation of her body pressed against his erection, he began to teasingly slide his tip against her wetness, his teeth gently nipping at her ear as he groaned softly. After fantasizing about this moment for a full month, he didn't have enough willpower to _not_ take her. With only a moment's hesitation, he buried himself inside her to the hilt, his lips steeling back a growl as he gritted his teeth and felt her body snugly take him in.

Rachel felt as if she was under a spell as she gave in to his every command, her hands grasping the edge of the table as she felt the tip of his erection pressing against her outer lips. With a sudden forceful thrust, he sank the entire length of his shaft deep inside her as she stretched to accommodate his girth.

Grunting, the Joker buried his face against the nape of her neck and gently bit down, his lips and tongue working against her skin as he continued to diligently thrust inside her. Squeezing her breasts, he shuddered as he listened to her soft moans, his hand slinking upward in order to take her by the chin. Promptly forcing her to look at him over his shoulder, he brought their lips roughly together as he slid his tongue inside her mouth. Groaning into the heated kiss, he gave quick, powerful pumps as he licked and bit at her lips, his hand sliding through her hair as the table continued to rock violently from side to side. The electrical feeling coursing through his veins almost made him euphoric, his growls rumbling deep in his chest as he kept up his animalistic rutting. He knew she wanted him, but the sick part of him wanted to hear her sounds to reaffirm the fact.

As he thrust deeper, Rachel moaned as she stretched to accommodate his large girth, the feeling caused her muscles to squeeze tightly around his member as she throbbed and moaned. Grabbing her chin, he forced her to look over her shoulder as he slammed into her again and again, his lips roughly meeting with hers as his tongue slid past her lips and dueled forcefully with hers. He groaned into the kiss while licking and biting her plump lips, his powerful thrusts causing the table to rock on it legs while banging against the floor from the force. Feeling his fingers in her hair, she leaned back as he sank deeper inside her as whole body shook with an orgasm. "Oh fuck.....take me" she whimpered almost breathlessly.

"Hmm, I didn't think DA's had such dirty mouths" the Joker teased, his voice low and tainted by lust as he licked her lips. Kissing his way down from her chin to her neck, he growled against her skin as he dug his nails into her hips and pounded into her more forcefully, his thrusts alternating in between quick and frantic to slow and forceful. He didn't like to develop a pattern, because then he knew Rachel would be expecting a certain speed; he _always_ liked to keep people guessing, and with love-making things were no different. Groaning and gasping against her neck, he shuddered as he felt her inner muscles squeezing him tightly, his teeth sinking into her shoulder in order to quiet his moans as he frantically jerked his hips. He was surrounded by hot, wet, and _tight,_ and he honestly didn't know how much longer he could last.

Suddenly halting his movements, he withdrew from Rachel's warm haven and flipped her around in his embrace, his arms now lifting her up so that he pinned her against the wall. Biting down on her neck, he forced her to sink back down onto his shaft as he continued to fuck her at a more vigorous pace, his breath warm and hot against her skin as he panted breathlessly.

Rachel moaned, biting down on her lower lip hard enough to draw blood as he continued to thrust himself deep inside her, her muscles stretching and contracting against his cock as he alternated his thrusts between hard and fast and slow and forceful, his hips grinding into hers at different angles and hitting her very core. The feeling of his hot breath on her baked skin caused her nipples to harden, and when he sank his teeth into her shoulder she moaned out loudly, "Oh, _God!_ I'm cumming, again!"

The Joker suddenly halted his movements, thus causing her walls to pulse and throb as he withdrew and flipped her over. Lifting her up in his arms, he pinned her against the wall and forcefully lowered her down onto his shaft as he started to fuck her again at a fast, and frantic speed. Her juices exploded, trickling in a sticky flow between them as she heard his low moans, knowing that he, too was close to orgasm.

Cursing when the Joker felt Rachel milking him, he panted against the soft hollow of her neck and shuddered when her legs squeezed around his hips, his nails digging into her shoulders as he gave several low, animalistic grunts. Ramming into her with all his strength, he snarled against her warm skin as the sound of their mingled moans reached his ears like strangely alluring music. Biting down on her shoulder, the Joker pleaded feebly against her skin, "When the time comes, call me Jack", his nails digging into her hips as he shuddered and scratched with a certain desperation at her body. He felt his arousal pulse inside her, and then he came in a sudden, violent explosion that left him shuddering from his head to his toes.

When the Joker's body shook and his cock pulsed and grew, Rachel felt him finally come undone as she dug her nails deep into his back. "Oh, _Jack..."_ she gasped out, careful to follow through with his plea. Both of them exploded in a massive orgasm, her whole body shaking in his grip and her legs wrapping tighter around his hips.

Their juices now mixed together as he panted against her neck, she leaned her head back as her eyes closed in a moment of pure ecstasy.

Panting against Rachel's neck, the Joker slumped against her chest and mumbled something indistinguishable, his lips almost tenderly brushing against her skin as he closed his eyes and tried to catch his breath.

As usual, the Joker was the first to recover, his teeth gritting as he slowly withdrew from her warmth and groaned at the sensation. When she'd called him Jack, it almost seemed surreal…nobody had linked that name with him for over 15 years, so the idea that he'd told Rachel in the heat of the moment angered him. He knew that he'd _wanted_ to hear her say his name, but on the other hand, he was fully aware that something so intimate might make Rachel feel attached to him. He didn't love her – he _couldn't_ love her – so there was no use in torturing the poor girl. And yet, a sick part of him _liked_ torturing Rachel, because he felt that everyone in the world deserved to feel the pain that he did.

Slowly pulling away from Rachel, the Joker abruptly turned and zipped up his pants in silence. It was as if he was ignoring her presence altogether, and yet he clearly wanted to speak since he kept grinding his teeth.

After he'd withdrawn from her, Rachel sat down onto the carpeted floor, her knees still weak as she tried to figure out why he hated her unless they were having sex. Then and only then could she see a different side to him, and she couldn't help but wonder why that was. Gathering up her panties, she slipped them on while mumbling, "So I guess I'm getting the silent treatment, again…you really confuse me, Jack."

As she turned away from him and walked over to the window, she realized that the truth confused even herself. How could she continue to give in to this man? What was she _thinking?_

The Joker couldn't help but wince. "Don't call me that" he pleaded. "Not now, anyway…" His real name made him seem more human, and he didn't like the emotional baggage that came with it. In reality, he was completely stumped about how to handle this woman, and because of this, he felt the need to dispose of her and wash his hands of her existence entirely. And yet, he'd been _trying_ to kill her for the past few months, and had failed miserably every single time. Their relationship (if it could even be called that) consisted of an uphill struggle of constant twists, turns, abrasive arguments, and mindless sex. Or at least, it had been mindless up until a few minutes ago. He felt as if he'd almost put his heart into fucking her, and he didn't like that.

Not. One. _Bit._

Turning toward Rachel with a dark look in his eyes, the Joker shrugged while asking, "What do you want me to do, hmm? Take you in my arms like in those pussy romance novels, sway you back and forth in my embrace, and then profess my undying love to you? I've already told you before that I'm not that kinda guy, so I wish you'd stop acting so damn surprised."

Rachel cringed, because she knew he was right. Glaring back at him, as she pulled her hair up into a clip and grabbed her keys and purse. "You know what? You're right, I _shouldn't_ act surprised. I mean, who even believes in such bullshit like love anymore? Sex is sex, so thanks for the fuck" she snarled, her heart racing as she headed toward the door.

Although the Joker felt a thrill that Rachel was leaving, he couldn't help but add fuel to the flames as he called after her, "Well aren't you going to _pay_ me, too? I think I deserve a fairly decent amount for that little performance, don't you?" Sneering when she turned back around to eye him critically, the clown prince finally straightened his stance and stormed over to her, his body wedging in between hers so that he was blocking the door. "Going somewhere?" he hissed, a feral glint coming to his eyes. "This is _your_ apartment, you know, so it'd be awful _foolish_ if you were the one to leave."

If the Joker didn't know any better, he could've sworn that he saw tears in Rachel's eyes, but he shrugged it off and decided that he'd been imagining things. With his voice softening only slightly, he irritably growled out, "What do you want from me, Rachel? I have nothing to give." The resigned tone to his voice seemed so tired and final, and the fact that he'd actually spoken Rachel's true name seemed to speak volumes.  
"I don't care where I'm going, as long as I'm away from you" she snapped back, the tears now welling up in her eyes. His tone changed slightly as he asked what she wanted from him, so she paused before softly returning, "What do I want? Well what do _you_ want, Ja....?" She started to call him by his name, but then stopped. Why were they tormenting each other when they obviously didn't know what they truly wanted?

"What do I want?" the Joker reiterated, now giving a humorless laugh. "Beautiful, all that I've ever wanted is now a dead, misshapen dream, so what's the point of even trying to revive it? My mother's dead, my sister's dead, and as far as I'm concerned, _I'm_ dead, too. If anything, I wish I was six feet under so I could put all this mess behind me. _That_ is what I want."

Staring numbly back at her, the clown prince's breathing grew more shallow as a lump formed in his throat. Rachel always had this unnerving way of appearing concerned when she shouldn't be, and it somehow made her all the more beautiful in his eyes. He hated compassion of any kind, but somehow he found himself craving the attention she gave him. He hated her for it, but most importantly, he hated himself. Why did he allow this woman to worm her way into his life like she mattered? Like _he_ mattered?

Casting his gaze down toward the carpet, he finally muttered, "Maybe I should go."

Rachel stood there in the shadows of the moon and listened as he explained that all he'd ever wanted was now a dream, and that everyone he loved was dead. She could see the pain in his eyes and knew that he refused to let her in, but as far as she was concerned, he was a lost soul that needed a reason to live.

When he mumbled that he should probably go, she grabbed his arm and turned him around to face her. "Why do you feel that you have nothing to live for?" she pitifully asked. "Why can't you just let someone in? Is the thought of having someone to care for you _that_ hideous?"

The Joker stared back at Rachel in disbelief, the corners of his lips quirking upward as he gave a dry laugh. "What, are you trying to say that _you_ want to be that someone? That _you_ actually give two shits about what I do with my life?" Allowing the laughter to reach its full-blown crescendo, he shook his head as he stared back at her with a crooked grin. "You lawyers are a real piece of work, you know that? A _reeeal_ piece of work."

Running a hand down over his face, the Joker allowed his make-up to smear into several ugly white, red, pink, black, and grey streaks. He didn't care what he looked like at the moment, because all he knew was that he'd just become the biggest joke in Gotham. He felt as if Rachel was making fun of him with those big, innocently concerned eyes, her tilted head, and her placating gestures, his gaze narrowing as he allowed his arms to drop limply at his sides. "You don't care" he mumbled, but he said it almost like a question, his lips pressing tightly together as he longed to prove that she _didn't_ care. That, after all, would make things so much easier for them both.

Throwing her keys down onto the table, Rachel glared at him. "Don't you dare tell me how _I_ fucking feel! You are _not_ me, and you obviously don't have any idea how I feel about you!" Her anger was building at his remarks, because she knew that she _did_ care, and that was the problem.

The Joker was stumped. He was growing increasingly confused by how to handle this woman, and it angered him. It angered him so much, in fact, that he wanted to curl his hands around Rachel's throat and just _squeeze._

Sneering at the fury in her eyes, the Joker drew close to her at an intimidating degree, his gaze dark and scornful as he agreed, "Alright, so I _don't_ know how you feel, but you can't honestly say you'd forgive me if I hit you, right? If I _shoved_ you?" As if testing Rachel, he gave her a quick shove that only sent her staggering back to a minor degree, but in that single push, the Joker felt a tremendous sense of release. He enjoyed seeing her helpless, because whether Rachel knew it or not, _she_ had made _him_ feel helpless, and he didn't like that. When her pitiful gaze finally met with his, however, he couldn't help but feel slightly taken aback. The pain on her face was evident, and he suddenly felt completely rotten for being the cause of that expression.

Opening his mouth as if to apologize, he quickly closed it and glowered off to the side. "You don't care" he stated yet again, except this time he said it as though it were a definitive fact.

Looking away, Rachel exhaled deeply. "Is that how I have to show you that I care? By being your little punching bag? Does it make you feel _good_ to hurt me?"

The Joker felt his shoulders stiffen. This woman was _infuriating_ since she couldn't see that being around him was bad for her…that it was bad for them _both._ He hadn't truly wanted to shove her (domestic violence wasn't really his cup of tea, after all), but he figured it might have a sobering effect. Unfortunately, it only seemed to cause the opposite. Rachel seemed more resolute in her opinions than ever, and somehow he found himself admiring her for it. No woman (or man, for that matter) had ever truly stood by their guns when arguing with him, so for that reason he had to respect her. On the other hand, she was really starting to irritate him, and he didn't like the constant rollercoaster that his emotions were taking with this woman.

Approaching her with cold, measured steps, the Joker drew in close to her face while growling, "When you look at me, what do you see, hmm? A cold, unfeeling monster…someone who's so _broken_ that they need to be fixed, right? Because, uh…believe me, beautiful, I _know_ why you're doing this, and it's because you women feel the need to protect and shelter the bruised souls in this world. Well guess what? I do _not_ need your sympathy, and I do _not_ need your 'looove', or whatever you're claiming to feel for me, because it will _not_ change who I am!"

Rachel stood there with her back straight and her arms folded across her chest as she glared at him. She could not, and _would_ not show weakness since that was what he wanted. As he approached her he drew in close so their faces were mere centimeters apart, her heart racing as she returned "I am _not_ a "charity" worker, Jack, so get that straight. I'm not trying to give you my sympathy, and I'm not quite sure why I "care" about you the way I do, so as far as my changing you...well, all I want is to be a small part of your life. Just let me in a little..." She stopped speaking, suddenly realizing the words that had just slipped from her mouth. Was she really going insane? Why did he cause all of this in her?

The Joker was considerably taken aback by Rachel's words, his painted brows furrowing as he clenched his fists at his sides. "A small part of my life?" he incredulously repeated. "And what the hell does that even _mean,_ hmm? You want to be my partner in crime? You want to come over every Friday night and clean out my toilets?" Giggling humorlessly at the thought, he shook his head while agreeing, "You're fucked-up, Rachel, but I've got to admire your persistence. I don't know how much "more" I can let you in, anyway…I've already told you about my sister and Celeste, and how I got my scars, so what more do you even _need_ to know? There's nothing to me but a crazy man with a vendetta, so if you actually _want_ to be a part of all that, then yeah, I'd have to agree that you _are_ insane." Still frowning, the Joker studied Rachel's face with the hopes of understanding why she was behaving the way she was, but nothing was clicking. He hated the fact that he couldn't read her like the others, because it was almost as if a wall of communication had them closed off from one another. He wanted to see her true colors, to _understand_ her, but he also refused to get any closer than what was necessary, and as far as he was concerned, he'd crossed that boundary long ago. "I can't" he finally spoke, his voice cold and firm. "I'm not your fairytale prince, and you're not my little princess, so just get that idea out of your head right now."

Rachel winced. "Jack, I know you're scared, but…"

_"Stop_ fucking _calling_ me that!"

"B-but Jack…"

_"Stop_ it, goddammit!" In a flash, the Joker whipped out a pistol and held it to her head with shaking hands, his tongue repeatedly snaking along his lips out of nervous habit. The fire in his eyes was feverish and panicked, his breathing anything but calm as he hissed, "Leave. Me. _Alone,_ Rachel…I _don't_ want you!"

Hurt, Rachel hardly even seemed to notice the gun as she felt tears prickling along her lashes, her chin raising out of pride as she fired back, "You're so goddamn stubborn that you don't even _know_ what you want, Jack, so don't say that you don't want me when I _know_ you do! It's _ok_ to need someone, you know! It doesn't make you a weak man!"

Moving toward him with her arms outstretched, she barely had time to react the moment a loud, deafening _BANG!_ erupted and momentarily illuminated the dim room. With a sharp gasp, Rachel glanced down just in time to see a large, scarlet bloom spreading across her front, her eyes returning to the Joker's in shock as she dropped down to her knees. "Jack…" she pitifully rasped, now grasping at his pant legs as she doubled over. "Jack, _why?"_

Trembling, the Joker dropped the gun and sank down to the floor beside her, his arms encircling her waist as he pulled her into his lap and rested her head beneath his chin. He could feel her shiver and shake from the shock, his hand almost reverently stroking her hair as he shushed her amidst her soft sobs. Although he didn't feel majorly different about harming Rachel than the others, there was a distinct emptiness in his core that flared within him like an icy void. He was so unbearably _cold,_ yet he chalked it up as his soul finally dying opposed to any sort of guilt. He could _never_ feel guilt, and he knew that.

When he felt Rachel expire noiselessly against his chest, the Joker pressed his cheek to hers and felt something wet along his lashes.

_'Must be something in my eye'_ he thought, his hand cradling Rachel's head as he gently laid her down across the carpet. It couldn't have worked out between them even if he'd wanted it to, he somberly realized, because she was a hopeless optimistic, and he was far too gone to ever give her the life that she deserved.

As the Joker slowly rose to his feet, he understood then that there was no point in destroying Batman any longer, because as far as the clown prince was concerned, he'd just destroyed a small part of himself: Rachel, who'd always been there, Rachel, who'd seemed to actually _love_ him. Kneeling down alongside her, the Joker felt completely numb to the world as he reached out and forced her eyes to close.

_Pleasant dreams._


End file.
